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Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 7:58:34 AM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		We've all heard terms like pain slut, attention slut, and the like.  Some may relate to some of these and not others.  Others will be able to identify with all the possible ones I might be able to come up with and more. 

Then there's the intensity slut.   This person likely identifies with a great number of the titles, but it really has nothing to do with specifically enjoying those things.  It only when there is high energy and intensity attached to them that they really hold their appeal.  Control is absolute, emotions deep, humiliation utterly complete, pain extreme, etc.  They often will have tags such as extreme, heavy, and the like attached to the terms previously mention.   It is the intensity that drives them, however.

I best identify with this idea of the intensity slut.  Lots of things a very enjoyable to me, but it is the focus and energy behind them that really stirs me.  I could have fun in a light, casual manner, but it is not going to be the same.  I feed off of the energy, focus, and attention of what is going on.  It is those things that make the specific things going on pleasurable to me.

Does anyone else identify this way?  What is it like for you?  I think this can be the case on either side of the whip, so I would really appreciate responses from both sides.

lovingpet   
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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 8:07:48 AM   
maybeyours


Posts: 2
Joined: 12/18/2007
Status: offline 		I'm this way - intensity is very important to me.  It's the depth of the emotions and the connection that really gets me.  It's what leaves me wanting more and more.  Light, casual play just doesn't do it for me.  It scratches the itch for a short while, but it comes back more ... well, intense, lol ... than ever.  

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 8:19:12 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		I can totally see where you are coming from with this concept and agree with it in that i too need intensity in my scenes to get a full high from them. However i would say that if you identify as a pain slut or humiliation slut then the intensity involved in that is a given.
Don't we have enough labels without adding more to the collection lol?

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 8:27:54 AM   
RainydayNE


Posts: 978
Joined: 10/21/2008
Status: offline 		i kinda have to agree with missturbation on this =p the unnecessary lists grow ever longer!
intensity is nice, but i, too, assume it's a given. however i've never "played casually" so maybe i just don't have enough miles to necessarily know the difference.

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 10:13:34 AM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		I never intended this as a label, but more my musing on what exactly it is that I enjoy about things.  It is not always that I enjoy the actual sensations or emotions in an erotic sense.  It is the spirit in which they may be given that matters more.  Take a look see at my posts and I am sure it will be clear I am not one to relish in labels either! :)

lovingpet

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 12:57:58 PM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline 		Honestly, I've been calling myself an intensity addict or intensity slut for years -- topping, bottoming, outside of WIITWD, relationship-wise, in what I read, write, and watch on TV, it's all about the experience, and if it's not high-intensity on -some- level, I'm bored out of my gourd.

In many ways, I think "intensity freak" and "control freak" in combination describe me better than almost any other individual or grouped moniker, including 'dominant', 'top', 'bottom', etc. Sometimes, those labels just don't fit me -- but 'intensity freak/slut/addict' always does.


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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 1:36:19 PM   
Alighierisquest


Posts: 58
Joined: 6/16/2007
Status: offline 		I can see how intensity can become an important fixture.  To me that's the difference between what you can do reasonably all the time and what you can do on special occasions.  I don't know if I could ever play with or over an intensity slut for fearing of being burned out.

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 1:39:11 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I need intensity in terms of emotional connection. But not in any activity. I can enjoy light bondage, light sensation play, etc. But only in a loving, committed relationship.

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 1:45:09 PM   
CallaFirestormBW


Posts: 3651
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Alighierisquest

I can see how intensity can become an important fixture.  To me that's the difference between what you can do reasonably all the time and what you can do on special occasions.  I don't know if I could ever play with or over an intensity slut for fearing of being burned out.


Yup. This is kinda why being poly works well for me -- nobody gets burned out trying to deal with my intensity all by themselves. *LOL*


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***
Said to me recently: "Look, I know you're the "voice of reason"... but dammit, I LIKE being unreasonable!!!!"

"Your mind is more interested in the challenge of becoming than the challenge of doing." Jon Benson, Bodybuilder/Trainer

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 7:33:56 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline 		To be honest, I would be frightened by the person that could actually handle me singlehandedly.  That's not necessarily a bad thing .  It is difficult to create a high intensity level.  It is something that really has to be a compatibility thing.  If a person is naturally high intensity, then it is less of an issue.  Also if the partners are able to honestly assess their ability to meet this need and make the necessary allowances in their relationship for it, the outcome is far better than trying to meet it when you are not able or thinking you will be able to accept it not being met.  Intensity in its best form should not be created... it should just be.

lovingpet

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 8:14:25 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I go the typical route- I am greedy for intense balance. 

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 8:25:29 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline 		I like intensity in general. Sceneing, relationships, recreation, the gym... the downside is I put so much energy into something that I burn out quickly, like a little kid at a amusement park or something. :-/

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 8:44:47 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		Intensity is a rather subject term .   What one consider intense another could very well consider as relaxing or just boring.   It is one thing to say that one desires intensity in their scene... but communicating what exactly is intense is another issue all together.

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/3/2008 9:14:42 PM   
Lilith13


Posts: 20
Joined: 11/2/2008
From: Takoma Park, Maryland
Status: offline 		Heh--it has been said that I approach sex and relationships as an extreme sport. I do use the word "intense" sometimes, though I use the word "extreme" more. But I think we're talking about the same thing. Intensity, depth, focus, etc., are certainly parts of the extreme experiences I crave.

It can take hours or days for us to prepare for a session and enter into it. When we get there we are entirely living it--there isn't anything else calling for our attention. When my domme reaches a hyperfocused state, I know I'm going to be taken away from the rest of the world completely and it's going to be intense.

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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/4/2008 2:40:28 AM   
silkncarol


Posts: 318
Status: offline 		Very true Knight.......it's all relative to your own experience.  Since i don't think of myself as a pain slut i've always liked the term "sensation junkie"....it doesn't have to hurt like hell, but i do need and want that mental and emotional connection with the person i'm with.....

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

Intensity is a rather subject term .   What one consider intense another could very well consider as relaxing or just boring.   It is one thing to say that one desires intensity in their scene... but communicating what exactly is intense is another issue all together.


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RE: Intensity Slut? - 12/4/2008 5:27:44 AM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

Intensity is a rather subject term .   What one consider intense another could very well consider as relaxing or just boring.   It is one thing to say that one desires intensity in their scene... but communicating what exactly is intense is another issue all together.


That is definitely true.  I have seen many "intense" scenes and really it didn't do much for me personally.  I don't even think had I been one of the parties involved it would have mattered.  Intense and blase are entirely in the eye of the beholder and I think for most the activity going on actually does matter.  For me, it simply doesn't.  It is an energy thing.

lovingpet

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