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RE: Starting over........... - 8/19/2008 3:43:00 PM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
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quote:

ORIGINAL: NeedingMore220

Your post made me smile. You sound like your emotions are all in a jumble, but on top if it all you're happy and excited, which is fantastic. I'm glad for you.

Oh i'm definately jumbled lol. But ya know what i like it. I love the surprises that keep coming my way even if i'm not sure at that moment how to handle them or respond.

quote:

my technique is to try to remember to keeping breathing, keep asking myself "am i really happy in this situation?" and if the answer to that question is "yes" keep on going. Perhaps this would be good for you too? Glad to see you happy :)

Thank you and yes that is a technique i will try.

quote:

You're feeling that nervousness many get when starting something serious. It happens to the best of us at times.

I think you hit the nail on the head there. A little worried he may not be as into me as i am into him though. Not that he has said or done anything to make me feel like that at all. Fingers crossed.

quote:

if you read my profile, i have only been serving Her a short time, but its the small things that allowed me to open up and trust

Me too i think. Head still in a spin so not completely sure lol.

quote:

*beams proudly*

Though you should remind Him, He hasn't had my approval yet ...*serious face then cracks up* ....

am sooo happy for you my darling, you deserve every second of happiness ... and more

I think you'll like him and i know he will love you

quote:

The only problem with feeling this way is you can never go back, nothing else is ever good enough.

I've been there and you know you are right about going back. You can go forwards though and find different happiness

quote:

It IS scary being involved in a relationship that involves emotions - especially if you aren't used to it. Just take deep breaths when you feel like running in the opposite direction and remind yourself that this is a good thing, and you want it!

Haven't had the urge to run yet but ya know i reckon i might. I'll breathe though and hopefully not fuck this up.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to NeedingMore220)

Post #: 21

RE: Starting over........... - 8/19/2008 3:54:13 PM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
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Hi hun, wanted to address your post seperately as i think you have made some very good and insighful points about me and my relationships.

quote:

I'm very proud of you for opening a thread with stuff like this....with FEELINGS.

Let me tell you it was the hardest thread to write i have ever posted.

quote:

It's great because we can all identify with it (as in being human) or toss it aside .....because of pre-conceived ideas either about posting or about you.

I think this has been a problem for about two years now. Very few people could relate to the cold unemotional way i chose to run my relationships. I guess i came across at times as a little unhuman.

quote:

I'm happy for you. There are many times i have wanted to judge and jump in and say: i do not think that the topping play was going to be emotionally satisfying over an extended period of time.

I have been happy, fulfilled in these last two years. I've grown though and find im at a stage where i want and need more. I think you know i would not have listened, i wasn't ready.

quote:

For me emotional attachment and physical pain are in a relative relationship. The less emotional attchment the more physical pain i seem to need and to be able to tolerate.
The more emotional attachment the less pain i feel i can tolerate or need.
however the amount of pain and or emotional attachment i get isn't my choice is it.....that's the paradox.
well done Miss T.

Completely with you here.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to Prinsexx)

Post #: 22

RE: Starting over........... - 8/19/2008 5:38:19 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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Not that we are identical, but I can tell you that I still regularly struggle with "being taken care of." As much as I love it, I'm not easy to spoil most of the time.

I'm glad you had a great time, just try to keep in perspective that you had one hot kinky weekend- which does not long term fulfillment make.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 23

RE: Starting over........... - 8/19/2008 5:42:49 PM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Not that we are identical, but I can tell you that I still regularly struggle with "being taken care of." As much as I love it, I'm not easy to spoil most of the time.

I'm glad you had a great time, just try to keep in perspective that you had one hot kinky weekend- which does not long term fulfillment make.

I know and i'm attempting to keep my head out of those clouds

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 24

RE: Starting over........... - 8/19/2008 6:24:32 PM

corsetgirl

Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline

I am so happy for you. It is scary to be so open and especially when you have been independent but how do you know if you keep running from someone who could be a potentially excellent dom for you?

Take the time to get to know him as it sounds as though a door is opening up for you. Go for it!

(in reply to stella41b)

Post #: 25

RE: Starting over........... - 8/19/2008 7:58:39 PM

lovingpet

Posts: 4270
Joined: 6/19/2005
Status: offline

Sounds like you and I have had similar weekends. Enjoy it as you have come a long way to get to this point.

I am just holding on for dear life! What a wonderful adventure it is, but it is new and exciting, confusing, and scary.

Congratulations and best wishes!

lovingpet

(in reply to corsetgirl)

Post #: 26

RE: Starting over........... - 8/19/2008 9:02:19 PM

TemptingNviceSub

Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline

Be brave!..sometimes a tiny crack in a foundation does not necessarily mean that there is a weakness,but that,there is a settling and adjustment being made....Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 27

RE: Starting over........... - 8/19/2008 11:33:19 PM

myassyourhand

Posts: 4
Joined: 7/17/2008
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What a great post! I'm so glad for you!

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)

Post #: 28

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 12:16:07 AM

monywildcat

Posts: 452
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline

Yay! It is wonderful to hear that you have found someone that you have an emotional connection to!!! That gives all the play, all the little interactions that little extra something that you didn't even know was missing until you got a taste. That is truly wonderful. Yippee!!

And yes, it is a very scary thing to finally find someone that you are able to connect to in this way, you feel vulnerable, you feel jumbled up and it is quite a culture shock to go from emotionless, hollow interactions to one where you are able to open up and trust, and just plain FEEL again. I wish you the best, enjoy the ride! I'm beaming for you!

(in reply to stella41b)

Post #: 29

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 2:00:08 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Embrace change...follow your bliss...and ten other appropriate cliche-yet-true statements, the obvious of which is BE HAPPY.

*hugs*

Master Fire

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The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Ms Relationship Books
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BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 30

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 3:24:45 AM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingpet

Sounds like you and I have had similar weekends. Enjoy it as you have come a long way to get to this point.

I am just holding on for dear life! What a wonderful adventure it is, but it is new and exciting, confusing, and scary.

Congratulations and best wishes!

lovingpet

Same to you xx

quote:

Be brave!..sometimes a tiny crack in a foundation does not necessarily mean that there is a weakness,but that,there is a settling and adjustment being made....Tempting

I'm trying

quote:

Embrace change...follow your bliss...and ten other appropriate cliche-yet-true statements, the obvious of which is BE HAPPY.

*hugs*

Master Fire

Thank you.
I'm very happy at present

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to lovingpet)

Post #: 31

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 3:27:02 AM

SailingBum

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Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
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Hates to be the pragmatic one. Keep in mind you have known him 2 weeks. All the best on your journey.

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to stella41b)

Post #: 32

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 3:35:06 AM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

Hates to be the pragmatic one. Keep in mind you have known him 2 weeks. All the best on your journey.

BadOne

it's fine.
all advice is appreciated.
i am trying to keep my head out of the clouds.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to SailingBum)

Post #: 33

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 5:36:57 AM

MaamJay

Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline

miss I am truly happy for you. I do hope that He is feeling likewise! Have you communicated how you are feeling to Him? I know that will be difficult, but important I think to tell Him that you feel like a door has opened that you never thought would. I hope it doesn't scare Him into running either ... but if He is what you have described, I would hope He would simply be delighted!

While I am sure plenty of Us here are hoping it doesn't all end in tears ... even if it should, it would still have been an experience worth having!

Hugs
Maam Jay aka violet[A]

_____________________________

Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 34

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 5:53:39 AM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MaamJay

miss I am truly happy for you. I do hope that He is feeling likewise! Have you communicated how you are feeling to Him? I know that will be difficult, but important I think to tell Him that you feel like a door has opened that you never thought would. I hope it doesn't scare Him into running either ... but if He is what you have described, I would hope He would simply be delighted!

While I am sure plenty of Us here are hoping it doesn't all end in tears ... even if it should, it would still have been an experience worth having!

Hugs
Maam Jay aka violet[A]

He has seen the op of this thread so yes i think He knows how i feel. He seemed very pleased about it.
I am hoping it doesn't end in tears but should it then i shall come back and read your post. It will have been worth it most definately.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 35

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 6:15:32 AM

MaamJay

Posts: 2101
Joined: 9/2/2005
Status: offline

Good on you for sharing it with Him! And with us too ...

Takes courage to be a sub!
Maam Jay aka violet[A]

_____________________________

Life is a song ... and I love singing it! (By me!)

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 36

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 7:50:30 AM

CreativeDominant

Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline

So, what I noted to you on a couple of other threads has shown itself to be true. You've found that, with a caring and feeling sadist that he does not need to be as harsh in his play as what you are used to because YOU feel an emotional connection to him. And all that goes into that...the hours chatting, the arm around you, the aftercare and concern expressed after playing in a less harsh but just as intense a manner...led to a satisfaction during play that was just as good, if not better, than the extreme play that has been required before. I don't see anywhere in your post where you note that he is not a good sadist because he does not play in as extreme a fashion as you are used to needing.

Funny how allowing yourself to feel emotions related to caring towards someone else and allowing your to be open to receiving those emotions can change the outlook, isn't it?

I see nothing stumbling about your post and am really glad that you are experiencing this sea change in your life. My fingers are crossed for you.

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 37

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 12:24:05 PM

missturbation

Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline

quote:

Funny how allowing yourself to feel emotions related to caring towards someone else and allowing your to be open to receiving those emotions can change the outlook, isn't it?

Yep
Sticks tongue out. Know it all
Just kidding.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to CreativeDominant)

Post #: 38

RE: Starting over........... - 8/20/2008 1:04:54 PM

softness

Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline

thinks the little lady can be seen grinning from the other side of the Pennines ...

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veritas, respectus honorque in corio

(in reply to missturbation)

Post #: 39

RE: Starting over........... - 8/21/2008 1:04:30 PM

Deliena

Posts: 623
Joined: 6/16/2007
From: Darlington, United Kingdom
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

thinks the little lady can be seen grinning from the other side of the Pennines ...

I just saw her teeth go "ping" over the Angel of the North I think! LOL

(in reply to softness)

Post #: 40

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