The beginning

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leatherzack -> The beginning (12/17/2007 1:49:12 AM)
Could Y/you please tell me how Y/you discovered and entered the Lifestyle ?

MasterFireMaam -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 2:51:31 AM)
My first conscious, deliberate interaction with the lifestyle was when I watched, "Exit to Eden" and wanted to be HER (Lisa). I've learned over the years that what I was initially drawn to in her isn't me...and what I overlooked the first time around really is. Like most people, I learned in private through reading and looing at things on the internet. Believe me, by the time I went into the lifestyle publically, I had a lot of things about myself that I had to unlearn. I'm still unlearning! The internet was both a boon and a curse for me. My first public thing was a MAsT meeting in 2001. The Chapter Director at that time is still a good friend of mine as is his former slave (they have a good after-collar relationship as well). Master Fire

spanklette -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 3:06:19 AM)
I was invited to a party that turned out to be a play party. That was the first time that I had been involved in any public sense, but I had done some reading and such before. Anyway, the energy at the party just felt right...I know, it's pretty boring but that's about it.

peppermint -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 3:59:44 AM)
I discovered the lifestyle in a CompuServe chat room while playing a trivia game with a group of other people. It was several years later before i entered the lifestyle due to family obligations. I met some people from Collarme who were real time. Finally got to attend my first munch with them. Then i attended a week long kinky campout where i met my Dom. The hardest part of it all was making that first connection with a real time person. After that the ball was rolling.

canupleaseme -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 4:27:00 AM)
I had my own curiosity about it for years but never did anything about it due to circumstances at home. Then a close friend decided she wanted to learn how to use a strap on properly for her partner and asked if I would go with her to a local dungeon that gave classes on alsorts of things. I went with her but decided to do a bondage class instead. I ended up working there for 2 years on and off and really enjoyed it but didnt get enough personal satisfaction. I then used the internet to meet others and learn more about it and had about 6 casual play partners both male and female. When I realsied this was me and how I wanted to live my life I started my search for a partner. I also had a session as a sub to see what it was like and be able to understand more how they feel and I absoluetly hated it lol I even punched the guy after and now wont go near canes at all , bad bad bad experience. As a result I firmly knew who I was and its gone from there.Its the best thing I ever did I really couldnt be happier and neither could my boy. But god I still have so so much to learn [:)]

bipolarber -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 5:25:24 AM)
It always seemed, out on the playground, I was the kid who would end up getting tied to a tree when playing "War" or "Cowboys and Indians." Unfortunately, I was in the middle of Nowhere, IL. So I didn't really look into my desires until I was old enough to live on my own. I moved to Denver when I was 18, and began a lot of sexual experimentation. Swingers groups, gay bath houses, contact papers and finally, I went to a couple of meetings of a group called DADS (Denver Area Doms and Subs) There I had one of those "lights going on over your head" moments. DADS imploded shortly thereafter, but when I heard a PEP groups was going to form in its place, I immediately volunteered to help run it... Those were easily the best times of my life.

Dnomyar -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 6:31:47 AM)
I came about it thru yahoo group. Found a local Dom now my best friend looking for some help with his subs. I didnt know what a sub was let alone about this lifestyle.

LadyLynx -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 7:08:53 AM)
had a friend that used to talk about it, years later I decided to satisfy my curiousity, and look it up online, (like going to a garage sale, looking thru alot of junk to find the gems.) Found that there was a bdsm chatroom on Literotica, and thru there I found out about munches, looked up Detroit Munches,found yahoo groups, (thank god found that I was close enough to a community!) and here I am! (a year and 3 months later.)

tanzur -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 7:31:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leatherzack Could Y/you please tell me how Y/you discovered and entered the Lifestyle ? An ex got me involved.

IrishMist -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 7:50:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leatherzack Could Y/you please tell me how Y/you discovered and entered the Lifestyle ? What lifestyle? I don't live a 'lifestyle'. I live life. That's all.

RCdc -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 7:55:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: IrishMist quote: ORIGINAL: leatherzack Could Y/you please tell me how Y/you discovered and entered the Lifestyle ? What lifestyle? I don't live a 'lifestyle'. I live life. That's all. I wasn't going to answer this because I felt the same IM. the.dark.

TMaster2 -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 8:02:03 AM)
I guess, like most, I felt the "inner stirrings" at quite a young age, but it wasn't until I was in college, in the early '70s, that it surfaced for what it was/is. I remember being with a girlfriend, going at her from behind, and spanking her quite unexpectedly (for her -- we had never talked about spanking or anything like that.) She came almost immediately. So I continued... I was hooked. My inner feelings had found an outlet with someone who enjoyed them, and I have enjoyed them since ;) I don't know if this is really the "lifestyle" you asked about -- I don't belong to any groups or go to any BDSM social functions, but that is how it started with me, nonetheless. edited to correct morning misspelling.

ctrlaltdelete -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 8:06:48 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leatherzack Could Y/you please tell me how Y/you discovered and entered the Lifestyle ? The moment that you can make breathing, eating, drinking or sleeping a choice instead of an innate necessity to survive is the same moment that you can call BDSM a (lifestyle) choice. I am me. I am not denying myself who and what I need to be. Therefore I am dominant in the relationships that I choose to enter.

Missokyst -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 8:07:16 AM)
I was already doing this since my teen years. I didn't know it wasn't normal, or that people considered it a lifestyle until the internet became popular. Then I thought I was a freak for a while because this had been normal stuff. I got over that. Kyst

Leatherist -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 8:10:24 AM)
Walt Disney showed Hayley Mills in bondage. It went downhill from there.

LadyPact -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 11:09:10 AM)
Years ago, My first slave asked Me to be his Mistress. It was actually him that introduced Me. The rest, as they say, is history.

DarkDaddyZ -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 12:24:50 PM)
~fr~ I DJ'd a fetish event in Tokyo when I lived there in the mid 80s at age 18. Though it wasn't a BDSM community there were some cool visual scenes going on. In 1990 I met a Domme at a gay bar (the Brown Derby in Clarksville, TN). I was attending with a friend of mine in the military who was afraid to go alone because she was afraid she'd get caught (this was before Don't Ask, Don't Tell). That night I was invited to the Domme's house the next night and I went.

DesFIP -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 12:31:49 PM)
I have always had an interest in bondage during sex, the ex was uncomfortable with it so we never did it. At the end of the marriage, which ended for entirely other reasons, I went looking for some bondage porn and typed bondagedotcom into my browser. I discovered very little written porn of any quality, but a ton of info and leads to other info. I bought books and read them, read the fora, read through the checklists and identified what I needed. Only at that point did I fill out my profile and begin to talk to people. I wrote to a couple of subs with whom I had things in common, vanilla things, and struck up acquaintances. I also then had people to ask advice of in the BDSM field. And then I weeded through the obviously unsuitable responses until I finally started talking to someone with whom I had a great deal of surface compatibility with. At which point I talked to him about the things I knew were deal breakers and must haves. We were compatible there also so we just became friends. Now we're lovers and have been for four years. I found a dominant, best friend, bondage top, lover - all in one.

AFlyInYourWeb -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 12:34:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leatherzack Could Y/you please tell me how Y/you discovered and entered the Lifestyle ? Attending college in the late Sixties, I went to a lot of anti-war rallies. I kept bumping into a certain professor from the Nursing school. For some odd reason, she was attracted to me. One day, I became the teacher's pet. I didn't even have a word to label what we did together until several years after the fact.... Thank the Goddess for my dumb, blind luck!!

ItalianSMistress -> RE: The beginning (12/17/2007 1:20:50 PM)
I did not grow up with fantasies of BDSM like so many people in the lifestyle do. I did not know really anything about it until I was 18. I was introduced to this lifestyle I find is different than most. I was young, and had a boyfriend, and a girlfriend, and was sexually bored. A friend was using this dating site, one that was just local to our area. I saw it had some kind of alt area, so I thought hey, what an idea. All I said on the ad was that I was looking for something kinky and different. I replied to two of the messages I got back. One was a crossdresser, and the other a submissive male. I had ongoing relations with both of them for a while. With the male sub for about four years, he was a very well trained slave by the end of it. To My surprise, when that ended, I decided to look for a slave again, wow, I had no idea how many there were, LOL.

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