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RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 11:55:43 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline 		This age issue has been going on for as long as recorded history and provbably since mankind walked upright. There are going to be older people jealoius of youth and all things pertaining to it and there will be people jealous of the older folk and things they see particular to that age too.. Older guys and girls will be jealous of the young hot things a partner may lust after as the young folk may be jealous of some of the older hotties attracting some young hottie who they lust after too.. All you can do is to learn to live with it and move on. No sence in getting knickers in a twist because shcu things will age you bloody fast..

IB
(The incorrigible, irrepressible and irreverent Bear)

(in reply to faerytattoodgirl)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 11:58:46 AM   
SirDragon1961


Posts: 31
Joined: 2/14/2008
Status: offline 		Umm, it would be a funny conflicting profile if we took the primary desirable physical and mental attributes of each generation (say 20 yrs, 30, yrs etc) from each generation and from each gender (and trans genders?!)

Then add the question of which generation is thought to be  most insecure and secure and why each generation thinks that?

Then we'd all have laughs- too many variables. 

(in reply to faerytattoodgirl)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 12:09:49 PM   
Coupleofwhats


Posts: 280
Joined: 6/4/2008
Status: offline 		I find that age brings confidence.
I feel better about myself at 24 than I did when I was 19 and "perfect."

By 40, I'll be downright conceited!

(in reply to SirDragon1961)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 12:29:29 PM   
MusicalBoredom


Posts: 620
Joined: 5/8/2007
From: Louisiana/New York
Status: offline 		I think as far as what I'm attracted to, it's usually being "not so jealous."  I have dated, older than me, younger than me, heavier than me and lighter than me.  The thing that I tend to be attracted to is comfort in ones self without being cockey about it.  People with chips on their shoulder are a turn off to me.  I think every stage of life that I have been in is just a stage.  No one stage was better than the other but each was different.  Each brought more of this or less of that in other words each had it's good parts and bad parts.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 12:49:38 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Personally I wear cute clothing because it makes me feel good about myself, and same with makeup when I bother with it, not cause I care what men think.  And pony tails are the majority of what I wear, that or down, and that too has nothing to do men and moret o do with my own PERSONAL preferance not to mess with styling of the hair, and when it's hot to not have it plastered to me.

Please don't make generalizions about why women wear cute things an makeup if not for the attention of males..
quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

If women didn't really give two shits about what men think of their looks, no one would wear make up or cute clothes and we'd all be walking around in sweat pants with hair in a ponytail and unshaved legs.  Akasha


(in reply to AAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 12:59:43 PM   
PsyVamp


Posts: 1026
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cantilena

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

I have seen and heard sentiments from younger women that would seem to indicate that many of them think that older women are jealous or intimidated by their age and beauty. I'm absolutely sure that there are indeed older women who feel exactly that way...but it certainly is not an across the board thing.

Actually, for some of us (myself included), quite the opposite is true. Certainly I can appreciate the beauty of a younger woman but there is absolutely nothing that I would trade to be one again. I LIKE my mature self....LOL. I have so much more to offer now than I ever did at twenty something....and I think a lot of other older women feel exactly the same way. I wouldn't give any of it up to be in tighter, younger skin when the only thing that I could possibly see that might be gained by doing so would be the superficial attentions of men.

So to the younger ones...please don't think that we are all that way. We don't all look at you with envy. Some of us just appreciate you for who you are, appreciate ourselves for who we are...and we don't automatically get our hackles up when you walk in the room. I think that sometimes younger women feel like they are discounted by us older gals...and that disregard must come from jealousy over their age. For some I am sure that it might even be true. Not all of us are like that though.


I think you're right: some of the older women probably are intimidated.  Maybe some of the younger ones pick up on that.  On the other hand, some of the younger ones likely play into it all as well.  Sort of like blood in the water, if you will.

At the end of the day, though, it's all sort of a joke.  I'll explain what I mean...

I read a few years ago about Paris Hilton being bitchily 'aghast' at some older female celebrities at a club somewhere.  She was talking about women in their 30s!  At the time, I only chuckled a bit and thought... oh, my dear misguided little twit: nothing is more fleeting than youth. 

So it's funny to me.  I just don't understand anyone being jealous of something so soon to disappear.  Likewise, I don't understand anyone who might rely upon it for self-validation or worth.  An older woman jealous of something she herself once enjoyed?  A younger woman so aware of her youth that she things of such a dynamic with her elder?  The situation makes me smile a little... chesirely, to be sure.


I've seen this happen at work...
One of my co-workers, late 20's or so, is ALWAYS comparing herself to the other women in the office.. she has to be prettier, thinner, have better clothes, better hair and makeup..
Well, a younger girl was hired as a summer intern and all of a sudden the other coworker was flirting outrageously with the two younger guys as well as the upper management... having the young guys "rate" the women in the office..oy..
I had a sit down with her and explained that she and the new girl weren't even in the same category so there was no reason for all of her actions. (the original coworker is married with children, the new girl is single right out of high school)She is so insecure she didn't even conciously know she was doing it.  She was so used to being the youngest in the group that the new girl threw her for a loop. 

So yes, I've seen it happen and I agree that it is mainly due to insecurity.  I didn't even think twice about the new girl because she didn't register as "competition".. I rarely "compete" anyway, it is too "high school" for me. 
My philosophy is either you want to be with me or you don't.  We are either a good match or we aren't and no other person is going to influence that.


_____________________________

Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. .
Could a blue screen of death constitute being defenestrated?
~Owner of wolf~ (one of them, anyway)

(in reply to cantilena)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 1:03:02 PM   
JoePNY707


Posts: 293
Joined: 6/4/2008
Status: offline 		Mist--if I could magically get an age-related wish as a gift, I'd want to be 18 physically, AND keep all the knowledge and experience I've gained over the years.

I agree with the other posters--the things you gain from experience FAR outweigh mere youth.

_____________________________

CHARTER MEMBER OF THE CM MLM

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 2:00:48 PM   
corsetgirl


Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline 		I am older, will be 50 next year and I am not really jealous of someone who in younger although I definitely would like to have the tight body...lol but I would never trade myself to be that age, again.  During that time, I was not sure what I wanted out of life, did not stick with any particular field of study as I changed majors three times in college and felt I had no direction at all. 

In some situations, I get along better with younger people than I do with my peers or those who are older than me.

(in reply to JoePNY707)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 2:15:42 PM   
ageingdom


Posts: 5
Joined: 12/5/2007
Status: offline 		I like women to look like women, with a little extra meat on their bones.  I am not into the little girl look shaved pubs.  It is also nice to be able to talk about things in history and not have it happen befor the sub was born.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 2:23:37 PM   
lally3


Posts: 595
Joined: 3/4/2008
Status: offline 		i can remember in my twenties walking through china town, London and having a woman walk up to me and slap me across the face. 

being beautiful at twenty is different to being a beautiful woman in your thirties or forties or fifties and i know a woman in her eighties who is absolutely stunning - you get forgiven by the sorry lot who judged you purely through an accident of birth and genetics that just happened to arrange your face and body in a way that achieves sociatal acclaim.  and frankly who needs their forgiveness anyway - to be accused of being nothing more than a face and a body and therefore not worth getting to know - who needs them, why should their opinion be worth anything to you.

who cares what these shallow people think, really - if they measure a young pretty woman only by how she appears then they are the ones stuck in a bitter ditch.



< Message edited by lally3 -- 7/23/2008 2:26:38 PM >

_____________________________

even doves have pride (Prince)

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Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 2:24:42 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ageingdom

 It is also nice to be able to talk about things in history and not have it happen befor the sub was born.


nods seriously ... this is why I like DV .. we can talk about the conquest of Gaul that way

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to ageingdom)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 3:50:47 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		It's also pretty hard to know WHAT to say.  You're a 21 year old with three solid years of heavy kink experience, in a Ds relationship for three years, know lots of people in the scene, and then you get blasted in an online forum by some 43 yo who just dropped into the cyber boards with a profile reading "i have no limits and only live to please my Master (who lives 500 miles away we met online two weeks ago)" who says to you "You little girl have nothing to say about life and what real issues are like."

After the 50th time that happens, sometimes you just get testy.  Yes, one would hope you'd be above that and realize how clueless the 43 yo really is...but let's face it Erin, you saw firsthand all the ageism I had to deal with when I first got here, and that was AFTER being active in the scene for 7 years already. 

So no, it's not always jealousy, it's not always fear, it's not always just plain ageism.  And reacting in kind never really helps anything.  But personally I see older people bash down younger people a heck of a lot more than I see the other way around, and when I do see it, it's almost always in REACTION to a bash.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 3:55:18 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

It's also pretty hard to know WHAT to say.  You're a 21 year old with three solid years of heavy kink experience, in a Ds relationship for three years, know lots of people in the scene, and then you get blasted in an online forum by some 43 yo who just dropped into the cyber boards with a profile reading "i have no limits and only live to please my Master (who lives 500 miles away we met online two weeks ago)" who says to you "You little girl have nothing to say about life and what real issues are like."

After the 50th time that happens, sometimes you just get testy.  Yes, one would hope you'd be above that and realize how clueless the 43 yo really is...but let's face it Erin, you saw firsthand all the ageism I had to deal with when I first got here, and that was AFTER being active in the scene for 7 years already. 

So no, it's not always jealousy, it's not always fear, it's not always just plain ageism.  And reacting in kind never really helps anything.  But personally I see older people bash down younger people a heck of a lot more than I see the other way around, and when I do see it, it's almost always in REACTION to a bash.


everything she said ... with bells on!

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 4:05:41 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

quote:

ORIGINAL: ageingdom

 It is also nice to be able to talk about things in history and not have it happen befor the sub was born.


nods seriously ... this is why I like DV .. we can talk about the conquest of Gaul that way




ooooohhhhh     . ......    you are SO going to get it!!!!!!

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 4:13:09 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub12

quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

quote:

ORIGINAL: ageingdom

 It is also nice to be able to talk about things in history and not have it happen befor the sub was born.


nods seriously ... this is why I like DV .. we can talk about the conquest of Gaul that way




ooooohhhhh     . ......    you are SO going to get it!!!!!!


I dont know *what* you mean!

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 4:24:04 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		uh huh, sure, like you are SOOOOOO innocent!

Faker.

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 4:25:18 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		gasps ... moi?

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 4:27:42 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		oui - vous!

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 4:28:08 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		mais non!

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Jealousy over age? - 7/23/2008 4:33:31 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
Besides........I can fondle perky boobs, a flat stomach and firm thighs any time I want to!! 

It's good to be me!


Now if there's ANYTHING to be envious of, THAT's it.  It IS good to be you, ya lucky dawg...............luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 40
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