RE: D/s slide rulers

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RE: D/s slide rulers - 5/24/2008 12:05:40 PM

CrazyC

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Joined: 9/28/2006
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quote:

Sliding around back and forth between things is confusing for me too...

It's hard for me to fully express what I mean into words, the contrast and comparisons here. I myself actually feel like I'm speaking Japanese at the moment, or a Foreign language.   I'm rereading my own post, I understand the meaning, yet I see where I'm loosing the meaning in what I'm trying to convey.

Damn it, I'm a couple of french fries short of a happy meal.  Somebody pass me a beer, after I haul my soaking wet ass out of the water tank.

What's this thread about?  Relationships packaged as D/s that are niether truely D/s nor Equalitarian in nature, instead a lot of sliding around between the two. In sliding measures with sliding rules, hence a slide ruler.

Think I need to slap myself with one, that is if I still even own one. Think it's stashed in a box in storage space at the moment.

Ok so let's try this....you are talking about a relationship that is one day is D/s but the next day the sub might say "no" or the Dom might not want to take charge? Is that the scale?

Then there would be another scale to concider when looking at this. There comes a point when a Dom can't make all the decisions, because he/she are tired or have too many other stressers in their lives. the same goes for a sub. This is where communication becomes an important part of the relationship.

Just a question for the OP...Do you expect it to be one way all the time? Is a Dom less "domly" if he isn't constantly in charge? Or if one day being extremely demanding makes him hard but every other day he just wants to be your dom?

I think there needs to be a "scale" for any relationship to be healthy. There needs to be communication and understanding where the other person is coming from.

I sall all this knowing though that there comes a point where the extreme changes from one thing to another is no longer healthy. It can become a spiral of hurts and pain, and it can even be abusive if done on purpose.

Is that helpful? is that where you were going with this?

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Post #: 21

RE: D/s slide rulers - 5/24/2008 12:27:18 PM

Owner4SexSlave

Posts: 1311
Joined: 4/4/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CrazyC
Ok so let's try this....you are talking about a relationship that is one day is D/s but the next day the sub might say "no" or the Dom might not want to take charge? Is that the scale?

Somewhat here, I was doing a bit of a comparison of things in previous relationships. The downside was that the last long term one, there were issues. Actually, to the point where her own family suspects she has untreated Bi-Polar disorder. In retrospect when I think back to this whole experience it was a complete D/s nightmare from Hell. Very pick and choose D/s like things that made no sense, heads or tails from one day to the next. Something, that I really care to personally never repeat again. I actually feel I should have stood back and thought a little more before starting this thread. Because of the bad taste this one relationship left in my mouth.

With that being said... I really don't know very well how to explain this any better. Please Ignore this thread, resume life, slam dunk me in the water tank, shot me with a water gun. I need to take a break from this thread.

I will openly admit, the source of faulty logic lies in my posting. Please excuse me folks, I have been having a difficult time with this. It's not the type of relationship I care to ever repeat again.

I actually recieved a long email from her very recently, it has emotionally and mentally touched me in a not so good way.

In fact to the point, that feel I need to take a serious time out from posting on the MB right now. Because I feel my common sense and even my thoughts are not in a good place at the moment.

Excuse me, I feel like a two peckered billy goat in a pig circus right now.

quote:

Then there would be another scale to concider when looking at this. There comes a point when a Dom can't make all the decisions, because he/she are tired or have too many other stressers in their lives. the same goes for a sub. This is where communication becomes an important part of the relationship.

Just a question for the OP...Do you expect it to be one way all the time? Is a Dom less "domly" if he isn't constantly in charge? Or if one day being extremely demanding makes him hard but every other day he just wants to be your dom?

I think there needs to be a "scale" for any relationship to be healthy. There needs to be communication and understanding where the other person is coming from.

I sall all this knowing though that there comes a point where the extreme changes from one thing to another is no longer healthy. It can become a spiral of hurts and pain, and it can even be abusive if done on purpose.

Is that helpful? is that where you were going with this?

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Post #: 22

RE: D/s slide rulers - 5/24/2008 1:11:15 PM

CrazyC

Posts: 949
Joined: 9/28/2006
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Take a break, and no one was judging you here. We were just trying ot figure out where you were coming from. If posting this helped you grasp some understand of what is going on, then it has served it's purpose. Heal, learn, and then come back. Some of us will still be here...:).

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Post #: 23

RE: D/s slide rulers - 5/24/2008 4:46:38 PM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
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quote:

In fact to the point, that feel I need to take a serious time out from posting on the MB right now. Because I feel my common sense and even my thoughts are not in a good place at the moment.

Genuine self examination is never fun, often brutal, but in the long run, infinitely rewarding. I for one, have enjoyed your thought provoking posts and I doubt I am alone in that. Best of luck!

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Post #: 24