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sub jacking - 3/13/2008 1:25:55 PM   
petitespitfire64


Posts: 182
Joined: 10/4/2007
Status: offline 		I recently joined a new BDSM site and found out that a so-called "friend" of mine was advertising that I was HIS submissive. He had posted serveral times, each time mentioning me as HIS.
We had TWO dates...and won't be having another one. I am INCENSED. Have any of you had this happen? How did you deal with it?

Daneene
"The RIGHT thing to do may not be the POPULAR thing to do."
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 1:31:19 PM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		I had someone do something similar once, kept refering to me in blogs I had never met him, I emailed the site hosts and asked them to remove any referance to me and to stop him from doing it, which they did, they check his posts before they show up

_____________________________

Resident Lime(y) Tart
There would be no gossip without secrets
I don't want to be anything other than what I've been trying to be lately

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELvfMJoKDAk

(in reply to petitespitfire64)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 1:46:50 PM   
Lockit


Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		I have recently seen a lot of profiles where someone is mentioning another by nic and not talking nicely about them.  My first thought, besides the thoughts of ass hole, isn't this against the rules is to report the profile, but I don't want to complicate things for those that monitor CM! 

You want to say... who cares... they speak for themselves and their blog or whatever they say about anyone proves they are an idiot, but I can see where it would bother you being the person they are talking about.  Report it.  Mention on your profile that you do not belong to anyone who might claim you might be a thought, but then people might think you have some drama in your life and turn away, even if it isn't your fault.

I really feel for you!  I would email him and confront him, but then he might take it off without the correction from CM.  Whatever the case, I am sure it is a stress to you knowing some freak after a couple of dates thinks he owns you!  This alone gives you good reason to report him...

Good luck to you!

(in reply to colouredin)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 1:50:10 PM   
pinkwind


Posts: 367
Joined: 1/9/2005
Status: offline 		Even if you call it jumping the gun, it is still not right, and could blight your own search for someone who thinks more of you than his own image and ego.

Maybe a private email asking him politely to stop, copy kept, and an assurance rather than a threat that if his exaggeration continues you will feel obliged to post on your own behalf giving the real facts behind your contacts with him.

Most people would stop it there, but if he doesn't then you have three choices. Ignore him and kick him into touch. Post in the same forum to put the record straight, linking any posts he has made concerning yourself, or go to the site admin and ask them to warn him off, giving them links to his posts and a copy of the polite email already sent to him.

Just remember, egos can be huge but fragile, there is no need to make the guy a complete spectacle, but he has to learn, one way or another that this kind of behaviour is not acceptable. Not unusual either, by the way!


(in reply to colouredin)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 1:59:59 PM   
SinergyNstrumpet


Posts: 305
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline 		If it bothers you so much you should contact the site and tell them of the offensive behavior. I do not think I would worry much about it unless he has your personal info and ways to stalk you. Keep your eyes peeled for suspicious activities, such as being followed. I wouldn't worry about it other then that. He is not really hurting you, he is hurting his own chances to meet other women by announcing he owns you.

julia

(in reply to petitespitfire64)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 2:16:34 PM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline 		...this just boggles me.  Maybe I should have said all along that my real body was possessed by the demon calling himself Brad Pitt...



_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

(in reply to SinergyNstrumpet)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 2:24:37 PM   
MichiganHeadmast


Posts: 726
Joined: 8/13/2006
Status: offline 		If I sub-jacked you with consent, would that be sub-letting?

(Okay, stop groaning)

(in reply to petitespitfire64)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 2:31:14 PM   
FRSguy


Posts: 653
Joined: 9/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MichiganHeadmast

If I sub-jacked you with consent, would that be sub-letting?

(Okay, stop groaning)



LMFAO
I dont get why a guy would want someone to think they were with someone when they were not... dosnt make sense...lol

(in reply to MichiganHeadmast)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 2:40:45 PM   
Gwynvyd


Posts: 4949
Status: offline 		That is just so sad.... that is why my subs have my name in thier profile names... Less confusing that way. ( plus a touch of old school BBS )  Gwynsbitchboi and GwynsDemona are mine. *smiles* Simple and easy that way.

I personaly would go to the sysop (report feature) and report the goober. Also send him a polite letter to stop what he is doing, and include it in your letter with his links on the report. Always be above board no matter how slimey he gets. I would also put a blurb in your profile that you are unowned and it is newly updated as of "whatever" date.

Just my thoughts.

Good luck.

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to MichiganHeadmast)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 2:43:57 PM   
petitespitfire64


Posts: 182
Joined: 10/4/2007
Status: offline 		Headmaster, Sir...that is just SOOOOO wrong...lmao!

_____________________________

**Daneene**
"The right thing to do isn't always the popular thing to do"

(in reply to MichiganHeadmast)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 4:16:16 PM   
SubbieOnWheels


Posts: 590
Joined: 12/14/2007
Status: offline 		Headmaster - oh, groan, really loud groan.

Gwyn - "sysop"? I haven't heard that in eons!

Daneene - There's a lot of good advice on this thread already. I'd listen to them. And I wish you the best.

_____________________________

Bethical
Beat me, strike me, take away my reindeer! I'll never tell! -- Walt Kelly, Pogo Possum
I yam what I yam - Popeye

http://www.myspace.com/bethical_wheels


(in reply to petitespitfire64)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 7:29:43 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		 Happens all the time, same sort of name dropping thing.  People exagerrate their experience very regularly in order to sound cooler than they think they actually are.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to SubbieOnWheels)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 7:33:24 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Daneene!!  Who is it, and I'll beat 'em up for you!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 7:58:16 PM   
cjan


Posts: 3513
Joined: 2/21/2008
Status: offline 		Shit. And I thought this thread was gonna be about jackin' subs.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 8:08:00 PM   
LadyLynx


Posts: 1098
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline 		me2 cjan:)

Daneene, whatever you decide to do, good luck with it. yeesh, what an idiot! (the guy of course.)

_____________________________

Our community maybe openminded as a whole, but it is still made up of individuals who bring in their own opinions,baggage and agendas!

Known as SwitchWitch in my local community,and on IRC Bondage.

I also go by the nic SwitchWitch on MDS.

(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 8:27:38 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lumus

...this just boggles me.  Maybe I should have said all along that my real body was possessed by the demon calling himself Brad Pitt...




(I thought he just did that to me).

(in reply to Lumus)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 8:32:49 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cjan

Shit. And I thought this thread was gonna be about jackin' subs.


maybe we could make arrangements....LOL

_____________________________

...Look into my eyes and I'll own you....



(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 8:36:30 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lumus

...this just boggles me.  Maybe I should have said all along that my real body was possessed by the demon calling himself Brad Pitt...




mmmmm yet another reason we need to team up in the ultimate dominate power....(evil laugh)....LOL

_____________________________

...Look into my eyes and I'll own you....



(in reply to Lumus)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 8:45:54 PM   
Real_Trouble


Posts: 471
Joined: 2/25/2008
Status: offline 		I can honestly say nobody has ever tried to falsely claim me as their submissive.

Ahem.

But that does sound like a bitch, to say the least.  At least you found out quickly.


_____________________________

Send lawyers, guns, and money.

(in reply to DrkJourney)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: sub jacking - 3/13/2008 8:52:42 PM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: petitespitfire64

I recently joined a new BDSM site and found out that a so-called "friend" of mine was advertising that I was HIS submissive. He had posted serveral times, each time mentioning me as HIS.
We had TWO dates...and won't be having another one. I am INCENSED. Have any of you had this happen? How did you deal with it?

Daneene


He didn't want you... he wanted the bike.... I don't blame him one bit that bike is smokin.

BadOne

_____________________________

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

According to SwithNSpanky
We are all so very lucky to have you with us to impart your great wisdom.

(in reply to petitespitfire64)
Profile   Post #: 20
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