RE: Posting on experience

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Posting on experience

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Posting on experience

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Posting on experience - 12/14/2008 6:18:14 PM

BKSir

Posts: 4037
Joined: 4/8/2008
From: Salt Lake City, UT
Status: offline

I try to make it a general rule to only open my big yap if I actually have experience on a subject. Even if it's an opinion type, I hope to have enough going on in my hollow head to at least give half decent reasons for said opinion. :)

I skip a lot of threads, mostly because they don't interest me. If there's one of interest but I don't have any experience, I often hit it, if for no other reason than to try and learn something hopefully.

_____________________________

We'll begin with a spin, traveling in a world of my creation. What we'll see will defy explanation.

I am the voices in your head.

BiggKatt Studios

(in reply to slavejali)

Post #: 21

RE: Posting on experience - 12/14/2008 6:19:17 PM

Jeptha

Posts: 780
Joined: 9/18/2008
From: Portland, Oregon
Status: offline

I generally won't reply if I have no experience in the matter, with some exceptions for topics in which I am particularly interested and curious about.

If I have no experience in the matter, I believe that I usually make that fact explicit.
At least I hope I do.

The topic of "slaves" is one example.

I'm interested in the topic, but have not had a slave (as I understand the term), so, most of my comments on those types of threads have been to ask further questions, and I usually try to include the caveat that it's all theory for me at this point, as far as that goes.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 22

RE: Posting on experience - 12/14/2008 6:20:48 PM

DavanKael

Posts: 3072
Joined: 10/6/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Which leads Me to My actual questions. When considering responding to a thread, do you post an answer only if you have actual experience on the topic? If you have no experience, do you skip the thread? If you have an opinion on the matter, but no actual experience, do you state in your reply that it is your opinion only and not based on something you have actually done or had as a part of your life? Do you state your opinion without the disclaimer that it is not something that you have participated in yourself?

Hi, LadyPact----
No, I don't answer only on questions where I have actual experience. I will occasionally disclaim lack of experience or lack of circumstance but I don't ever represent having done something that I have not. I sometimes post without disclaimer.
Davan

_____________________________

May you live as long as you wish & love as long as you live
-Robert A Heinlein

It's about the person & the bond,not the bondage
-Me

Waiting is

170NZ (Aka:Sex God Du Jour) pts

Jesus,I've ALWAYS been a deviant
-Leadership527,Jeff

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 23

RE: Posting on experience - 12/14/2008 6:32:18 PM

Padriag

Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Which leads Me to My actual questions. When considering responding to a thread, do you post an answer only if you have actual experience on the topic? If you have no experience, do you skip the thread? If you have an opinion on the matter, but no actual experience, do you state in your reply that it is your opinion only and not based on something you have actually done or had as a part of your life? Do you state your opinion without the disclaimer that it is not something that you have participated in yourself?

Most of my advice is based on my own experience, if I don't have any real experience I tend to just skip it and leave it to those who do. Occassionally, I'll skip one because I think my particular bluntness might do more harm than good.

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 24

RE: Posting on experience - 12/14/2008 6:33:57 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

When considering responding to a thread, do you post an answer only if you have actual experience on the topic?

if the post is seeking input from the general label(s) submissive/slave(s), then she self-qualifies as being experienced enough to answer from her perspective, as she is in posession of a submissive personality and chose to submit to another in a Master/slave-based relationship.

quote:

If you have no experience, do you skip the thread?

if they are specifically seeking input from male slaves, or those in a relationship with a Daddy-Dom, for example, this slave tends to skip it, as she doesn't have any perspective to add from that specific view.
...but if the OP is asking for opinions, and not just experienced ones, sometimes this slave will hazard a guess, make a suggestion or request more information...out of curiosity.

quote:

If you have an opinion on the matter, but no actual experience, do you state in your reply that it is your opinion only and not based on something you have actually done or had as a part of your life?

yes.
there might have been a few times this slave didn't, but for the most part, she openly admits her limited experience in an intimate Master/slave based relationship--(the one she is in being her first) and limited knowledge regarding folks' choices of alternative lifestyle relationships in general, including BDSM-related ones(6 years in January), as well.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 25

RE: Posting on experience - 12/14/2008 6:56:46 PM

scottjk

Posts: 335
Joined: 4/18/2005
Status: offline

You know, I've recently learned a very valuable lesson with a similar experience.

I asked a simple question, not asking for an opinion, more of a "Have you seen this? How common is this?" kind of question, and in the next 48 hours it turns into a glorious train wreck. I got my answer (Just the facts, ma'am), and I also got every opinion on the planet, some positive, some negative, and SOME jackass spewing garbage about putting labels on some one, calling everyone on the carpet.

What was once a simple intellectual question is now an emotional cluster-fuck. It's just amazing.
Not only that, but it was actually getting abusive. (Of course, I see a LOT of that.) Of course, I consider thread-jacking abusive as well. It's amazing how many people will turn out to abuse the curious for the sake of their own entertainment.

My lesson? I should know better then to satisfy my curiosity on the message boards.

When I do post, I generally stick to the technical stuff as well, some I've experienced, some I haven't but researched and have a common consensus about a topic. I try to remember to include, "I could be wrong.", in my postings because... well, I COULD!

_____________________________

Thou art fertile ground and I will plant a garden in thee.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 26

RE: Posting on experience - 12/14/2008 10:51:12 PM

utopicus

Posts: 97
Joined: 8/27/2008
Status: offline

Personally I base my answer on what I feel about a topic, rather than on experience (which is practically non-existent). True is that I don't answer to "practical" topics, i.e. those who specifically imply knowledge on the subject, but to those more common-sense.
However, You are right insofar a certain "disclaimer" is required, in case no experience is possessed.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 27

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 12:49:08 AM

Vendaval

Posts: 10297
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
When considering responding to a thread, do you post an answer only if you have actual experience on the topic?
No, because I may ask questions for clarification or link to a book or site with more information or make a joke.

If you have no experience, do you skip the thread?
No, because there may be new information in the thread.

If you have an opinion on the matter, but no actual experience, do you state in your reply that it is your opinion only and not based on something you have actually done or had as a part of your life?
I will say "IMO" or "from my point of view".

Do you state your opinion without the disclaimer that it is not something that you have participated in yourself?
Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

_____________________________

"Beware, the woods at night, beware the lunar light.
So in this gray haze we'll be meating again, and on that
great day, I will tease you all the same."
"WOLF MOON", OCTOBER RUST, TYPE O NEGATIVE

http://KinkMeet.co.uk

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 28

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 3:03:41 AM

silkncarol

Posts: 318
Status: offline

I try to post on threads that i have experience with but sometimes there's nothing new to be added to the postings already made. I like when others give examples of why they feel and think the way they do on a subject. I may not have the same journey as you, but i can appreciate and perhaps learn from your own experiences.....and i prefer those experiences to be real time, not fantasy land cyber world.....

_____________________________

We attract hearts by the qualities we display. We retain them by the qualities we possess.

Shoes can change your life................. Cinderella

(in reply to slavejali)

Post #: 29

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 3:09:18 AM

Lashra

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

I base my replies on my own experience, or if they are asking for an opinion, then I give it. I usually make the statement that this is my OWN opinion and it may not be popular but it is my opinion. Because I know that some of my opinions are not popular but nevertheless I will speak them.

I think most people reply to threads based on their own experience, but then some base their replies on what they have read in books or from websites. Some posted replies are what they are told to post and the writer has no opinion/thought put into it at all.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 30

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 3:20:30 AM

CNJDom

Posts: 186
Joined: 6/6/2006
From: Southern NJ
Status: offline

When I post a comment here on the Message Boards, I go with my gut feelings. First, when I read the original posting thread, if I feel compelled and interested enough from the subject matter, then I'll post a reply. If I'm lost by how the original post is offered, I'll get the feeling to just move on. Secondly, if I have an opinion on the subject, then I'll respond if I feel strongly about it. Thirdly, if I have had experience on something within the subject matter that I feel sharing would be a benefit to someone, then I'll post. If it's a silly post, you may see me respond equally so. Some posts I've seen here, can sometimes be posted to inflame or create an environment that goes counter to my beliefs, and I'll respond to defend or counter this statement that I feel is incorrect or inaccurate to my beliefs. I will ignore a lot of posts that I feel not qualified to contribute to. Why add to something that you don't know about or have experience or interest in? Sometimes I'm intrigued on what the motivator is, and how people are inspired or compelled in their desire to post a threading start. It's a beautiful thing....sometimes needed and immediate with extreme desire. Other times, it's a beautiful display in ignorance or possibly even misguided beliefs. One thing that I try to remind myself is from what someone once wrote and or said: "There are no stupid questions....only stupid answers".

(in reply to silkncarol)

Post #: 31

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 4:50:40 AM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Which leads Me to My actual questions. When considering responding to a thread, do you post an answer only if you have actual experience on the topic? If you have no experience, do you skip the thread? If you have an opinion on the matter, but no actual experience, do you state in your reply that it is your opinion only and not based on something you have actually done or had as a part of your life? Do you state your opinion without the disclaimer that it is not something that you have participated in yourself?

It really depends on what the question asked was, how the question was asked, and specifically what the poster is actually looking for.

I don't generally place a disclaimer in my answers; I try my best to speak from my own experiences and if others can not 'see' that, then I am not going to point it out...just me, but that's how I do things. If I have no experience, then I will speak from a general pov, in which I will state that it is opinion only and not experienced based.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 32

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 7:08:04 AM

bdaile

Posts: 69
Joined: 12/8/2008
Status: offline

Well, since I have virtually no experience, that's definitely not why I post!

I'll post on a thread if I think my response will be in any way helpful, or if it's something I just can't NOT post about. In general I do say that it's just my opinion, but I don't think that's necessary, since really everything we post is our own opinion.

_____________________________

~brittany~

(in reply to slavejali)

Post #: 33

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 7:15:02 AM

IronBear

Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline

Having covered the subject of the OP with my earlier post, I probably should comment that other than my attempting to pass on information based on my personal experience or what I have observed first hand with my mentors/peers, I do have a Machiavellian sense of humour which when it is in full flow I am wont to see something which tickles me and post accordingly. Apparently to some or many it comes across as me being harsh or even cruel. Any who actually know me know that I do not do cruel, harsh, yes not cruel. However when I see a one worded post like in another thread in another forum when someone posted the two words “Small Penis”, I was unable to resist posting “You have one or are you asking for one?” perhaps not seen as humorous but funny in my book. Honestly if people leave themselves so wide open they should expect people like be to jump in boots and all… As well as many really wonderful informative posts I read there is so much humour in CM though much of it is in the darker mood..

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to bdaile)

Post #: 34

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 8:30:06 AM

SirDominic

Posts: 711
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline

I usually post if I think I have an angle on the question that has not been suggested yet. Usually based on my experience, and sometimes on my opinion. If someone has already posted what I was going to say in a comprehensive way, there seems little point in my saying it again, so usually I won't bother.

_____________________________

You teach best what you have lived.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 35

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 9:31:10 AM

submittous

Posts: 345
Joined: 6/12/2004
Status: offline

Everything posted on any board is opinion, there really are no experts and we haven't found the rule book yet either. We tend to post when we have a point of view that hasn't been presented or has been marginalized... but of course our posts are nothing beyond our opinion too.

Bill and Linda

_____________________________

"If you are lucky enough to find a way of life you love, you have to find the courage to live it." John Irving

(in reply to SirDominic)

Post #: 36

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 9:44:14 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

Einstein had no actual experience with much of what he theorized about...

(in reply to submittous)

Post #: 37

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 9:49:47 AM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

Yes and no. In Einstein's day, there was still a small enough physics literature that it was possible to read every single physics article published, every month. Einstein did this, and he had an excellent memory. It's not a stretch to say that he knew "everything." His quote, "Imagination is more important than knowledge," is famous now, and many people use it as an excuse to make things up without bothering to study history or learn from others. But he was coming from a perspective that he knew all there was to know, and it wasn't good enough. That was why imagination was more important.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 38

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 10:17:37 AM

sunshinemiss

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Which leads Me to My actual questions. When considering responding to a thread, do you post an answer only if you have actual experience on the topic? If you have no experience, do you skip the thread? If you have an opinion on the matter, but no actual experience, do you state in your reply that it is your opinion only and not based on something you have actually done or had as a part of your life? Do you state your opinion without the disclaimer that it is not something that you have participated in yourself?

Hi Lady Pact,
Generally speaking I post as the whim strikes me. I will sometimes give kudos to someone who explains something that I've no experience or knowledge of and I will often give my personal experience when I do. As a therapist type, I like to respond in that venue when it is possible. However, my favorite posts (besides the P and ORS section) are when there is a person seeing the absolutes and I get the opportunity to be a voice of balance. I have a time or two put myself out there in a "yes I've done this dastardly thing" kind of way as a form of penance or warning or to help others understand that life is not all black and white and that discretion, compassion, and complexity etc are sometimes preferable.

The great thing about posting is that on a number of occasions I've been able to share some wisdom that I've learned from painful experience and even better - when folks have shared their Truth with me and I've received an "aha" from it.

Well, and there's the flirting too of course...

well wishes to you and yours,
(*tgfka) sunshine

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 39

RE: Posting on experience - 12/15/2008 10:30:56 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

Yes and no. In Einstein's day, there was still a small enough physics literature that it was possible to read every single physics article published, every month. Einstein did this, and he had an excellent memory. It's not a stretch to say that he knew "everything." His quote, "Imagination is more important than knowledge," is famous now, and many people use it as an excuse to make things up without bothering to study history or learn from others. But he was coming from a perspective that he knew all there was to know, and it wasn't good enough. That was why imagination was more important.

He knew what man knew but had no direct experience with sub atomic particles...

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Post #: 40

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Posting on experience

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.188