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RE: submission - 9/20/2008 4:53:58 PM   
natasha66


Posts: 321
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: NJ
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

Yes i agree.  It is sad though that sometimes doms seem to be shaken by the sub having a strong personality.   I can't count the number of times a dom has said to me 'you aren't a real sub'  just because i have an opinion.


LMAO....i wouldn't be really being "me" without expressing myself.  That being said, i do try to "mean what I say but not say it mean".  Like it or leave me alone.  Submissive, definitely - doormat, no.

< Message edited by natasha66 -- 9/20/2008 4:58:15 PM >


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Collared June 4th, 2008
Love is giving him the power to destroy you, but trusting him not to.



(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: submission - 9/20/2008 4:57:02 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint

quote:

although subs who are meek and quiet and do everything they are told without question, have every right to be so, it doesn't mean that those who are not so meek are trying to top from the bottom, it simply means they need to find the dom one step up from them to put them in their place.


You probably won't understand how I felt as I read your words. 

So...since you are a tough cookie, you feel you need the domlier Dominant.  Those who aren't as strong willed as you can settle for those Dominants who need not be so domly.  Sounds rather like Darwin's therory....you, being the strongest submissive will attract those domly Doms, those Doms who are one step up from ordinary and that match your superiority. 



This was exactly my point.  Chemistry is what is important.  Just because someone has the ability to command my submission does not mean that the dominant is somehow superior to others.  It means we are a good fit for each other. 

I find absolutely no fault with putting forth all the effort necessary to find the right person and not just a warm body with a whip.  No one is forced to behave one way or another.  The person's style and presence speaks to me and my way of submitting arouses their ardour.  It is really that simple when and only when compatible people interact.

lovingpet

Oh, and thank you Lockit for saying what I was too kind to say.

(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: submission - 9/20/2008 4:58:23 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline
lol I am kind to those who are kind... but mean enough to say what I think when someone is not kind.

(in reply to lovingpet)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: submission - 9/20/2008 5:11:05 PM   
Roselaure


Posts: 672
Joined: 4/12/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint

quote:

although subs who are meek and quiet and do everything they are told without question, have every right to be so, it doesn't mean that those who are not so meek are trying to top from the bottom, it simply means they need to find the dom one step up from them to put them in their place.


You probably won't understand how I felt as I read your words. 

So...since you are a tough cookie, you feel you need the domlier Dominant.  Those who aren't as strong willed as you can settle for those Dominants who need not be so domly.  Sounds rather like Darwin's therory....you, being the strongest submissive will attract those domly Doms, those Doms who are one step up from ordinary and that match your superiority. 

Why don't you just say it like it is?  You are a bratty submissive and rather than submit gracefully, you prefer to be forced into showing your submission.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with your kink.  It also does not make it necessary for you to have the stepped up version of a Dominant.  In a way you are topping from the bottom.  You want and search for that Dominant who will force the submission out of you and in being that way you wish to force the Dominant into acting in a certain way.  A Dominant who expects you to be submissive because that is your nature will not understand why you wish to fight your submission and him.  That does not make him a step lower than you, it just makes him a Dominant who expects his submissive to submit to his will. 

As to opening yourself to hurt when you trust another who does not deserve it...well, that is life.  Those things happen and it shows how strong we are when we can stand up straight, laugh at the a**holes we allowed in our lives, and go on and live a full, productive, and happy life despite them. 


I seem to fall into both categories.  I am by all accounts both strong willed and opinionated.  However, to my Dominant I submit gracefully, cheerfully, and without question. Why can't a girl be both?

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Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul.
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(in reply to peppermint)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: submission - 9/20/2008 5:23:45 PM   
lovingpet


Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Roselaure

quote:

ORIGINAL: peppermint

quote:

although subs who are meek and quiet and do everything they are told without question, have every right to be so, it doesn't mean that those who are not so meek are trying to top from the bottom, it simply means they need to find the dom one step up from them to put them in their place.


You probably won't understand how I felt as I read your words. 

So...since you are a tough cookie, you feel you need the domlier Dominant.  Those who aren't as strong willed as you can settle for those Dominants who need not be so domly.  Sounds rather like Darwin's therory....you, being the strongest submissive will attract those domly Doms, those Doms who are one step up from ordinary and that match your superiority. 

Why don't you just say it like it is?  You are a bratty submissive and rather than submit gracefully, you prefer to be forced into showing your submission.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with your kink.  It also does not make it necessary for you to have the stepped up version of a Dominant.  In a way you are topping from the bottom.  You want and search for that Dominant who will force the submission out of you and in being that way you wish to force the Dominant into acting in a certain way.  A Dominant who expects you to be submissive because that is your nature will not understand why you wish to fight your submission and him.  That does not make him a step lower than you, it just makes him a Dominant who expects his submissive to submit to his will. 

As to opening yourself to hurt when you trust another who does not deserve it...well, that is life.  Those things happen and it shows how strong we are when we can stand up straight, laugh at the a**holes we allowed in our lives, and go on and live a full, productive, and happy life despite them. 


I seem to fall into both categories.  I am by all accounts both strong willed and opinionated.  However, to my Dominant I submit gracefully, cheerfully, and without question. Why can't a girl be both?


That's the beauty of it all!  One can be both.  All that is needed is the right two or more people interacting together.

lovingpet

(in reply to Roselaure)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: submission - 9/20/2008 6:06:56 PM   
greeneyedreamer


Posts: 442
Joined: 6/20/2007
Status: offline
I agree with most of what has been said. The right Dom for you can handle your strong side. It's weaker ones who have the problem. I found one who understands the strong me in work and life and the weaker me in private... I believe it's a matter of time for you. A realtor once said there is a lid for every pot... LOL could be a dom for every submissive...


Good luck and Best Wishes in finding the correct ONE for you!

Dreamer

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I am still learning... Michelangelo, age 87

Maybe some women weren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they are suppose to run wild until they find someone just as wild to run with. Sex and the City

(in reply to persephonee)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: submission - 9/20/2008 9:34:55 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: masterforRT

I believe in the concept of streaks.



Does this mean you enjoy running around naked in public places?

Apologies but I'm just applying your logic for what you argue about switches.

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(in reply to masterforRT)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: submission - 9/21/2008 11:47:49 AM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

quote:

ORIGINAL: RealSub58

Yes , a woman with a strong personality needs a strong controlling D type and thus intimidatd doms might says "you are not submissive." That is their boundary...doesnt mean he is right or you are wrong for being waht Icall a bitch.

Politeness and respect to a stranger is as important online as it is in meeting a stranger on the street.  That's JMHO. 


I am not a bitch. 
I am not obnoxious...i am not superior...and don't come across as being rude when i chat, so there is no reason for their response other than their insecurities i guess as you say.


OMG....I did not say this to imply you !! Please forgive me, I agologize as you took it wrong !
 
I meant in generality, within contect of my WHOLE prior post.
 
I did not mean to imply you were any of these just because you a strong woman.   
 
Once again my apologies.

(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: submission - 9/21/2008 12:05:40 PM   
greeneyes600


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline
RealSub58... ..certainly no offence taken.  No apology necessary. x

In response to those who feel the need to attack ...my response is that you couldn't be further from the truth.  I am not a bratty submissive, far from it, i am quiet and shy.  And by saying i wanted the one who could control me mentally and was one step ahead, it's the strong quiet dom i seek.  The one who can control with a look...and buckle my legs.

It's a shame that this media is so one dimentional....so the readers do not get to see the personality of the one who writes.  You can't seek the cogs going round....or the grin when something is said tongue in cheek...or the sadness when insulted....but that's life and i would like to thank all of you who have taken the trouble to respond, i do very much value your replies.  Thank you.


(in reply to RealSub58)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: submission - 9/21/2008 12:05:42 PM   
E2Sweet


Posts: 649
Joined: 7/8/2008
From: TopLeftCornerOf, OH, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: masterforRT

...This also explains away switches, which I believe do not exist-at least not within the realm of normal, non-skizophrenic behavior.


That conclusion would be.... incorrect.

Perhaps instead of slapping a "you have a mental illness" stamp on switches, you'd instead try to accept that there indeed are people out there who can and do enjoy D/s from both sides of the slash. It's really not all that complex of a concept, in my opinion, and it would better reflect the reality of being switch-y...


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E2Sweet
"If it doesn't make you smile then chances are you're not doing it right."

(in reply to masterforRT)
Profile   Post #: 30
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