Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: restraint


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: restraint Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 1:36:41 PM   
masterforRT


Posts: 176
Joined: 5/16/2008
Status: offline 		This is like asking: "Should I make steak or chicken for dinner"?  If you like them both, what's the difference?

Of course, you could be a vegetarian, and not like meat. Here that would make you vanilla! 

(in reply to NormalOutside)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 1:39:32 PM   
Raechard


Posts: 3513
Joined: 3/10/2007
From: S.E. London U.K.
Status: offline 		Well steak usually takes longer to eat due to the extra chewing involved but chicken is always easy to chew IMHO.

_____________________________

えへまにんへえや
Nobody wants to listen to the same song over and over again!

(in reply to masterforRT)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 1:44:20 PM   
greeneyes600


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline 		I agree NormalOutside....and that control was erxactly my point.  The sub shouldn't have any control...once handed over then there should be no control...for me that is.

(in reply to NormalOutside)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 1:52:46 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

I agree NormalOutside....and that control was erxactly my point.  The sub shouldn't have any control...once handed over then there should be no control...for me that is.


I control the ability to be still when he commands it.  He has the authority to make me control my movements.

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 1:58:38 PM   
greeneyes600


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline 		I stay still because i want to please him....

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:00:48 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

I stay still because i want to please him....

But if you have "no control" how do you manage to stay still?

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:01:53 PM   
Raechard


Posts: 3513
Joined: 3/10/2007
From: S.E. London U.K.
Status: offline 		Anyone with true authority wouldn't need to punish anyone, no? Isn't this just a game people who like kinky activities play to find a deeper meaning that isn't there?

Answer Yes = I'm a bottom

Answer no = I'm deluded

_____________________________

えへまにんへえや
Nobody wants to listen to the same song over and over again!

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:02:40 PM   
greeneyes600


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline 		wanting to please your master isn't about your control...its about submission in my view

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:04:50 PM   
Aileen1968


Posts: 6062
Joined: 12/12/2007
From: I miss Shore, New Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

wanting to please your master isn't about your control...its about submission in my view


So is standing there unrestrained, unmoving because he said so.

_____________________________



(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:10:17 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

I agree NormalOutside....and that control was erxactly my point.  The sub shouldn't have any control...once handed over then there should be no control...for me that is.


I know that you've asked this in the form of a question but as the thread progresses it would seem that you have a pretty well set idea of what "should" be and it would also seem like maybe you were just really wanting some validation for you position on it. I perved your profile and from it I gather that you are pretty new at putting this stuff into practice. If you really want to find out how you feel on this I might suggest you try an experiement to see how the two different circumstances make you feel. Try going through a really tough scene with a dominant...one that makes you feel like you just really can't take it anymore, one that triggers your body's own fight or flight mechanism....do this fully restrained. Then ask if you can repeat that same scene with the same level of intensity totally unrestrained. That way you can figure out which one makes you feel more submissive. It's pretty difficult to make a judgment on it one way or the other until you have experienced both and can compare them.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:13:25 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		If I am unrestrained and told to stay in a position, then I can't take very much at all and I don't get aroused. I spend my whole time monitoring my position and worrying.

Restraints allow me to relax and feel, as opposed to think.

There is no right answer here. Restraints work for some and don't work for others.
Plus of course, for plenty of us the restraints are the main event.

I'm into bondage, I'm not into pain. He's into bondage and not into much pain. Bondage by itself for us is extremely sexually arousing. We do bondage because it turns us on.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to CalifChick)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:13:33 PM   
catize


Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

wanting to please your master isn't about your control...its about submission in my view


 
My perspective is that I better be in control of myself if I’m going to submit to his authority. 


_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:16:44 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		Do you see the contradiction between these posts:
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600
I stay still because i want to please him....


quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600
wanting to please your master isn't about your control...its about submission in my view


and this one?
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600
It's the subs power which makes her stay put...albeit because she wants to submit...whereas when bound it's because he says so...and therefore she has no choice in the matter.   


_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:21:32 PM   
greeneyes600


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline 		Thanks for that Mistoferin.  I am not 'new' to this...but there is lots i haven't tried yet.  I have been subjected to both ways and like both ways.   

It was a thought running through my head and following discussions with others, who obviously all have their own take on it, i see both sides.

I reckon as most say there isn't an either/or, it's more what your dom wants that counts.  It was purely to see what others understanding of it was and so i posted it.  Call it ramblings in my head if you like...but isn't that how most come to understanding their feelings by getting others points of view?

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:24:51 PM   
greeneyes600


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline 		no contradiction at all....i was asking if the sub staying put gave her power.....thats all.  For me personally standing still is o please.  Yet it still could be seen as having power and control because she is in control of that situation.  Like i said in previous reply to you...i am not stating there is a right or wrong...i am opening a debate....

But thank you for your responses.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:26:25 PM   
greeneyes600


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline 		yep catize....... me too

(in reply to catize)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:29:32 PM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

wanting to please your master isn't about your control...its about submission in my view


Try this on and muddle it in your brain ~~ wanting to please and serve is about the submissive.  Control is assumed and given to the dominant.  That is the exchange.
 
Maybe we say the same thing different ways?

(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:37:22 PM   
greeneyes600


Posts: 47
Joined: 9/16/2008
Status: offline 		I reckon you might be right   I've got a headache now!!

(in reply to RealSub58)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:38:36 PM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

Should a submissive be restrained to take what their master wants them to take?

It totally depends on the exchange dynamic.  I have never been restrained.  The control of HIS being is restraint enough.

I can see the point of the sub standing to take what's given, without movement, without a sound....but then it's the sub who has the power...over herself.
NO... there a reason she is silent and has no movement ..the control of his mind and person.

If she is retsrained, immobilised, then the restrainer is the one with the power, over her. He decides she isn't to move, he decides she stays there until he is finished with her.

There is a gigantic canvernous different between her willingness to submit to his power/control and the control he assumes.... until he is finished...in a play scene.

My view only of course...what do you think?

Strong personalites, IMHO find giving up their own contro to another sumething they must wrap their mind around, not just restrained physically.  It mental/physcholoigal vs emotional. physical.
 
That's why I think.  Strong opinionated does make for easy obedience submission.  IMHO


(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: restraint - 9/20/2008 2:40:55 PM   
RealSub58


Posts: 1073
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: greeneyes600

I reckon you might be right   I've got a headache now!!


Most men tell me I think too much..introspection can be a bitch. 
Give your head a break and stop thinking so much.

(in reply to greeneyes600)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: restraint Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.250