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Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 9:49:30 AM   
knees2you


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Hi there.
 
What are some ways of getting your mate to go into subspace? Exspeciall in the bedroom.
 
Sometimes I think I'm close, but not sure?
 
Thanks for the help. knees2you
 

< Message edited by knees2you -- 8/7/2008 9:50:42 AM >
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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 2:55:53 PM   
soul2share


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I'll be watching this one.....I'm working with a mentor Dom right now, and I'm stuck.....I can't seem to get the mind and body to work together to achieve subspace.....all I ever do when I'm being worked over is count the damn strokes!  So any info about getting the mind to blank out will be noted!

Knees, there have been a few times where it feels like I'm floating......is that what you're feeling?  It was explained to me that when you reach subspace, your Dom can do literally anything he wants, and you're not even aware of it happening until you come down.  Now that takes some serious trust!

< Message edited by soul2share -- 8/7/2008 2:57:37 PM >


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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 3:02:02 PM   
silkncarol


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Sometimes if you think about it and try too hard it's just not gonna happen.....

Relax and enjoy being in the moment............as they say, it's the journey. 

I dont' go into subspace everytime i play, but that doesn't mean i don't enjoy it just the same.....when i have, it's the mindset and being pushed past my limits with pain......

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 3:19:33 PM   
kiwisub12


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Subspace isn't something that i went to straight away. It probably took a year with my Sir before i found subspace, and it takes an intense thuddy caning to do it. It is easier to find if my Sir gives me a short break to process the pain, and (?) allow the endorphines to circulate.

Thuddy canings do it for me - i have seen subs subspace with the violet wand, and play piercings. It seems to be an individual thing, depending on your own personality and "brand" of submission and turnons.  I think you need to give yourself time and explore as many ways of playing as available. One day you may find yourself spacing, and not even realise it.

I also think there is a trust element, allowing you to let go.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 3:19:42 PM   
Deliena


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i just relax and breathe and if i'm going to hit subspace that session i do, and if not, i don't.

There's some good threads in the Ask a Submissive forum abotu this.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 3:27:59 PM   
mystsshykitty


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all it takes me is my hood or a good blindfold.  throw in a little bondage and some good music,,  and boom i'm gone.  almost 90% of the time,  but i have a great time if i dont go under either.


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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 3:30:51 PM   
mmsprecious


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there are times when a tone or a word can do it in a heartbeat...there are also times it takes a lot of physical stimulation and there are times it doesn't happen. just let it go and enjoy the experience!

Master Mike's precious

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 3:57:39 PM   
StrongSpirit


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Wave a watch in front of their face and say "You are getting sleepy, very sleepy."

Actually hypnosis is very similar to sub-space.  Many of the same techniques work.   Pleasant environment, soft music, nice smells.   Keep things consistent.   Try to avoid requiring the sub to think or speak.   Instead give them a simple, physical task to do.   For example, if they are tied up, require them to flex their arm after each blow rather than say "Thank you sir, may I have another".

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 3:59:25 PM   
Leatherist


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I think it depends a lot on the chemical and mental make up of the sub, and the skill and ability to manipulate of the dom. I can usually take someone there pretty quickly, just using my hands and voice.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 6:14:30 PM   
charlie63


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In the bedroom? Multiple forced orgasms beyond the point of pleasure into torment followed by attempts at fisting (something we are working on achieving). The overstimulation from the orgasms exhausts me and the pain of fisting pushes me over the edge of conscious thought.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 9:59:30 PM   
entendreentendre


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Subspace is something with infinite definitions and interpretations...  here is a very basic analysis that offers lots of room for personal reflection:

When the body experiences pain, there are 2 seemingly conflicting reactions - the production of dopamine to dull the pain and the production of adrenaline to facilitate in helping the person escape the painful situation.  The adrenaline normally quickly counteracts any lingering effects of dopamine.

Through the employment of bondage, obedience, sheer repetition, etc, eventually the body curtails production of adrenaline.  The result is the most basic concept of subspace - the dreamy, disconnected state of mind when you are basically getting high on dopamine and the body has more or less abandoned the 'fight or flight' reaction.

That is the bare bones "what" of Subspace - The "how" is much more subjective and variable.  But understanding the tools and processes involved helps, I hope.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/7/2008 11:39:55 PM   
SlaveSimone


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Here is a link that you may find useful-
http://www.steel-door.com/access_subspace.htm
I have yet to try it, but perhaps it may work for you and your mate. Some times it comes at strange and unexpected times, so you may simply want to try and keep tabs on how your partner is feeling through out a play session, perhaps you're getting closer then you think.

Good luck,

Simone

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/8/2008 4:47:25 AM   
RCdc


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Knees, you have been around a while now, I am surprised you asked this.
You can't list ways into subspace for someone.  You can only get a glimmer of what may spark it's progression for one person.
It's like orgasm, some do - some don't - and some never will.
 
You have to find your own oasis and drink from that.  My only advice is not to try to get there or you will just end up a frustrated bunny.
 
the.dark.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/8/2008 4:49:42 AM   
RCdc


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quote:

ORIGINAL: soul2share
It was explained to me that when you reach subspace, your Dom can do literally anything he wants, and you're not even aware of it happening until you come down.  Now that takes some serious trust!


No necessarily.  It's different for all people.  I am totally aware of what is being done to me during subspace some of the time.  Don't get caught up in the 'its this way' jargon.
 
the.dark.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/8/2008 6:02:42 AM   
daddysliloneds


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there is absolutely nothing in the world you can do to help or get your partner to achieve subspace; they will get there when they free themselves of their body and their mind and are 100% in the moment...

at least that's how it is with me.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/8/2008 6:38:46 AM   
mistoferin


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I agree with dark that what might work for one may not work for another. I posted this recently about how I get there. I will repost it....but I have no idea if it will work for anyone else.

quote:


How I get there:
I very consciously help myself into subspace. I focus on Sir's touch, his voice and the sensations he provides. I concentrate on the beat of the music. I close my eyes and focus my breathing. It works best for me when the pain gets to the level that my heart is really starting to race and I imagine myself taking control of my heart rate and breathing. I literally visualize my heart. I visualize the pain as red and hot and I breathe in deeply. I visualize the air that I breathe in as blue/green and very cool. As the breath goes in I direct it to the area of pain and the blue/green mist envelops the red/hot pain. Some of the red mixes with the blue/green and the red becomes orange/yellow. As the blue/green/cool breath mixes with the red/hot pain I exhale and it carries parts of the pain back out of my body. What is left is a sensation that penetrates and reverberates throughout me and I hone in on that sensation. The rest of the world, other than Sir and myself, fades to black and he and I become very vivid.
At this point I start to see small pinpricks or flashes of light in my periphery and my vision kind of tunnels. I can feel my heart rate and breathing slowing and a serenity starts to overtake me. At this point I just surrender myself to it. Kind of like if you are paddling a canoe furiously against the current and suddenly you just stop and allow yourself to flow with it. That's when I know I am on my way and I just let go and I stop all efforts to process the sensations.
Shortly after that I'm gone and in a post a few years ago I wrote what that feels like to me. Here is a copy of what I wrote then.

What it’s like there:
Subspace for me always comes during a scene or at times, it has even been triggered by just really great sex. Externally I am told that it is like this. If I am being scened, when I enter Subspace my body relaxes and goes slack, I no longer respond to painful stimuli, my eyes are no longer focused, my pupils dilate and I get a very calm and serene look about me. I can't really respond verbally at this point. Every touch can generate an orgasm, even a stroke on my cheek.
Internally, it is very calm. It is like being enveloped by a cool mist. Color perception is different and I very frequently see things in shades of purple. Quite frequently there is a sensation of water running over me. There have been times when I can see the room, including myself, as if I am looking down from above. Mentally I am very foggy, kind of like after a good dose of morphine...lol. As I begin to come back down, I generally get a case of the shakes. The world comes back into focus in bits and pieces. I am very much in need of a warm blanket, a good cuddle and quite frequently I am extremely tired, although there are exceptions to that as there have been times when I have bounced up like I am ready to run a marathon, excitedly chattering and giggly. The effects can last for several hours after...sometimes even longer...and it would not be a good time for me to drive a car or operate heavy machinery...lol. Although, I may seem perfectly coherent...sometimes it takes awhile for that fog to fully lift.

How I learned to do it:
I haven't always consciously assisted myself. For the first 8 or 9 years that I was involved with BDSM my journey leading up to subspace was more like a frustrating fight. I think that it happened then more as a result of my brain and body overloading but I didn't have the ability to really control it. I knew I loved the feeling but I had no idea how to get there.
How I learned to "help" myself was purely an accident. I was very, very sick and in constant and chronic pain. Some of the coping skills I learned were biofeedback and meditation. It was found that I have an amazingly natural ability to do those things and I got a lot of relief from them. Actually, I had been doing a bit of it on some level already but didn't fully understand the techniques. I should also say that by this time I had already learned that I could mentally pull myself out of a place I didn't want to be...although I had no understanding of exactly "how".
Anyway, when I started to really learn how to control my pain through these techniques I realized that my efforts took me to a place that felt very similar to subspace. So the next natural progression for me was to "play" with it, if you will, during scenes. It was a slow and bumpy start but eventually I found that I could pretty effectively and consistently give myself the push that was needed to go smoothly without all of the frustration and internal struggle.
The downside to that is that I know the path so well that sometimes I rush to get there and Sir literally will step in and prevent it so that I go on his time frame and not mine. There are also times when we are in a place where the energy in the room will be off that I just can't find the focus that I need and it will take me a long time to get there, if I can at all...or my subspace experience will be altered in a negative way and I will go for a rather freaky or upsetting ride.
 


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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/8/2008 7:27:49 AM   
eyesopened


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I have never been in subspace and not for the lack of desire, the skill of the Top or anything.  It's just something that my body does not have the capacity to do.  For a long time I felt like I was inadequate, flawed, diseased, bad, fake, and a freak.  Then I simply accepted that I do not go into subspace.  *shrug*  There are people who cannot dream in color, who can't be hypnotised, etc. I just accept me as I am.  Fortunately my Master is a Sadist and He doesn't want me to go into subspace.  He wants me to fully feel and fully experience ever moment of suffering He inflicts.  For Him, my 'deficient' becomes an asset!  I am blessed.

What I'm trying to say, is subspace is not necessarily an goal that needs to be set for everyone or every situation.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/8/2008 10:13:56 PM   
LadyPact


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I don't know if this is what you're going for, but there are a lot of ways to get a person to subspace.  Pain is the easiest one.  The use of floggers, canes, whips, crops, etc.  There are also those cool times when you can get a person there by playing with their mind.  Personally, I love using My nails and teeth to take a person over the edge.  Once in a while, it will happen just by My voice.

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/8/2008 11:10:07 PM   
CookieSlave


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I've read all of these various threads about "subspace" and I'm slightly confused.  Bear in mind, this is all very new for me.  But.. this sounds so much to me like hypnosis - is it a form of trance? Or can it be? Or is a "self-trance" how someone gets there??   The experiences I've seen people describe, including the lingering aftereffects just sound to me very much like hypnosis...  If would be nice to hear from someone who has experienced both, to confirm or deny a connection. ;-)

--cs

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RE: Some ways to Subspace?? - 8/10/2008 7:24:18 PM   
knees2you


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quote:

I think it depends a lot on the chemical and mental make up of the sub, and the skill and ability to manipulate of the dom. I can usually take someone there pretty quickly, just using my hands and voice.


I am the the Dominate one in the bedroom.
My wife has never heard or even been in subspace.
 
I'm having trouble getting her started.
 
Thanks again for the Advice.
 
Always, knees2you

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