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Cats and Dogs.... - 2/11/2008 5:57:21 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline 		(From a friend of mine....who I tend to agree with).

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About my pets:

1. They live here.  You don't...and I have far too many of them...and thankfully...too few of you.

2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it "fur"niture.

(Das riiiight).

3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.

You, I like....but I'm still debating things....and my cat gives me pussy.
 
(Although I have to shake it off at about 2:30 a.m.)

4. To you, they are an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.
 
(My friend is a woman...and she knows all about this shit...but I'm a guy....cats are "she's"....dogs are "he's").
 
I got cats.

Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1. Eat less

2. Don't ask for money all the time

3 Are easier to train

4. Normally come when called (okay....this may not be entirely accurate).

5. Never ask to drive the car

6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends

7. Don't smoke or drink (Okay...this may not be entirely accurate as well....but I'm still missing at least 3 cartons of Marlboros)....

8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions

9. Don't want to wear your clothes

10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and...

11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children

(Okay....I didn't write this...but I have to say....with the exception of #11....this reminds me of my ex wife).....

(And frankly...I'd like to see some state legislative changes on this one)....

< Message edited by Griswold -- 2/11/2008 6:01:30 PM >
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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/11/2008 6:13:41 PM   
TheHeretic


Posts: 19100
Joined: 3/25/2007
From: California, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold



7. Don't smoke or drink (Okay...this may not be entirely accurate as well....but I'm still missing at least 3 cartons of Marlboros)....





          Not entirely true.  I've never come up shy a pack of Camels, but if you set a margarita on the floor next to your chair or on a low table, my dog will drink out your glass every time.  He doesn't like bourbon though.

_____________________________

If you lose one sense, your other senses are enhanced.
That's why people with no sense of humor have such an inflated sense of self-importance.


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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/11/2008 6:16:57 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHeretic

quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold



7. Don't smoke or drink (Okay...this may not be entirely accurate as well....but I'm still missing at least 3 cartons of Marlboros)....





         Not entirely true.  I've never come up shy a pack of Camels, but if you set a margarita on the floor next to your chair or on a low table, my dog will drink out your glass every time.  He doesn't like bourbon though.


(Lush).

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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/11/2008 6:32:50 PM   
TheHeretic


Posts: 19100
Joined: 3/25/2007
From: California, USA
Status: offline 		      But at least he's a happy drunk...


      This is one of my favorite emails.  I've had it several times, and always pass it around again.

_____________________________

If you lose one sense, your other senses are enhanced.
That's why people with no sense of humor have such an inflated sense of self-importance.


(in reply to Griswold)
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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/11/2008 6:34:27 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Griswold

11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children



LMAO 

That one was very funny.  We have a house of 5 cats, one dog and 4 children.  Thankfully, the pets are all fixed and won't get pregnant.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/11/2008 7:51:27 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		#5 is not accurate. I clearly remember the ums and I walking out of the ice cream place to find the dog in the driver's seat, paws on the wheel, and a crowd of admirers around her. Luckily I had the keys in my pocket. Unfortunately I didn't have a camera.

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/11/2008 8:28:45 PM   
justdavid


Posts: 30
Joined: 7/19/2005
From: Saint Joseph, MO
Status: offline 		Thank you for the post I enjoyed it very much.

Everytime my Mom comes to visit she complains about my cats being on the furniture and I always reply you are invited they live here.

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I am not a know it all. I just play one in cyber.

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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/12/2008 5:34:21 PM   
Griswold


Posts: 2739
Joined: 2/12/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TheHeretic

     But at least he's a happy drunk...



(That is, actually, a truly spectacular point).

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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/12/2008 5:54:33 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		they dont want to wear your clothes but they certainly want to pluck them and make many large holes.  especially if its cotton made.

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I did not reply to your cmail.
I am flawed.
Imperfect.
MUST SPANK!!!
SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/12/2008 7:51:34 PM   
SubbieOnWheels


Posts: 590
Joined: 12/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl

they dont want to wear your clothes but they certainly want to pluck them and make many large holes.  especially if its cotton made.

They may not want to wear your clothes, but they want you to wear their fur on your clothes 

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Bethical
Beat me, strike me, take away my reindeer! I'll never tell! -- Walt Kelly, Pogo Possum
I yam what I yam - Popeye

http://www.myspace.com/bethical_wheels


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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/12/2008 8:07:21 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		FR~

I never feel fully dressed if my clothing doesn't have SOME cat hair on it...*grin*


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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/12/2008 8:09:53 PM   
lauren0221


Posts: 681
Joined: 8/29/2006
Status: offline 		I try to have a white cat and a black cat at all times - that way the cat hair shows no matter what you're wearing:)

(Am down a white cat currently, but expect one to show up at the door any day now.)

(in reply to GreedyTop)
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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/12/2008 8:16:08 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		I have one that is black (with singlewhite hairs scattered randomly on her back, and white armpits), and a white/tabby combo. So, no matter what I wear, it's sure to show...LOL

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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/12/2008 8:46:36 PM   
Maya2001


Posts: 1656
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
Status: offline 		After getting thru the teenage years with one son ...4 dogs  and sometimes foster ones are far less work and hassle and sure is a heck of a lot quieter

9. Don't want to wear your clothes
 preworn clothing in particular undergarments is irresistable and the best time for a puppy to root through the laundry hamper is when you are busy with company lol nothing like having a game of tug of war or a game of catch me if you can infront of company to retrieve your underwear

 


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Lead me not into temptation - I can find the way myself

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RE: Cats and Dogs.... - 2/14/2008 1:47:56 PM   
soul2share


Posts: 7084
Joined: 12/18/2007
From: somewhere out there.....
Status: offline 		As far as clothes go, I have a cat with light hair, and 2 with dark hair....I swear they can shed specific colors on demand based on the color of the clothes they are laying on!

And why is it, in a room full of people, the cats will find the ONE cat-hater in the bunch, and make pests of themselves?  I had one that would hop up into the lap of a grandma, and go to sleep....she was a good sport about it, tho......even missed her when she was gone.

_____________________________

I have to stop saying "How stupid can you be?"...people are starting to take it as a challenge!

*Not a fuck was given.*

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