Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct

Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion

Message

lobodomslavery -> Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 10:10:13 AM)
Have your say have a good New Year kevin

littlewonder -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 10:19:04 AM)
If they're consistently lazy that should tell you something about their attitude and personally while I'm not a dom, if I was I certainly wouldn't want to waste my time with them.

immoral -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 10:23:47 AM)
As actions frequently speak louder than words, a cant be bothered attitude isnt really a respectful one and while respect can be earned, i do think it would need to be a special person to make the efort worthwhile.

utopicus -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 10:29:48 AM)
Laziness is a negative trait, I'm afraid... Regardless of your dedication in providing "instruction", it's not going to disappear I'm afraid.

JustDarkness -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 10:50:04 AM)
I never force them to serve..they choose that life. If they are lazy in that...then they are not for me. Not gonna put time in that.

yourMissTress -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 11:08:28 AM)
Lazy in what way? Lazy: they don't feel like getting up off the couch to do things but they do anyway because they've been told to? Lazy: they have to be MADE to do every single thing? The first one is ok, though I find most service oriented subs to be not at all lazy. As long as they are doing as told, I don't really care if they want to do it or not. The second is NOT ok. I don't want to be someone's mother.

ChainedExistence -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 11:15:07 AM)
Saying someone is Lazy is an overused go-to response for explaining why someone is not doing what is expected. It's important to examine if that is the true cause. Have the expectations been clearly articulated? Is the person knowledgeable enough to achieve what is expected? Are expectations unreasonable in any way- timelines are too short, or does the task require equipment that the person does not possess? Is the person someone who is intrinsically motivated, or do they need some kind of external motivation and if so, is that being provided? Are any other factors impeding progress and success? I always feel that people can improve- it's a matter of finding what works for that individual and investing the time and energy into that effort. That's why I never think a Dom's job is easy..it's not a matter of sitting back and ordering up the perfect slave. If you get one...well, that's nice, but I doubt it happens all that often. Most relationships require work from both parties.

daddysliloneds -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 11:16:27 AM)
sometimes laziness comes from depression, a lack of inspiration, or defiance of some sort; sometimes it comes about from menopause, medications, lack of sun, etc.... so, depending on the reason for the laziness, i could see it as bad news as well as an opportunity to help bring about change, but not necessarily as an opportnity to instruct someone.

JustDarkness -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 11:20:57 AM)
quote: laziness comes from depression I would call that beeing extreme tired..instead of laziness...personally

yourMissTress -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 11:26:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: daddysliloneds sometimes laziness comes from depression, a lack of inspiration, or defiance of some sort; sometimes it comes about from menopause, medications, lack of sun, etc.... I don't equate these things with laziness. These are illnesses and or medical conditions, not at all behavioral issues, but certainly medical issues. Chalking up such things to laziness would be inconsiderate and cruel. Lack of inspiration or defiance, are behavioral issues which would have less to do with laziness and more to do with a problem in the relationship. Why are they not inspired? What is the source of defiance? They are also temporary problems, if dealt with completely and correctly.

lobodomslavery -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 12:11:46 PM)
Depression is a completely different kettle of fish. they deserve sympathy and lots of encouragement for every effort kevin

Lynnxz -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 12:15:06 PM)
I'd think a lazy person would cease to be a servant eventually. No use keeping them around.

Padriag -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 12:31:39 PM)
Indeed... of what use is someone who refuses to be of any use? Is not a servants job... their purpose... to be useful through service? In the words of The Donald You're Fired! Or was someone looking for a dominant to "fix" them?

LaTigresse -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 12:37:31 PM)
I've no time for a servant that doesn't want to serve. They either do or they don't. If they don't then, to me, they are not a servant.

LadyPact -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 12:44:32 PM)
I have to disagree. Why is depression an automatic reason for a person to deserve sympathy? They might hope to have support and encouragement from the people who care about them, but not some abject blanket method of how they should be treated. Too often, folks with a physical or mental illness use that illness as a crutch to attempt to manipulate others to treat them in a way that excuses any and all behaviors. If they are working on their issues, that is one thing. If they are falling back on what is wrong with them as a reason not to make any improvements that they can, that's another. It's how that individual is dealing with the problem that determines how their efforts should be treated. quote: ORIGINAL: lobodomslavery Depression is a completely different kettle of fish. they deserve sympathy and lots of encouragement for every effort kevin As to the topic on a submissive who is lazy, it doesn't bother Me much. I'm more than happy to save them the effort by holding the door open so they can remove themselves from My service.

lobodomslavery -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 1:15:14 PM)
each situation is different , i dont condone but neither do i condone people's behaviour as i simply dont know, what is acceptable and not is impossible to pin down kevin

sblady -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 1:19:53 PM)
I suppose I need the definition of lazy from the OP's perspective. I'll often use the phrase "lazy" as I loathe housework. My home is usually well maintained barring flare ups of physical issues. However, there are times where I could apply a bit of discipline, which I've done today by staying away from the forums. [:D] I often tell people I'm not service oriented as I have a fulltime, demanding job which may or may not require overtime. Additionally, I don't live with my Dominant (friend) and he doesn't expect me to maintain his home, my home and hold down a fulltime job. However, if he's visiting, I make sure everything is neat and tidy and he doesn't want for anything. So, I guess it will depend on the Dominant; some may feel I'm lazy, some may understand that it's difficult to juggle all of the above and still have enough energy to serve him in other ways.

GoodFeathers -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 1:40:56 PM)
I admit to having my lazy days, but typically, if I am "on the clock" so to speak, I'll still peel my butt up off the couch and take care of my duties. Do I like to do dishes? Not always, but if I see it needs to be done, then I'll do it. If it's a day where I don't feel like doing anything, it may take awhile for me to get to the dishes, but I'll get there. I don't find all the time laziness to be an opportunity to instruct. It's highly negative and self-defeating behavior and it's not something you can train out of a person. They may have a great personality, wonderful sense of humor, but if they don't take care of their little responsibilities, what is there to make any dom think that person will take care of the big responsibilities, should they come along?

IronBear -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 3:03:50 PM)
Those with a lazy streak (not chronic laziness), have some hope of rescue if one can find the triggers to get them moving and what causes the laziness. Like animals, sometimes love and patience can work miracles and give you a gem......If you are prepared to invest the time, energy and training.. Chronic Laziness is an easy one. Offer them to the highest bidder (military preferably) for mobile target practice and then claim the carcasses which can be processed into pet food or blood & bones fertilizer. At least the lazy sods will have been usefully for once in their lives. And you think I’m joking?

DesFIP -> RE: Lazy servants bad news or an opportunity to instruct (12/28/2008 6:27:23 PM)
Submissive doesn't equal service oriented. I'm submissive but not service oriented. So maybe stop pigeon holing people and assuming they're lazy or not trained and see if they really are service oriented or not? Try something really novel and see how people are, not what you want them to be. Talk to them, and much more importantly try listening.

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.03125