CallaFirestormBW
Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
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I think that any time you open up a formerly insular community in the way that electronic media have done with BDSM, you change the nature of that community. Until the rise of the internet, there may have been localized variations in how things were done, how situations were handled, how membership was managed, and how things like mentorship and training were described and enacted, but in general, the local groups were more tolerant of one another, if only because it really was a matter of "them against the world". There was a better grasp of privacy, which was a positive thing in that it protected those who wanted to be a part of this life but couldn't afford the scrutiny of their actions... but it had a down side as well, since predators were less likely to be exposed as such, except within the boundaries of a given local group... so if one wore out one's welcome in -one- group, then the only requirement was to insinuate oneself in a -different- group and start all over again.
The down side, for me, of the rapidly proliferating information stream for WIITWD (what it is that we do) is that we've lost much of our sense of community. If -anyone- is welcomed into a group, the sense of camaraderie diminishes, and arguments about different processes, concepts, and experiences become more prevalent. The other problem that I've seen as WIITWD has become more publicised and access has become easier is that there has been a persistent, if subtle, push to 'mainstream' WIITWD... to make it more palatable to those who are not as comfortable with great risks... to judge those who behave in a manner that the general society might find corrupt or distasteful... to marginalize those who choose something other than the 'safe', 'rational' approach to WIITWD.
On a positive note, the ability to find information has probably saved more than a few individuals from self-loathing and depression, giving them the opportunity to see that they are not alone in the things that they like. It has probably also saved more than a few individuals from permanent damage to their bodies and minds, by providing information on how to handle skills that, frankly, can be downright dangerous at times.
Overall, to me, it is a mixed bag. It's given me the chance to meet some wonderful people whom I probably wouldn't have gotten to know a decade ago... and it has given me the chance to educate my own young adults as they came of age and expressed interest and curiousity, and to do so in a way that I know will allow them to explore their own interests safely, and have respect for the wide variety of interests existing in the world. At the same time, because of what I prefer, I find that I am drifting further and further from the mainstream center of WIITWD, and establishing a place for myself on the new fringes of the 'fringe movement' that still tends to call itself BDSM, though it encompasses much more than that these days. I find that I'm not all that thrilled about the mainstreaming of my 'fringe culture', not just in WIITWD, but in other areas in which I've hovered on the cultural fringe of the world... but change is inevitable, and changes mean not only external changes in the culture, but changes and clarifications in oneself -- so whether or not we perceive it as a positive, negative, or neutral force, change happens, and one way or another, we must find a way to reconcile ourselves to it.
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Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"
"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer
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RE: Technology changing how you interact - 
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