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kitty44 -> question (6/28/2008 9:13:17 PM)
I was reading and few profiles on here and i came across people stating that they have no limits and looking for the same in a sub or slave . my question is this everyone has some line they wont cross so how can anyone say they dont have any limits can someone help me on that thank you for your help kitty

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: question (6/28/2008 9:15:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kitty44 I was reading and few profiles on here and i came across people stating that they have no limits and looking for the same in a sub or slave . my question is this everyone has some line they wont cross so how can anyone say they dont have any limits can someone help me on that thank you for your help kitty Well usually it's because they don't really understand the scope of "no limits." Most kinky people when they get into the scene think it's going to be exactly like what their fantasies have always been and it takes them awhile to figure out that it tends to be a lot more varied than that. Also, many want to sound ultra cool and hip, and in the scene having fewer limits gives the appearance of being cooler. And many of them simply have no idea how to form a solid stable relationship and are just using buzz words and hot talk to attract some honeybees.

underworld026 -> RE: question (6/28/2008 9:24:33 PM)
Hehe, I was just going to say they're idiots.

wwwkevinww -> RE: question (6/28/2008 9:33:27 PM)
Its theoretically possible to edge-play so much you have no limits. Its not healthy to edge-play too much imho, and people stating they have no limits are pretty clueless..... usually its not just submissives who have limits, its doms also. Alot of doms won't do certain things, because its either just not exciting to them or they find it repulsive.... If you get a dom without limits and a slave without limits together, usually its not going to end pretty.... Sadly, there are people out there who don't have limits, and usually they aren't their own guardians because they have shown they just don't care about themselves enough......

MagiksSlave -> RE: question (6/28/2008 9:34:40 PM)
This is an age old question with absalutly no answer MS

spanklette -> RE: question (6/28/2008 9:41:25 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wwwkevinww Its theoretically possible to edge-play so much you have no limits. Its not healthy to edge-play too much imho, and people stating they have no limits are pretty clueless..... usually its not just submissives who have limits, its doms also. Alot of doms won't do certain things, because its either just not exciting to them or they find it repulsive.... If you get a dom without limits and a slave without limits together, usually its not going to end pretty.... Sadly, there are people out there who don't have limits, and usually they aren't their own guardians because they have shown they just don't care about themselves enough...... How much edge play is too much? My edgeplay may not be your edgeplay, etc. I, for one, think it would be more unhealthy for me not to engage in edgeplay. I would become disatisfied and eventually find the door, I'm sure. I don't consider myself unhealthy, merely satisfied.

crouchingtigress -> RE: question (6/28/2008 9:45:41 PM)
agrees with LA, and less likely but possible they also could be covertly advertising they are into scat and animals but are afraid to say that out right. maybe let them know that are inadvertently raising a giant red flag that they are neophytes, and they might appreciate knowing that, especially if it was done nicely....we were all new once....right? .....then send them to a local munch or here in the forums....

WhatUrSeeking -> RE: question (6/28/2008 9:46:21 PM)
Well usually it's because they don't really understand the scope of "no limits." Most kinky people when they get into the scene think it's going to be exactly like what their fantasies have always been and it takes them awhile to figure out that it tends to be a lot more varied than that. Also, many want to sound ultra cool and hip, and in the scene having fewer limits gives the appearance of being cooler. I think you hit the nail on the head. I read this a lot with newbie submissives saying they have "no limits." Then they make a generic statement about being used, broken, forced to submit etc. Sometimes I think I should just take them up on this "no limits," throw a gag in their mouth, and then help them realize they did have some limits and I just trampled all over those limits. In reality I just ask them about limits even though they claim not to have any. I want true consent and even desire from my submissives. It is dangerous and stupid for subies to post stuff like "I have no limits" when they don't know what they speak of. The hardcore experienced submissive tends to be more explicit about the almost no limits that they have, and then they usually list a limit or two. These are the ones that include desires for watersports, beastiality, scat, scarification, etc.. Generally I find this kind of no limits to be more of a turn-off than anything. I don't want a submissive that truly has no limits. The newbie just thinks it will attract more people. As for a Dominant that posts something like this it just shows their lack of experience. Dominants also have limits.

BitaTruble -> RE: question (6/28/2008 10:18:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kitty44 everyone has some line they wont cross so how can anyone say they dont have any limits can someone help me on that ::partial repost:: These are the major two arguments you will hear on the subjects of limits. If you don't have any limits, you are mentally ill or a liar. If you do have limits you are fake. No matter which way you swing you lose. As the wise Joshua said in War Games, the only way not to lose is not to play so I'm going to give you a little trick right now which should stave off either being thought of as mentally ill or fake. It's a matter of circumstance. In other words, there may very well be things to which I will never consent but which may, by a matter of circumstance, be forced upon me. There may very well be things that I will only consent to do with someone I respect or care about. It's a matter of circumstance. There may be things that I will only consent to do with someone who owns me or who I own. Again, it's a matter of circumstance. MMV

chamberqueen -> RE: question (6/28/2008 11:07:23 PM)
Sometimes those that have no limits are so new to the lifestyle that they haven't been faced with something that they would really prefer not to do. For instance, at a munch tonight I sat next to a man that talked to me about how he trained dogs to be sexual partners. I consider myself to have few limits, but if I was told to participate in a sexual act with a dog I would feel that I needed to draw a line. Some might draw lines at scat, or cross dressing, or any other number of things. Others have a truly "try anything once" attitude and can take it all. However, I have personally never met anyone that had absolutely no limits at all. They may be out there but I'd say they are rare.

Leatherist -> RE: question (6/28/2008 11:11:15 PM)
I hard limit having to listen to small children screeching. [:D]

candystripper -> RE: question (6/28/2008 11:14:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kitty44 I was reading and few profiles on here and i came across people stating that they have no limits and looking for the same in a sub or slave . my question is this everyone has some line they wont cross so how can anyone say they dont have any limits can someone help me on that thank you for your help kitty *Hi kitty; you are correct; the idea of 'no limits' doesn't really* fly in real life. Everyone has things they won't do. There are lots of good threads on the subject you can find by using the 'search' function at the upper right hand corner of the message board page. I think 'no limits' is just CollarMe code for 'extreme'. It's not a term I've seen used anywhere else; it seems like a CM idiosyncrasity. I wouldn't worry too much about it; if you yourself are not a 'true slave with no limits', then when contacted by a Dom seeking that sort of dynamic it's probably best to just say no thank you. Best wishes, candystripper**

hardbodysub -> RE: question (6/28/2008 11:15:15 PM)
Some of them probably just don't know what their limits are, and since the limits aren't solidly defined in their minds, they perceive it as not having limits. For the OP: I think you'd attract more attention if you used a title that actually gave a clue about the topic, rather than titling the topic as "question".

Evility -> RE: question (6/28/2008 11:24:22 PM)
To me a no limits situation is not necessarily some free for all. It's simply a dynamic where the dominant makes the decisions regarding limits instead of the submissive. That is the way we operate and we both really like it that way. She knows I will not kill, maim or dismember her and enjoys turning over that control. It's really not that outlandish of a concept. This topic usually draws all the judgmental idiots out of the woodwork and this thread appears to be no different.

Micromanager -> RE: question (6/28/2008 11:47:21 PM)
I usually translate 'I have no limits' to mean 'I'm masturbating as I type this one-handed', and move on. If a woman tells me she wishes to serve me, and has 'no limits' I generally reply 'O.K. go and rob a bank, and bring me the money.' Robbing a bank must take a LOT of planning. I still haven't heard back from them.

candystripper -> RE: question (6/29/2008 12:11:50 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Evility To me a no limits situation is not necessarily some free for all. It's simply a dynamic where the dominant makes the decisions regarding limits instead of the submissive. That is the way we operate and we both really like it that way. She knows I will not kill, maim or dismember her and enjoys turning over that control. It's really not that outlandish of a concept. This topic usually draws all the judgmental idiots out of the woodwork and this thread appears to be no different. Evility, I got to say, the 'judgmental idiots' you refer to seem, from your prior posts, to include anyone who disagrees with you or appears to have a different POV. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. candystripper

Maya2001 -> RE: question (6/29/2008 4:32:16 AM)
quote: To me a no limits situation is not necessarily some free for all. It's simply a dynamic where the dominant makes the decisions regarding limits instead of the submissive. A no limits situation/dynamics is not the same as having no limits. There is a Dom visiting me next week and I have agreed to a no limits dynamics with him...,he knows my experience level ...he knows what are my hard limits are, what it means is I trust him enough to turn over authority to him based on his experience and knowledge as well as his respect/care for me... I will submit to whatever he asks of me to the intensity he feels I can handle trusting and knowing he would not do anything to harm me physically or metally..... as Eviility stated it is not a free for all...he knows if he takes things beyond what I can handle ..my trust in him would be shattered and the relationship would be over...he is simply asking for the authority to guide how things will be played out for the time of his stay So the context of how the term "no limits" is used is important. I will admit I once had a problem getting my head around those that said they had no limits within their relationships...it took me while to understand what they were saying and I had to get to know this particular Dom well enough to trust him to be able to make that kind of agreement

RavenMuse -> RE: question (6/29/2008 4:43:51 AM)
My girl can honestly say she has no limits.... that doesn't mean there are no limits within the relationship, I have limits, she trusts in My limits to keep her safe, she gave up the right to set her Own limits when she became My property... but she didn't do that without feeling (and it continues because that feeling was accurate) that she could trust Me to keep her safe. When I read a girls profile saying she has no limits, I assume she means the same, that she seeks someone she trusts in that manner so that the notion of her needing limits is negated, His are enough. I would not class Myself as a "no limits Master", I have limits... someone coming to Me as slave, those limits will be enough... if she doesn't trust Me enough for that then she doesn't trust Me enough to be submitting to Me yet anyhow!

gypsygrl -> RE: question (6/29/2008 4:57:51 AM)
quote: My girl can honestly say she has no limits.... that doesn't mean there are no limits within the relationship, I have limits, she trusts in My limits to keep her safe, she gave up the right to set her Own limits when she became My property... but she didn't do that without feeling (and it continues because that feeling was accurate) that she could trust Me to keep her safe. When I read a girls profile saying she has no limits, I assume she means the same, that she seeks someone she trusts in that manner so that the notion of her needing limits is negated, His are enough. I would not class Myself as a "no limits Master", I have limits... someone coming to Me as slave, those limits will be enough... if she doesn't trust Me enough for that then she doesn't trust Me enough to be submitting to Me yet anyhow! Thats about the clearest explanation I've come accross of this idea within an M/s relationship.

MasterHermes -> RE: question (6/29/2008 5:51:45 AM)
No limits means : Adjust your limits by my limits. If there was no conflict between your and your masters limits , then there wouldnt be any limits for him. Enjoy it Hermes

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