RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (Full Version)

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Missokyst -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/16/2008 4:31:57 PM)

[It comes back to that key word in the beginning - choice. People post whatever they think and feel and choices, for better or worse, are made. This is just the way things are, the way the world is, and really when it comes down to it all you can do is take it or leave it. ]

Stella,
That was beautiful.



persephonee -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/16/2008 4:32:11 PM)

Stella, i have followed you on the boards since i first spied you and visited your sites. i am a huge fan of your mind and your wit and just wanted to let you know.

peace
perse



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/16/2008 5:53:52 PM)

So how exactly does one tell the difference between a poster who is being a big meanie, and a victim who doesn't want to deal with reality and calls someone a big meanie?



ExSteelAgain -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/16/2008 8:33:30 PM)

A message board, actually all socialization that has a beneficial goal, is founded on civility and compromise. Complaining about the conduct of others in an internet forum does little. Make it better by being unaffected, keeping your sense of humor and offering shrewd ideas now and then. Set the example and be satisfied with the thought you have brought a small amount of pleasure to the board. Use the throwing one starfish back in the sea at a time philosophy.



VeryMercurial -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/17/2008 6:42:12 AM)

I enjoyed this thread on the power of compassion in BDSM.
For some of us {myself included}, this post was taken in great stride
and it appears to be written with good intentions.
I don't think there is anything wrong with considering the power of
compassion in all life situations, including BDSM.
Thank you young MasterZen, for a breath of fresh air.



Owner4SexSlave -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/17/2008 7:39:49 AM)

Regardless if somebody is being polite or not, there is a certain measure of thought or opinion expressed.   Sure, people will be sarcastic as hell as times.  However, there is a measure of honest opinion and POV they are expressing.

At times, they are sharing with us things, they feel we need to hear, instead of trying to worry about being all nice.

Compassion and even lack of Compassion has it's purpose and use.  You have to understand that compassion is an idealism.  You have to deal with people that lack compassion at some point in time in life.   Some people have no mercy.

Plus mind you, a lot of people on this site, actually love and enjoy verbal humilation and mental sadomaso play.  Generally a lot of people here have sick twisted senses of humor.   Some people believe in mentally flogging or punishment of other people who they feel deserve it, or could benifit from not being shown any compassion.  Yes, dishing it out to help another person mentally grow as a human being.  Call it a form of mental Punishment and Discipline.

As my Great Aunt used to say, "If you can't take the heat stay the hell out of the kitchen."






DesFIP -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/17/2008 11:06:20 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Owner4SexSlave

Regardless if somebody is being polite or not, there is a certain measure of thought or opinion expressed.   Sure, people will be sarcastic as hell as times.  However, there is a measure of honest opinion and POV they are expressing.



Plus some of this is cultural. I'm a New Yorker. Of course I'm sarcastic as hell, it's appropriate to the culture I was raised in. Now somebody raised on a farm in Iowa may be horrified by sarcasm but unless the board draws up a list of appropriate emotions and how to express them, I am not required to change my normal ways.

Just as the Iowan, for example, is not required to learn how to speak with sarcasm unless and until they move to New York. Both forms of expression, and all the others, are appropriate until the TOS says otherwise.



MasterZen22 -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/19/2008 8:31:27 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: VeryMercurial

I enjoyed this thread on the power of compassion in BDSM.
For some of us {myself included}, this post was taken in great stride
and it appears to be written with good intentions.
I don't think there is anything wrong with considering the power of
compassion in all life situations, including BDSM.
Thank you young MasterZen, for a breath of fresh air.



Thank you Mercurial, I appreciate that a lot. I also enjoyed hearing all the different points of view people expressed.

I was slightly disappointed in myself, because it seems I did not communicate my ideas as fully as I wanted to (but hey nobody’s perfect, lol)

It’s true that the way people interact on the internet forums is what first got me thinking about compassion in bdsm, but I was trying talk about compasion's value in our whole lifestyle, not just in online forums. Some people who read my post may have simply assumed that it was yet another post calling for people to be nicer to each other on the forums, so they gave their stock response, which they’d given a hundred times before. That was not exactly what I was trying to talk about.

I was trying to express my thoughts on the personal benefits to the people who practice to compassion, and how it makes your own life better, not just the life of the person you helped. In my mind, the forums were only a very small part of that point, but the conversation seemed to inevitably slip back to being about the forums. Perhaps talking about civility in the forums had become a habit.

I have to take responsibility for that. I guess I wasn’t clear enough. And the forum was something I was interested in, it just wasn’t my whole point. Oh well. This thread was a learning experience for me and I thank everyone who contributed. Especially Stella, thank you. Your post about your volunteer work was an inspiration.

-Zen




sblady -> RE: The Power of Compassion in BDSM (7/21/2008 7:12:40 AM)

This was a great post.  I agree with the "theory" of compassion online as well as in real life.  But (there's always a but, isn't there), I haven't been around the forum as long as some and agree that it can be rather irritating to see the same inane questions and whining.  Which is why LA has a list of links handy (I appreciate those links, it has stopped me from posting and quite possibly irritating the heck out of others).

The way I show compassion is to ignore certain topics by certain posters who appear to repeat the same mistakes as my patience is limited and I wouldn't want to appear to be rude or snarky or jaded.



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