RE: male psychology question

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: male psychology question

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> RE: male psychology question

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: male psychology question - 2/14/2008 1:11:20 PM

Muttling

Posts: 1612
Joined: 9/30/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen

- Third, there is a need to keep secrets about some things (which I’m not prepared to disclose) – or at least to maintain the illusion that he has secrets, for his wife knows about the matter. Again, this urge to keep some things to himself I believe arises from a need to maintain independence in some way.

I think that I can provide some insight into this one.

We ALL have details that others know about, yet we remain uncomfortable discussing them. How many women refuse to admit (even to their spouses) that they masterbate? (This is not so much an issue within the kink community, but it's quite common to vanillas.)

It's a matter of comfort. The person expects to be attacked, criticized, or otherwise get disapproval from the other so they lie about the behavior in an attempt to hide the conflict. The other accepts the avoidance without questioning it as they are equally uncomfortable with the conflict.

IME, instead of burying it you are planting a seed and a tree of conflict will grow from it.

I think the problem exists on the parts of both parties. The lier who is attempting to hide part of himself (in this case) from their partner and the partner who makes the discussion so difficult that niether want to admit it exists.

(in reply to LadyEllen)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: male psychology question - 2/14/2008 1:48:20 PM

Rule

Posts: 10479
Joined: 12/5/2005
Status: offline

Seems to me a rather good description and analysis.

So: male midlife crisis. Old and nothing of male value achieved yet. Has to sit and listen to the inane blathering of females. (Sorry E.)

Solution: get away from the females, start martial art classes or something other male, go climb a couple of mountains, travel to the north or south pole, cross the Pacific on a raft, beat up some asshole, do something male to be proud off. Live!

(in reply to LadyEllen)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: male psychology question - 2/14/2008 1:51:45 PM

Muttling

Posts: 1612
Joined: 9/30/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rule

Solution: get away from the females, start martial art classes or something other male, go climb a couple of mountains, travel to the north or south pole, cross the Pacific on a raft, beat up some asshole, do something male to be proud off. Live!

Start him out easy.....

http://pi.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/snow.html

(in reply to Rule)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: male psychology question - 2/14/2008 2:11:02 PM

Zensee

Posts: 1564
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline

It's genetics. I'd suggest the general difference in male and female attitudes in this matter come from our different reproductive strategies as evolved in the murky mists of the past.

Women face the extended and complicated responsibility of raising human children (with the longest infancy in the animal realm). Forming cohesive, cooperative groups is a necessity for them (it takes a village to raise a child etc.). Men have a bit more latitude and are caught between the wild oats strategy and remaining as part of the troop to maximise the survival of his offspring.

While some individual males represent the extremes of these strategies (cavalier and stay-at-home) most men vacillate in a subconscious, internal negotiation between the two conflicting compulsions. Their odd behaviour is the symptom of this inner conflict.

Z.

_____________________________

"Before enlightenment, chop wood and carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood and carry water." (proverb)

(in reply to Muttling)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: male psychology question - 2/14/2008 3:07:23 PM

Jeffff