Differences in how you reply (Full Version)

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GreedyTop -> Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 7:27:57 AM)

OK.. this may get moved, but I figured I'd start it here.

Today I noticed something about the way I respond to initial emails (and sometimes, subsequent ones, as well).

The ones that come off as form letters I ignore.

The ones from one or two liners that comment only on my appearance, I tend to reply only with 'thx'
This also applies to emails from people who haven't put anything in their profiles except absolute basic info (if that).
People who make a comment to something specific in my profile get actual replies, even if it's thanks, but no thanks.
The ones from people who tell me that I'm perfect for them but obviously havent read my profile tend to get (on a non-snarky day) good luck in your search.. on a snarky day, they get something along the lines of "what? you're too lazy to actually READ a profile to find out if someone is compatible??? Sod off!"

I know I'm not the only one whose response style varies.. am I?




badlilthang -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 7:35:52 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

OK.. this may get moved, but I figured I'd start it here.

Today I noticed something about the way I respond to initial emails (and sometimes, subsequent ones, as well).

The ones that come off as form letters I ignore.
***Ditto***
The ones from one or two liners that comment only on my appearance, I tend to reply only with 'thx'
This also applies to emails from people who haven't put anything in their profiles except absolute basic info (if that).
***ditto here also...just a name does not really tell much about a person - so it is impossible to answer with anything else than a thank you...and move on***
People who make a comment to something specific in my profile get actual replies, even if it's thanks, but no thanks.
***i have gotten a few mails about my profile and journal - and 99% are very nice and well written - have even gotten a few friends that way - which i appreciate a lot***
The ones from people who tell me that I'm perfect for them but obviously havent read my profile tend to get (on a non-snarky day) good luck in your search.. on a snarky day, they get something along the lines of "what? you're too lazy to actually READ a profile to find out if someone is compatible??? Sod off!"
***here i just say thank you....and that is that. Takes a little longer to know than someone is perfect than a peek at a pic and a profile/journal, me thinkest. if it is a rude approach chances are i do not reply at all - or tell them to get a grip.***
I know I'm not the only one whose response style varies.. am I?
***nope***




Paulnz -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 7:37:20 AM)

Of those you give an actual reply, do you have a limit on how long the email would be ?




MistressOfGa -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 7:38:42 AM)

Just ditto down the board for me too. It would have to be an amazing letter, and trust me, I have recieved them, to get enough attention for me to write back.




eyesopened -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 7:43:09 AM)

Really, I see emails at CM no different than the types of communications I might get out in real life. 

For example, if I were strolling in the mall, someone might stop me and ask, "Excuse me, do you know if this mall has a Books-A-Million?"  In that case I would give a polite and honest reply.  Someone else might stop me and say, "I couldn't help but notice you have lovely nails."  To which I would simply say "Thank you."  and then there might be someone who mutters under his breath as I pass, "nice tits" to which I simply ignore but am secretly pleased.  Of course there could be someon bold enough to threaten me and demand my money to which I would scream, shove the palm of my hand up his nose and report it to the police.





everhope -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 7:48:48 AM)

i have been known to use the pre-formatted responses that CM provides...point and click and they can not complain i did not respond. i do respond to any sincere e-mails in a thoughtful manner even if they do not seem to be compatible.
then there are those snarky days....some beg for snarky.
 
may we all find our bliss.




tammystarm -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 7:48:54 AM)

totally They have to have some kind of respect for themselves as well as others first of all. Secondly no pathetic one liners like i know you already and im perfect for ya. The bend over bitch  emails usually get a nice reply ;)  the holy shit i know im married BUT ones are generally just ignored. The nice pics got anymore usually get a pick of a gorilla picking its nose, or something along that lines.




Dnomyar -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 7:48:57 AM)

It all depends on who I am responding to. Im nice to most people even the ones who critize my replies on the boards. Im not a clone so my opinion will differ from yours. So live with it.




CreativeDominant -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:07:27 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

OK.. this may get moved, but I figured I'd start it here.

Today I noticed something about the way I respond to initial emails (and sometimes, subsequent ones, as well).

The ones that come off as form letters I ignore.

The ones from one or two liners that comment only on my appearance, I tend to reply only with 'thx'
This also applies to emails from people who haven't put anything in their profiles except absolute basic info (if that).
People who make a comment to something specific in my profile get actual replies, even if it's thanks, but no thanks.
The ones from people who tell me that I'm perfect for them but obviously havent read my profile tend to get (on a non-snarky day) good luck in your search.. on a snarky day, they get something along the lines of "what? you're too lazy to actually READ a profile to find out if someone is compatible??? Sod off!"

I know I'm not the only one whose response style varies.. am I?


My response style varies also.  As a dominant male, I don't get the volume of mail that a submissive/switch/dominant female does...especially an attractive one, such as you Greedy.

When someone views my pix or my profile, I send a quick note..."thank you for perving my profile".

When someone sends a note about a post I have made on the serious side, I take the time to answer their query or respond to their statement.  It may be only a couple of cmail exchanges but I enjoy this as it can be and has been intellectually stimulating with a few people and, in a few instances, I have wound up with good friends over a simple exchange about a post.

When someone sends a comment about my profile, it depends on what they say.  If they want to insult the pix or something I have written in my profile, I write a short "thanks for your opinion.  you're entitled to it..."  Now, if they care to take the time to write and tell me why what I have written is "wrong" (usually the Rules portion or the Basic Premise portion...I am sure there will be more as I begin to add to my profile again), then I will clarify my position...but only as long as the discourse remains civil and intelligent.  If they just want to argue from some "it just IS wrong" standpoint...then they are told to "go away if you cannot come up with an argument with teeth".




RavenMuse -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:15:52 AM)

Any memo that shows lack of effort the only effort of Mine it deserves is hitting the delete button.




HagiaSophia -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:21:17 AM)

My responses vary in direct proportion to the amount of effort put into reading my profile, following my directions, and writing an interesting e-mail. For the love of all gods! I know I'm tall and attractive. Of course, I still like to hear it, but not if it's the only thing you've got to say. I could get a parrot to do that. The notes that get the best responses are the ones that are specific (I liked X,Y and Z in your profile. I'm looking for A,B, and C) and distinctive. They communicate things that differentiate the writer from the hundreds of other petitioners. 




tammystarm -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:21:56 AM)

ok that my dear just made me wanna perv Your profile..well it was about time i did so anyway.......




LaTigresse -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:25:41 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

Any memo that shows lack of effort the only effort of Mine it deserves is hitting the delete button.


This about sums it up for me.




chamberqueen -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:29:10 AM)

I definitely have different responses, including blocking people who have annoyed me under another screen name in the past.  The ones that really get to me are those that say that they read my profile carefully and yet they are offering me something that I am not looking for (like the wrong gender).  





Lashra -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:32:33 AM)

With me form letters are ignored...
Doms wanting a Domme to dominate their slave while they watch are ignored...
Doms wanting to be dominated are ignored...
subs who are seeking are ignored...
men wanting to know how big my tits are, are ignored....
business men on trips who email their hotel room numbers and cell phone numbers because they want to hook up for a "meet and beat" are ignored...

the list goes on and on because my profile clearly states I am here for friends ONLY, that does not mean any exceptions or friends with benefits. It is what it is. If a friend emails they will get a reply or someone who isn't yet a friend but acts like will get a reply. Send me something stupid and you will get put on ignore because thats where most of the assholes end up.

~Lashra




UmbraDomina -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:38:06 AM)

my most comman responce is :" As my profile clearly states I am not seeking another male in my life, thank you for your kind words. good luck in your search."

I have noticed that while up to 50 or so people a day perv my profile, (99.5% men) very few of them email which is why I spelled out what I would and would not consider, and in detail of what I am seeking. The people who email me, since we can tell who has viewed our profiles, almost always have not viewed it. Even though the first words in my profile are "please read my entire profile before emailing me".

Alexandra~





faerytattoodgirl -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 8:42:13 AM)

hah well i was just written to the same form letter message by a guy using multiple accounts...so i wrote a nasty reply and reported the msg.  one account he was a cd, the other a man.  both from the uk.  profile stated 51 yet he claimed to be 30...

i usually ignore these msgs but i couldnt resist....
hah...

most of my msgs i get are from forum users.  i very rarely get msgs on the other side...though i used to get many one liner msgs with either some kind of compliment or some kind of hate msg.  i just delete them as they were never a response to my actual profile.




GreedyTop -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 4:07:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Paulnz

Of those you give an actual reply, do you have a limit on how long the email would be ?


my reply? 

it depends on what the inital email said




Raechard -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 4:25:26 PM)

You can’t beat a good form letter in the style of Gloria Estefan….

I thought that I knew all there was to know [namefield] i.e. I knew all about love, I lived the highs and made it through the lows. I knew all about love but now I must admit I'm surprised and feel I've only scratched the surface because when I look in your eyes [namefield] I understand my one true purpose.

You were sent to me by angels up above [namefield], I'm certain I thought I'd show someone what love can be but what did I know until along came you.

And as this feeling grows with every day [namefield] because you awaken my heart; a heart so full I fear that it may break if we're ever apart.

Turn the beat around, let me hear percussion.

Raechard




MusicalBoredom -> RE: Differences in how you reply (8/25/2008 4:26:24 PM)

I have all of this from a different perspective.  I truly didn't get that this was a dating site as much as it was a "mutual interest" site where people might hook up but that wasn't the focus.  (Ok I'm a bit dense about these things at times.)  As such I did and still do write people if I have something to say to them.  I have never contacted anyone looking for a hookup, a date, a girlfriend or a one night stand.  I have sent messages to local people when there was an event that I thought might interest them here or I might send something about their profile if some message popped up when I logged in such as "congratulations" or "welcome."  To me that is much like seeing someone that I don't know crawl out of a limo with "Just Married" written on it.  I say "congratulations" and I'm not expecting to get to know them in any way shape or form. I also might send someone a message based on something they said in a forum. 

Sometimes people have taken my messages for what I said and responded in kind with a "thank you" or "that sounds like a nice event."  Sometimes I have gotten snarkey messages that I must not have read their profile since it said they were looking for someone this age or that or a lesbian.  I'm not quite sure what that's about since I know quite a few lesbians and none of them have a "no talking to or knowing males" rule.  Sometimes I get "deleted unread."  Mind you that I have never sent a cmail where I was hitting on someone.

At first all of these types of responses confused me but well I can't really control how people see me or my messages.  The people I have sent mail to that I see on the boards do usually take the comments as they were meant.




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