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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 7:30:06 AM

Dnomyar

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Put it this way op. Get a wedding ring if you want a life collar and hope that you don't divorce one day.

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 10:52:39 AM

AquaticSub

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~Fast Reply~

I'd guess that the best way to do your assignment is to start off by saying "There just isn't a set of standard meanings for collars". We don't do the different types of collars (training/consideration/life/etc) though if others choose to, all the better for them. I've never heard of a life collar, though I've seen people jump up and down, cursing about how all collars should only mean that and everyone else is a fake. We regard them as jewelry and only that. Some have deep meaning behind them and some are simply for decoration.

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 11:02:27 AM

DiurnalVampire

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Im with the group that has never heard of anything refered to as a life collar. You may want to ask him if there is anything else it is called, in different circles. What is a life collar in the BDSM lifetyle community in one area might have a different name elsewhere. Ther is no standard guide to collars and their uses, so everyone and everywhere you ask might be slightly different.
I have 2 permanently collared boys. If either of them wished to be released for some reason, I would grant it. We can also not imagine being apart, even if a release was granted. But that is how we want it to be, it is al still becasue they want to stay, and not becasue they are required by their collars to do so.
Good luck with your assignment, ask for more clarification before you beat your head against a brick wall

DV

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VampiresLair

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 11:04:12 AM

felicitousdove

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quote:

"We discussed collars, the different "levels" so to speak, and he mentioned a "Life Collar". He said it was basically a Slave collar, but one that was only released if one of the people involved died. (What marriage used to mean) He told me to research it, to learn as much as possible about the degree of commitment as well as ceremonies, the only assistance he would give was to keep in mind he's very old-fashioned."

I have heard of colars of consideration, training colors, collars of protection and collars of Ownership.

Since this is a term that I, and it seems like many are not familiar with, I tend think: Go back to what he told you, as noted above. This seems to me, to be what HIS definition is. So perhaps he is wanting you to infer more from this term and his definition of it? Based on his definition and what he has told you- what do you get out of it? What meaning or feelings do you get when you hear the term, and the definition as explained by Him?

Just my thoughts.

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 11:09:38 AM

Luciferica

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I don't know what a life collar is, we treat ours as a wedding ring, a lifetime symbol of his commitment to me, to us, and to himself. Ours is simple, I made it myself, taking antique silver conches off a halter that was my grandmother's and a silver ring to hook a lead to, it's pretty and it came from my heart, and it is his for the rest of our lives, as long as we both draw breath. We bound our love, our marriage, and the service he chooses to give to me, as well as my gratitude into this collar to use as a symbol or icon. He can remove it, and in it's place wears a necklace with "Jeff, beloved of Jess" when he's not able to wear the collar itself. Thats as close as I can fathom to a lifetime collar.

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 1:07:21 PM

Stephann

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Is it possible he was asking you a red herring question?

I've never heard of a life collar. It could be he's never heard of one, and wanted you to demonstrate a level of knowledge on the subject to the point where you could also, definitively, state that the concept of life collar doesn't exist in mainstream BDSM society. The reality is, that any collar, no matter how 'permanent' will last for only as long as the person wearing it or the person granting it is committed to maintaining it. The steel around my slave's neck is only there because we both desire it to remain. If she came home tonight without it, and informed me that she stopped by the hardware shop and had it clipped off, then there's a good chance our relationship would be on the fast track towards terminating. It doesn't matter how thick or welded it is, or how thin and delicate the collar is; the value it holds, is the relationship it represents, and not the steel, gold, or twine it's made of.

Stephan

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 1:43:47 PM

Drummerpunk7

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I can learn much from Stephann.

That being said, I don't like the idea of collars that can be taken off at any time, but the slave alone. If a slave requires it to be removed, it should be at the discretion of the master. If grandma is coming over for dinner, the slave should request the master to remove it for the alotted time. The problem with wedding rings is that they are too easily removed. You can't very well hide a steel collar(not easily). If my slave wants to remove her collar, I want to know why.

Not everyone is the same though, so to each his own, and to the slaves, whatever their master says.

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 2:17:11 PM

Stephann

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For what it's worth, I learned a lot from other people as well, Drummer

Take a look at charlotte's profile, and you'll see what her steel collar looks like. It's something that I doubt her grandmother would object to (or even realize what it is.

Regards,

Stephan

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 2:53:10 PM

Drummerpunk7

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Is it an Eternity collar? I was looking at those for my wife. I much like the brushed steel finish.

On another note, you have a lovely slave.

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 2:55:20 PM

Luciferica

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

For what it's worth, I learned a lot from other people as well, Drummer

Take a look at charlotte's profile, and you'll see what her steel collar looks like. It's something that I doubt her grandmother would object to (or even realize what it is.

Regards,

Stephan

I perved you both to look at it, it's lovely and so is she

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 3:46:35 PM

Stephann

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Drummerpunk7

Is it an Eternity collar? I was looking at those for my wife. I much like the brushed steel finish.

On another note, you have a lovely slave.

Yup, sure is. It's also with the brushed steel finish.

And thank you both, Drummer and Luciferica. I'm not a lucky man by any stretch of imagination, so I guess it's karma paying me back

Stephan

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 6:15:07 PM

Goddess2002

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I've never heard of a life collar but I like the idea of it...certainly the term can be added to the plethora of collaring definitions already widely available.

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RE: Life collar questions? - 4/14/2008 10:26:12 PM

chellekitty

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Drummerpunk7

I can learn much from Stephann.

That being said, I don't like the idea of collars that can be taken off at any time, but the slave alone. If a slave requires it to be removed, it should be at the discretion of the master. If grandma is coming over for dinner, the slave should request the master to remove it for the alotted time. The problem with wedding rings is that they are too easily removed. You can't very well hide a steel collar(not easily). If my slave wants to remove her collar, I want to know why.

Not everyone is the same though, so to each his own, and to the slaves, whatever their master says.

in my personal experience, i have gotten to the point where i could not remove a simple buckle on collar (or any other kind) had i wanted to without my Master's permission (i really prefered that he do it) for any reason, even something as simple as it is leather, and i needed to take a shower and it was not locked on and he wasn't home...

for me it wasn't about whether or not it was permanently attached or locked on, it could have been velcro-ed or magnetically attached on, it wouldn't have made a difference, the symbolism for me was i would not remove the symbol of our relationship for any given period of time unless he gave me specific direction to do so myself...but it was still just symbolism...the relationship did not end because i needed to take a shower, or because i was getting in the pool or because grandma - well actually because the primary's parents - were coming over and the tag had his name on it and i was "just a roommate" as far as they were concerned...and all the same, i could not do it, no lock, no permanent attachment needed...

did that make any sense?
chelle

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