RE: Do you know you?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Do you know you?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Do you know you?

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 8:39:35 AM

SlayerZ

Posts: 100
Joined: 3/28/2005
Status: offline

I would most certainly state that I know myself very well indeed.

Life is a journey, life is a non-stop roller-coaster of self-discovery and self-awareness. Would I say that I know everything of whom I am? Absolutely not. I don't think you can ever stop learning more about yourself, doesn't matter the degree of the leaning. But I would certainly confirm that I know myself more than some people know themselves. I'm an introspective and very thought-filled man, I always have been. Even from a very early age I asked myself "why" and "how" and I've always been curious about what makes me tick, not only that, I've also been curious about what makes other people tick. I suppose that's why I'm a published writer (author, soo, oh very soon) I have an innate question bubble in my head, I like to know why, where, who, which and huh?

The more that you know yourself the more self-assured and more confident you will ultimately be. So saying that, I would consider myself extremely confident and self-assured.

As I said previously; self-discovery is a non-stop journey, which only stops when you pass away... or does It?

(in reply to agirl)

Post #: 21

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 9:08:45 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

I actually do know myself. I know my in's and out's, and every twist and turn that brought me to this point in my life. Does that mean I have mastered something? Not in my opinion. I know why I do things, it does not stop me from doing them.
On the other hand, I have mastered some things. I raised my children to be honest, respectful, and decent. I have skills beyond those of a layman in many things.
But am I a master? No.
I am someone who does things well. And someone who needs another to make me see more value in who and what I am. Plus all people who are not spuds will evolve over time. I have changed, I expect further changes. I do not want to stop learning, or to become one of those old ladies who believes everything they read. When you stop learning you stagnate.
On a personal note I would never choose a man who identified as master, largely because as someone stated early on, he can also be a moron who owns a slave.
Give me a man who knows who he is and does not need the validation of a title HE creates and that is a man I might spend some time with.
Kyst

< Message edited by Missokyst -- 10/9/2008 9:30:43 AM >

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 22

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 9:27:21 AM

ShiftedJewel

Posts: 2492
Joined: 12/2/2004
Status: offline

I know me. Better then I would like to most of the time. I know my limitations, I know my fears and flaws. I know that I love too deeply and too easily and I also know that I'm gonna get hurt because of that and it's ok. And I also know that I don't have a clue who I'll be in five years. I'm not the same me that was around ten years ago and I knew that me really well too. I love being surprised at how much I grow and change even at 50 years old.

Jewel

_____________________________

Don't ask, trust me, you won't like the answer... no one ever does.

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 23

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 9:33:22 AM

WinsomeDefiance

Posts: 6719
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline

I don't think I always know myself. Just when I start to think that I do, something new surprises me about myself.

(in reply to sailorfrank)

Post #: 24

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 9:35:00 AM

sunshinemiss

Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline

What LaT and CD said.

Master in this is an action verb. It is about control of oneself first. Finding weaknesses and ways to strengthen them or work around them.

And for the nitpicky dictionary mongers...let's not limit the lovely language, ok?

here's a couple phrasals...
To be master of one's self, to have entire self-control; not to be governed by passion.

To be one's own master, to be at liberty to act as one chooses without dictation from anybody.

and a verb

1.
be or become completely proficient or skilled in; "She mastered Japanese in less than two years"

2.
get on top of; deal with successfully; "He overcame his shyness" [syn: overcome]

3.
have dominance or the power to defeat over; "Her pain completely mastered her"; "The methods can master the problems" [syn: dominate]

4.
have a firm understanding or knowledge of; be on top of; "Do you control these data?"

From sunshine, grammar goddess extraordinaire

_____________________________

Yes, I am a wonton hussy... and still sweet as 3.14

(in reply to ShiftedJewel)

Post #: 25

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 9:42:06 AM

akisha

Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline

~FR~

I don't think that knowing everything about yourself is the important thing to focus on, for we can not really know everything about anything.

The important thing is to be able to accept yourself for who you are and not beat yourself up for things you feel you fail at. Instead either accept that you have flaws and move on or try to work with them and over come them.

If you can atleast look at yourself honestly and accept what you see or work to change what you don't like then on the whole you will be much better off.

In my opinion anyway *S*

We are all fallible, but to be able to admit your flaws and be honest with yourself is the key to being able to better understand yourself.

_____________________________

I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to sailorfrank)

Post #: 26

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 10:52:11 AM

Jeptha

Posts: 780
Joined: 9/18/2008
From: Portland, Oregon
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin
... the question really is how well do we ever know ourselves, does anyone here think that they truely do?

Yes and no.

One of the main things that I pay attention to is whether I'm happy or not.
If not, I try to explore why not.
That's my barometer.
If I'm unhappy, then there probably are unanswered questions and things that need to be examined and questions that need to be asked, and perhaps changes that need to be made.

I've experienced a fair amount of life. I have some variety of experience. I know myself to some degree. But I always reserve the right (and grant the same to others) to change my mind, or have my mind changed. I try to be introspective. But things change constantly. The world is not static. I am not impervious to influence. Sometimes two old things combined make one new one. If nothing else, time itself goes by. There's always the possibility, at any time, of something new turning up in the ole psyche in relation to this.

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 27

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 10:54:34 AM

subtee

Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< Um hmm, that's me right over there

_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to Jeptha)

Post #: 28

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 12:20:48 PM

persephonee

Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline

The one thing i learned about myself, i learned in the 9th grade in geometry class. Every time i knew...knew the answer was...X....i was wrong. i am sometimes a rigid thinker and every time i know im absolutely right..can feel it in my cells...im dead wrong.
Every time i feel that way, i examine the issue and look for ways that i went awry.
i was just convinced of something the other day....a limitation i thought i had in a personal way...i was proven wrong again....grrrr.

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to subtee)

Post #: 29

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 1:17:03 PM

silkncarol

Posts: 318
Status: offline

I like to think i'm self-aware and introspective concerning my actions, decisions and the choices i make. Sometimes the awareness has come in hindsight....but isn't that what life is? If you're going to grow and evolve emotionally and mentally, you take those life experiences and learn from them.... i never want to stop learning about myself.......there are times i'm still surprised.

_____________________________

We attract hearts by the qualities we display. We retain them by the qualities we possess.

Shoes can change your life................. Cinderella

(in reply to SlayerZ)

Post #: 30

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 1:38:58 PM

tactileartist

Posts: 36
Joined: 12/9/2006
Status: offline

To say that I know me would indicate to me that I'm a 'thing' or a 'task' - the way I know my bookshelf & what's on it, or the way I know how to cast an astrology chart.

I am not a thing. I am not a task. I am not my mind, my body, my personality... or even the sum of those things. I am an adventure, and I will continue to be an adventure until my adventure comes to it's completion.

(in reply to silkncarol)

Post #: 31

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 2:35:39 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Trying to reach an ideal before you work with it's defining tenets will never lead to anything. You are defeated before you even start. Expecting everything to be perfect, even the mastery of yourself, before you begin is, in my opinion, a ludicrous idea. It's like waiting for all the traffic lights to be green all at once before starting to drive across town. It will just never happen...not will they all STAY green.

It seems your Master has issues with not being perfect. How's that working for him?

Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water.

Master Fire

< Message edited by MasterFireMaam -- 10/9/2008 2:38:21 PM >

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 32

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 2:39:26 PM

stella41b

Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline

It was like a headache, not quite a throbbing, more a dull ache. But there were no painkillers. No cure. It's something you wake up with, and something which stays with you until you go to sleep at night. Then there's a paralysis. Yes you can move, you can walk, you can run, jump, reach out and touch things, but nothing and nobody can reach you. It's all meant for this other person. You try to be that other person but you can't. But all people see is that other person, they don't see you. They don't pay any attention to you, they ignore you and focus on this other person. When they say 'I love you' they really mean they love the other person, they do things to make that other person happy and you don't feel it. That other person gets everything, you get nothing.

And so you speak out, if only to make someone listen. They hear you, but they don't understand. They refuse to understand, they don't know you, they don't accept you, they don't even like you. Some even hate you. And so you retreat, and they start to notice the other person again. There are times you feel alone, you feel so lonely, you don't feel love, you never really feel happiness, only when and if you try to fool yourself and convince yourself that you're that other person. But you're not. And so you try to get by, without feeling any love, without feeling any happiness, unless of course you pretend, no tenderness, no warmth, unless of course you pretend.

You lie awake at night, in bed, staring at the ceiling. Is this me? Is it them? Why is it this way? Why am I like I am? Why don't people understand? More to the point, why don't I understand? Is this really me? Or am I the other person, but only fooling myself? But what if they are right, and I am wrong? What is the truth? Is the truth nothing more than a whole serie3s of impressions, feelings, emotions? What if there is no truth? What if there is only what I perceive to be the truth? Isn't that the case? The truth doesn't exist, but only how we perceive it? So what chance have I got of knowing the truth? Who am I? Why has this happened to me? Oh why was I ever born?

Twenty six years, give or take a season or two. Twenty six years of having these thoughts inside my head, every day, all day, secretly, but for much of the time trying to be that other person and failing. Twenty six years of not knowing who I was, of not having any clear identity, of not being myself because I didn't know what 'myself meant', but somehow just trying to fit in. Twenty six years of doubting, not trusting, not believing, of not being sure until certain questions have been answered, and of finding that the answers to those questions were still more questions.

Being transgendered is wonderful for introspection and getting to know yourself. It's good for learning to look at things from a whole range of different perspectives. It's like being left alone in a fancy dress shop, each outfit is a new persona, a new character, and there are three or four rails of so many personas and characters to choose from. But which one fits?

But there is a happy ending. This is me, I am Stella, and I am writing this as myself, I know who I am and I know who I am not. My life has been a transient one, a sort of voyage of self-discovery, but also a discovery of other people and of life, a sort of adventure, and this is an adventure I live on a day to day basis. I can even come out with things like Sun in Cancer on the cusp of Leo, rising Virgo Moon, Neptune in Scorpio trine Saturn in Pisces and trine Jupiter in Cancer - not that it makes a lot of sense to many people.

I am 42 years old and also 15 years old again, the hormones are kicking in and I'm experiencing puberty a second time round, and through trial and error, question and answer, failures and successes, misunderstandings, heartaches, discoveries, I have come to know myself, and what is more I am coming out of myself.

That other person died some time ago, and it was like part of me died along with him, or - if I'm going to be honest, I killed him, and I killed him with a sorty of sadistic glee which I have never experienced before and I never will again. Transgender really does mean transgender, it's not just the boobs (yes, I still try to suck my nipples in the bathroom) the hormones or the surgery, but you also have to change who you are inside, deep inside, and also your whole perspective.

I am still changing, I am a work in progress, but I am me, the person and the sum total of my experiences. I know who I am today, I have a good idea of tomorrow, but a few months is just too far away.

This is the positive side of being transgendered, you get to know yourself, you get to see things from so many different perspectives. A lot of people think you're nuts or eccentric, but in going from one gender to the other a little bit remains and I sometimes wonder whether you get to transcend gender as a whole. At least that is how it seems sometimes.

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to SlayerZ)

Post #: 33

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 2:50:03 PM

persephonee

Posts: 5089
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline

At the risk of appearing like a stalker...meh...who cares...im totally stalking you Stella.

i look for your posts and read what you share and simply adore you.

perse.

_____________________________

You be the Captain; i'll be no one.

And You can carry me away....if You want to. ~Kasey Chambers

E*Whore, extraordinaire....

Nothing is exactly as it seems~Nor, is it otherwise.

(in reply to stella41b)

Post #: 34

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 4:27:27 PM

bound4more

Posts: 128
Joined: 10/3/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

Ok ive been thinking, the Dominant I am with has always said he wouldnt refer to himself as Master because that word implies that there is nothing left to learn. Life is about learning therefore one would hope we never run out of things.

As he refers to me as slave people tend to assume that is what he calls himself which is fair enough I would too. Recently somone said to him "to be a Master you must first Master yourself" now within the prior context how easy is it for someone to be a Master. Can we ever truely Master ourselves? Surely that means knowledge of oneself but how much do we really know who we are? I am young so its obvious that I dont but I have known people far older that still admit to not knowing. For example my father is 55 and he always says "well I still dont know what I want to do with my life"

Really I guess this isnt a question about BDSM and it isnt a what does Master mean question I know that many people will disagree with the above definition the question really is how well do we ever know ourselves, does anyone here think that they truely do? Or more interestingly how many people think that they dont? I would be intrigued to see if anyone admits the latter.

Ahhhh - just when I thought I had me all figured out, dang - I went and learned something new.

_____________________________

You can tell who someone really is by how they act

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 35

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 4:47:06 PM

SlaveIndigochild

Posts: 272
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

Ok ive been thinking, the Dominant I am with has always said he wouldnt refer to himself as Master because that word implies that there is nothing left to learn. Life is about learning therefore one would hope we never run out of things.

As he refers to me as slave people tend to assume that is what he calls himself which is fair enough I would too. Recently somone said to him "to be a Master you must first Master yourself" now within the prior context how easy is it for someone to be a Master. Can we ever truely Master ourselves? Surely that means knowledge of oneself but how much do we really know who we are? I am young so its obvious that I dont but I have known people far older that still admit to not knowing. For example my father is 55 and he always says "well I still dont know what I want to do with my life"

Really I guess this isnt a question about BDSM and it isnt a what does Master mean question I know that many people will disagree with the above definition the question really is how well do we ever know ourselves, does anyone here think that they truely do? Or more interestingly how many people think that they dont? I would be intrigued to see if anyone admits the latter.

Stating if one is (or is not) a master and then justifying that position is an example of putting the cart before the horse. Neither the cart or the horse goes anywhere. Working with labels in this way (and any attempts to make agree conclusions) fails because it is a form of syllogism.
Too tired to write more but just enough energy to say:
The syllogism is at the core of deductive reasoning, where facts are determined by combining existing statements, in contrast to inductive reasoning where facts are determined by repeated observations…..
from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Syllogism
i watch Master and wonder all day long.i wonder what it is like to master me....i wonder why? does he need to ? Does he want to? Who is the me that he is mastering? 'cos there''s a point sometimes between us when the 'me' and the 'Him' meld and become as one.
Is it quantuum? Are we forever changed? Are we together? Are we separate? Who was i before he was my master? Who will i be when we inevitable transcend this life?
i am a twin. Who is she? Am i still the other half of her? An i whole when we are apart? Am i whole when we are together? Am i mother, sister, slave, writer, friend, teacher, therapist, above all am i this ego-bound self? Am i who i believe myself to be? Or do i ask others who i am?
Let's hope i am who i believe myself to be on an up day. Will this me remain after my body falls away? Or will my consciousness die when my time is done? Am i my recollections, will i be what i need to be, or will i become what master wants me to become? Are they the same?
Sometimes i am afraid to sleep. Where does this me go when 'i' am sleeping?
i am existentially both an object in itself and an awareness able to ask all of these question.
Each day i wonder.........

< Message edited by SlaveIndigochild -- 10/9/2008 5:00:26 PM >

_____________________________

Formerly Prinsexx
_________________________

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=iIUrLpvE3Rk&feature=related

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 36

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 6:05:55 PM

peacelili

Posts: 29
Joined: 2/15/2008
Status: offline

quote:

does anyone here think that they truely do? Or more interestingly how many people think that they dont? I would be intrigued to see if anyone admits the latter.

quote:

ORIGINAL: colouredin

i would have to answer yes to both questions...i have taken much time in the last five years to 'know' myself, learn who i am and why...but to know what i will be tomorrow i can only guess...and hope that what i have built today offers a foundation to the choices i will make tomorrow...

peacefully
lili

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 37

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 6:33:11 PM

elleRT

Posts: 28
Joined: 1/30/2005
Status: offline

I could not have said it better myself :) Nothing is a waste in learning if it adds to the person you will become. Even if you learn something out of boredom, or made to learn something you think it is not important, it has made you that much of a better person than before.

(in reply to sailorfrank)

Post #: 38

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 7:50:14 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

I've been in and out of therapy for fully half of my life. Comes from being fourth generation mood disorder with the disorder coming on 30 years prior to the development of SSRIs. All there ever was, was talk therapy. Well ECT existed but the side effects were such it wasn't used if you weren't long term hospitalized.

I'm as self aware as I want to be. Any more and nothing would ever be something to look forward to.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to elleRT)

Post #: 39

RE: Do you know you? - 10/9/2008 8:03:23 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

I think this kind of thinking is self defeating or more specifically, you are concerning yourself with things that are really beyond your control to some extent or another.

I break it down like this...

I know who I am and what I know right now and will make the best decisions possible based off of that.
Tomorrow I will probably learn new things about life or myself and use that information to make even better decisions.
I will inevitably make mistakes and bad decisions. It's inescapable and unavoidable. They will provide new information to avoid the mistake or make a better decision in the future.
One can only really say they have achieved complete self mastery when they have achieved a god-like state of perfection. This is impossible so therefore the end of the journey is not important, but the journey itself is.
Whether or not I am qualified or not qualified to Master someone is completely subjective to opinion and therefore really irrelevant to think about. All that is important is I keep working on my weak points and growing to do a better job at it tomorrow and the next day.

_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to colouredin)

Post #: 40

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Do you know you?

Page: << < prev 1 [2] 3 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.141