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ResidentSadist -> RE: THe Older Younger and what ever generations (9/19/2008 3:44:08 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LATEXBABY64
…in the connection process … What area of all generations do find it most hard or easy to comunicate with younger doms dommes or older doms dommes or subs and why are they difficult to talk to or easy
(For the PC, the competitive and fragile egos, understand that “good whipping” is used as a personal expression of mine, not a measure of quality compared to other styles of whipping)
Age does not always equate to experience. I think experience is the number one communications barrier in getting connected. I’m not talking about experience as in a measure of time but a frame of reference, attitude, desire and perspective. It seems that when experience areas and levels are unbalanced and mismatched, one or the other thinks they know what the other person is talking about but they really have no idea because their idea of it so different.
When I speak of a “good whipping”, I bet someone with only top and bottom experience in public dungeons and second hand information from the local munch has no idea what I have in mind. They are used to the polite and socially acceptable leather massages they get with fluffy leather pompoms people call floggers. They’re lucky to have their skin turn pink and get warm to the touch. It is soft, sensual, erotic and the emotional connections warm and gratifying in a pleasing manner to all that participate and watch.
When I think of a “good whipping”, I’m not talking about something quite so polite. I’m talking about the kind of thing that hurts to watch but warms your heart to see so much passion and love. It’s like watching child birth, it commands empathy from all those that view it in a painful celebration of life and love itself.
In a “good whipping” I want to remain emotionally connected and verbally tell them how much I enjoyed beating them or how it makes me feel to have such an impact on their state of mind. I want to beat them until they are physically and mentally reduced to the raw animal state and experience primal release so intense they breakdown crying tears of joy, pleasure, pain and passion. I want to push trust and our connection to the edge of their ability.
If I barged into a “good whipping” with a someone unfamiliar to it, then while beating her I explained in detail how attractive she looked under my whip, how it touched my heart that she would bleed for me, how she was such a “good girl” for opening up and asked her to tell me how much she trusted me, demanded she focus on that trust and speak of it while I whipped her, then told her what I was about to do next was really, really going to hurt and it was OK to cry… If I used my personal knowledge about her father/lovers/childhood to touch her heart and show how I cared enough to reach inside her and give her emotional and physical release… then I looked her in the eye so she could see the love on my face as I hurt in a way she had never felt before… well, that’s not what some people expect from a “good whipping” and it exceeds the average kinksters fluffy massage etiquette of “it’s all good as long as no one gets hurt”. It's not what most kinksters want to experience or watch and it drives ‘new age’ dungeon monitors crazy trying to decide if they dare step in and stop the scene as tears, screams and blood flow freely while the crowd is divided into two separate schools of thought… yet to some with a different area of experience, “it’s not a good whipping if they don’t cry”.
I have known teenagers that understand a “good whipping” and I know 40 years olds that don’t have a clue yet have twice as much time in the lifestyle. The 40 year olds aren’t less experienced by measure of time and they lead happy and satisfying lifestyles. But their experience is . . . well, they just aren’t “in my world” and I could never see the logic in getting a massage with a flogger when a good pair of hands are so much more effective. On the other hand, they could never understand turning a simple erotic act like a whipping into an orgasmic primal scream/cry therapy session.
Desire, experience… attitude. If they don’t mesh, no matter what age or how much time you have in, it won’t help you connect if you are from different worlds. Call it guppies and sharks, gazelles and lions… call it what you will. Only a narrow mind or competitive ego sees one of those beautiful creatures as better than another. I just see it as what mixes and matches well with each other in the sea of life.
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