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Luck - 11/8/2008 11:20:04 PM

hermione83

Posts: 393
Joined: 8/1/2007
Status: offline

Out of curiosity, how many of you who are in fact, seeking a permanent relationship from using this site have/have not found it - and how long have you been here (if you've given it a good try). Please don't answer if you're in the process. I'm just curious how many found exactly what they wanted - and how long it took, or those who have been here a while (how long?) and are pretty much giving up on finding on here. Thanks=)

Post #: 1

RE: Luck - 11/8/2008 11:22:21 PM

IAMChristine

Posts: 588
Joined: 11/4/2008
From: Salt Lake City
Status: offline

well, don't know if i'm in the dreaded "process" you speak of....but i've been here almost a year. 2 doms here and i've given it my best whirl and they didn't turn out. i don't blame CM. i'll look again in time, probably here again.

_____________________________

formerly christine1. now i'm better, stronger, faster.

yes i'm pro gun...i'm not going to sit around with a fucking rolling pin and hope for the best.

(in reply to hermione83)

Post #: 2

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 1:13:57 AM

babygirlkitten

Posts: 66
Joined: 10/25/2008
From: Manhattan
Status: offline

When I was looking, I couldn't seem to find what I wanted. I met one submissive, and we had a great time, and then I never heard from them again. So. I suppose it's like any site, hit or miss.

(in reply to IAMChristine)

Post #: 3

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 1:22:09 AM

JustDarkness

Posts: 1461
Joined: 7/25/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: hermione83

Out of curiosity, how many of you who are in fact, seeking a permanent relationship from using this site have/have not found it - and how long have you been here (if you've given it a good try). Please don't answer if you're in the process. I'm just curious how many found exactly what they wanted - and how long it took, or those who have been here a while (how long?) and are pretty much giving up on finding on here. Thanks=)

mmm
last sub was 1 year with me
the slave before that 5 years
(both I met here)
at the moment none

We always started to talk as friends with no expectations at all. No M/s rules from the start...we grew into that. I notice that what I give time, evolves mostly in more serious relations. Either a M/s relation...or friendships.

Imortant is to make finding soemone not a quest. Don't get addicted to it. Keep living..else you get frustrated.
Personally I think it is better to meeting some one on here (the natural way)...then hunt for them by just focus on getting some one. I think you will radiate that eagerness anyway in a bad way. And people don't like pushy people by times.

< Message edited by JustDarkness -- 11/9/2008 1:24:37 AM >

(in reply to hermione83)

Post #: 4

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 1:34:13 AM

susie

Posts: 1699
Joined: 11/21/2004
Status: offline

I found my Master within one day of setting up an ad on another site. Obviously it took a while to work out that he was the right one. I know someone else that has been on a UK site searching for over 8 years so I guess there is no set time for anything to happen.

I would say though that you have put some quite severe restrictions on your search which will limit the pool you are searching in. Reading your profile I am not even sure that you are looking in the right place.

(in reply to JustDarkness)

Post #: 5

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 2:18:16 AM

MidMichCowboy

Posts: 665
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline

I have made some very good friends on-line. Not so successful in much more.
I guess I'm too slow and deliberate. Maybe I share too much on-line (full profile and journal).
People seem to take parts of what I say and then they run like hell.
Maybe I'm just a total nut job or asshole.
I don't have the best situation for a relationship or the greatest location.
But, I deal with it. Maybe someday, I'll find someone who thinks its worth her efforts too.

_____________________________

I want to capture your mind, your spirit, your soul, your body, your devotion and your love. Then, will I give you my heart.

(in reply to susie)

Post #: 6

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 2:48:19 AM

moonvine

Posts: 780
Joined: 11/7/2004
Status: offline

I have been here 4 years. I have found a short term relationship that we were hoping would be long term, but didn't turn out that way, and I'm currently in negotiations with a potential dominant.and who knows what may or may not come of that.

I have taken long hiatuses from the site due to real life intervening.

I would agree based on your profile this may not be the right site for you - I have seen a few young male dominant profiles that stated they were virgins, but you're fishing in an even smaller pond than I am. I believe there are some Christian BDSM sites that might suit you better, but even so, you have a vast number of requirements, and every requirement you throw in leaves some potential people out.

(in reply to hermione83)

Post #: 7

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 3:36:23 AM

shivermetimbers

Posts: 2060
Joined: 6/7/2008
Status: offline

It was 11 years of searching till I found my dearest Deanna. I met her here on CM on my second go around on the site, and I've been on the site for almost two years total.

_____________________________

I love you Deanna, you make every day a better day.

If we descended from monkeys and apes, why are there still monkeys and apes?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZ3CJi0Ih9s&feature=player_embedded

http://www.thebuccozone.com/piratesong.htm

(in reply to hermione83)

Post #: 8

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 4:06:47 AM

pixidustpet

Posts: 857
Joined: 6/4/2008
Status: offline

i met Daddy in march after joining in january of last year, i do believe. TheEngineer i met elsewhere online 9 years ago. i'm still with both,

kitten

(in reply to shivermetimbers)

Post #: 9

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 4:41:04 AM

allthatjaz

Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline

I found a man on here five years ago and ended up living with him for four years. It all ended amicably but I think we reached journeys end together.

I met Stephen on here after meeting a few others that I just knew were not for me. I believed wrongly that Stephen was a fluffy!! just shows that you never really know a person until you get to know them

I have to say that I never want to wait long before meeting someone I have chatted to on a site like this. I think I should possibly be termed a speed dater! Stephen reminded me the other day of how quickly I got our little act together. I just can't be bothered with all the typing and so long as we meet in a safe place (which Stephen and me didn't

) then its no different than being chatted up by a guy in your local bar.

(in reply to pixidustpet)

Post #: 10

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 5:46:12 AM

lally3

Posts: 595
Joined: 3/4/2008
Status: offline

youre profile made me smile. reminded me of me a while ago. coming out with your fists up and all ready for ten rounds in the ring - you wont attract anyone with that profile sweetie, you need to learn to sift and filter and not take the idiots seriously. the more you sound assured and strong in yourself the more youll attract the real deal. read some profiles of people whove been in the lifestyle a while. its catch 22 to start with. youre not totally sure what floats your boat right now. but you must have a general idea, concentrate on that and a more optomisitc attitude.

for me, ive met two people from here. one was a really lovely guy, but apart from getting on well, we didnt connect D/s wise. the other guy is the Sir im with now. all in all since last february. ive met others from other sites and had some fun. but it takes lots of different things to knit before you can honestly feel that youre on your way to something permanent.

holding on to your viginity is commendable, holding on to it for someone genuine will make your search a little longer maybe. personally id take myself out to places. meet people.

_____________________________

even doves have pride (Prince)

(in reply to allthatjaz)

Post #: 11

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 6:14:53 AM

Twicehappy2x

Posts: 1096
Joined: 3/27/2007
Status: offline

Grins, i had a profile here for around two years before i met my owners. We have been a happy threesome for three years.

_____________________________

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to hermione83)

Post #: 12

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 6:16:56 AM

angelspassion4u

Posts: 632
Joined: 7/17/2006
From: Angels
Status: offline

I have been here since July 2006. I have met a few Doms in real life nothing that turned into anything. I have made many friends and value their friendships. I even found a local group that I joined due to one of the friends I have here. I am still looking for the right one to come along but in the mean time I am just going day by day. Chatting with friends, always learning more about our lifestyle, reading the boards, going to the local group munches taking things slow. I am not going to jump into anything right away I have to get to know the person and them to know me first.

_____________________________

Recommends books by Victoria Morris through Pink Flamingo publishers.
"You can PLEASE some people some of the time, most people most of the time, but NEVER all the people all of the time."

(in reply to lally3)

Post #: 13

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 6:23:41 AM

kiwisub12

Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline

I met my Sir on this site within a couple of weeks of putting up a profile. He was the first one to suggest we meet - which obviously - we did, and depending on your point of view, things went down hill from there.lol.

We met at Barnes and Nobles (bookstore), had coffee (hot chocolate) and talked about pretty much everything in the human spectrum. It was enough to reassure me that we would have enough in common to have a relationship that included bdsm, not just BE bdsm. There were things i was dubious about, but were more cosmetic in nature than intrinsic to his personality.

I pretty much moved in with him after the second time at his house, much to the disgust of my adult um - she lost her chief cook and bottle washer! And i have been extremely happy ever since. Who knew two people could be so gaga about each other for so long?
It will be three years come January, and there are times when it feels as if we have been together forever, and times it feels as if we have just met.

In the words of a famous poet - "Ain't love lovely!"

(in reply to lally3)

Post #: 14

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 6:23:59 AM

MmeGigs

Posts: 706
Joined: 1/26/2008
Status: offline

I met my hubby in 1999 through another kinky personals site. I was there for about 2 years before he found me, and dated about a dozen fellows I met there before I met him. He was on the site for a few months when he found me. I was his first date from there. We've been married 7 1/2 years now and still feel pretty honey-mooney.

When I met him, I was seriously contemplating relocating to Mpls/St Paul. I'm no good at all at long distance relationships and wasn't meeting anyone nearby, so I figured I had to go where there were more possibilities. I'm glad he found me before that happened.

(in reply to hermione83)

Post #: 15

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 6:34:01 AM

chamberqueen

Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline

I joined just over a year ago as a Domme. I had some real time subs that I met with within the next month. I was not looking for a relationship at the time, only sessions.

By the end of last November I was looking to explore my submissive side. Within two weeks I found a Master who I was interested in. We met in person not long after and have now been together for almost a year. I have also become friends with another female slave, and even though we've never met in person we stay in daily contact.

I don't think I would use the word "luck", but I do feel very fortunate that it did not take me long to find a compatible person. I did not settle by any means; he has led me through more emotional healing than anyone I've ever been with. We are a very good match and it is the best relationship of my life.

I think that the keys were that we were both ready, I was not desperate to find someone - just exploring possibilities, and we started building a friendship before we ever met in person and have continued to keep that as the base of our relationship.

_____________________________

(in reply to MmeGigs)

Post #: 16

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 7:36:17 AM

innocentgirl15

Posts: 9
Joined: 7/4/2008
Status: offline

Well, I'm not sure if I'm in the process, but I've been on various sites (inculding here) for around about a year and a month. I've found a few great people to play with, but nothing more perminant, as I've really wanted, unfortunatly. It's definatly a case of good fortune to find just the right person, with similar kinks, not too far away, and who's looking for a LTR or short term play, whichever you're after.

(in reply to chamberqueen)

Post #: 17

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 7:43:19 AM

SirDominic

Posts: 711
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline

I have been on this site for about four years. Two under my current profile, the rest with an older profile I eventually got dissatisfied with and deleted. I have met a number of people through Collar, and, unfortunately none of them resulted in a relationship. Frankly, it has been my experience that the people I meet on here are all a bit flaky (or worse). Maybe just the "luck" of the draw.

Of all my previous subs, we met in person, at an event, brunch, play party, etc. I met my current slave on a different site, which I actually rarely checked.

_____________________________

You teach best what you have lived.

(in reply to hermione83)

Post #: 18

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 7:47:09 AM

SunNMoon

Posts: 1058
Joined: 3/18/2007
Status: offline

I've been on here almost for two years (in March). I started here for the boards when I was in a relationship. After that relationship ended it was around 6 months before I was in a new one. It didn't work out how I'd hope since I'm back looking again. But I've met a lot of really nice people, and I haven't given up looking at all.

_____________________________

"We agreed to S&M only, sex and mockery." - Gray’s Anatomy.

(in reply to SirDominic)

Post #: 19

RE: Luck - 11/9/2008 7:53:40 AM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

I met my Master/Husband here on CM. I honestly don't remember how long I'd had a profile before it happened but I'm guessing 6 - 8 months approximately. I was NOT looking for anything serious and hadn't come close to even finding it accidentally until He contacted me.

We lived 800 miles apart but made an instant online then phone connection. Six weeks later I drove to AR for a week's vacation and a little over a year later, had permenantly relocated to Him.

We were married this past May and we both feel utterly blessed. I thank CM for being available as a way for us to know the other existed. I don't like thinking how it would've been to go the entire rest of my life without Him

luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to hermione83)

Post #: 20

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