Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Needing some advice


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Needing some advice Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 8:00:42 AM   
MasterArywen


Posts: 7
Joined: 1/3/2008
Status: offline 		My partner and I meet over a year and a half ago, over the net like so many that seems too be a trend, but after we finally meet in person things went from her being my online slave too real time. Well shortly after she got pregant and asked if we coudl stop things because she was uncomfortable with it because of the baby so I agreed not wanting her too stress and risk loosing the child like before. Well not the little princess is here in our lives, my partner has expressed she woudl liek too be a submissive or pet mainly in the bedroom apart from teh setting out clothes etc for her.

I guess my biggest thing is how can it go safetly from TCE too simply being a pet? I am not sure how too really go about things and such anymore at this new level of things. I guess I am worried too much of takign things too far.

Anyone have any advice?

Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 8:03:02 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		She will let you know if you go too far. Even though it is D/s, you are still a couple, so, do what you like, and, seek input from her.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to MasterArywen)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 8:11:22 AM   
MasterArywen


Posts: 7
Joined: 1/3/2008
Status: offline 		Thank you blushes, we have discuss a few things but its mainly in the bedroom..and well I am more use too it being more than just the bedroom. I guess I am having problems with the it mostly be sexaul, since that when i first got involed into the lifestyle thats all I thought it was and it took me a very long time too learn other wise.

thank you for your encouragment

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 8:22:24 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		Master Arywen,

Congratulations on your future child!  I wish you all the best.  And let me say, it is soooo refreshing for a man to post a problem like this to the boards.

It sounds as though she doesn't know whether she can handle being your slave and a slave to the baby at the same time.  There is no "magic advice" here.  But I can say that as long as you support her and make sure she is not overwhelmed, she will gain more love and respect for you, and want to please you even more.  How the two of you express that love with a new baby in the house is something you will have to figure out for yourselves.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to MasterArywen)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 8:29:44 AM   
MasterArywen


Posts: 7
Joined: 1/3/2008
Status: offline 		Thank you very much on the congrats. I know there is not any real magic advice I am just wondering if anyoen else might of had this happen in some form or another.

I just want her happy and with us oth workign as well and witht eh baby the timing for me makes it harder too judge when she wants that attention or not..if ou get my meaning.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 8:36:23 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		You could also try giving her an 'assignment' or two once a day, (with some days as special 'days off'), and when she does the assignment, (even if it's not perfect) compliment her, and make her feel good for serving you...do something nice for her too, once in a while. Being made to feel good about helping Master, can be a huge thing for many. (not all need it, but, she might)

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


(in reply to MasterArywen)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 8:52:46 AM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline 		M/A > kids change EVERYTHING , sounds like she wants to still serve , i would say just bring it back slowly .perhaps also give mom some rewards for not only her new role but her role s and dedications to you as well .What new mom  does not dig a spa day from a loving caring Master .Congrats and best wishes .

(in reply to xxblushesxx)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 4:32:04 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Sit and list what you want. Have her sit and list what she wants. See how much you have in common. Then you have a decision to make and, as I see it, your options are:

1) Take what she is willing to give and throw the rest of what you want out the window.
2) Decide that what she's willing to give isn't enough and move on to another monogamous relationship.
3) Consider poly relationships where you get what she doesn't offer from someone else.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to MasterArywen)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 6:54:03 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		The truth is, newborns make the rules. Doesn't matter if you order her to clean the kitchen floor with a toothbrush, if the baby wakes up hungry then she abandons your job to tend the baby. Plus too much stress is not good for an expectant or nursing mother. To have a good milk supply, she simply needs to be like a contented cow, calm in a green meadow not racing around like a border collie. You have to change your priorities to be a good parent.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Needing some advice - 5/19/2008 8:10:12 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		MasterFireMaam said what I was going to say :)

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Needing some advice - 5/20/2008 12:32:00 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

MasterFireMaam said what I was going to say :)


JINX!

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 11
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Needing some advice Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.234