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thetammyjo -> RE: just wondering (12/10/2007 9:28:25 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Gardenista quote:
ORIGINAL: EvilKitty I've been very appreciative of the time I spent as a sub/bottom. I started out with an Old Leather gay crowd, so beginning by bottoming was sort of a given. I officially subbed for 1 1/2 years & tried to find a submissive side of myself. No go. But I still felt like learning what I was doing to another's head when I play by experiencing it firsthand. Wouldn't trade the time for anything! I think it helped make me as good a Domme as I am today. I've seen the advantages of learning from the bottom first. I've also seen Dommes & Doms who never tried it & I've seen their lacks. I don't think this is an absolute by any means. Some of us learn differently than others. But, in MY opinion, starting off as a bottom is an excellent way to learn. Lady Cat I was actually wondering if that particular myth had it's roots in the Old Guard. Not being very familiar with Leather history at all, I'm also wondering if we're dealing with a definition shift here. Like, maybe a sub "back then" meant more of a "bottom" today. Not saying I agree with it, just saying that " To be a good top, be a good bottom first" makes more sense, if you look at top/bottom play as the art of sensation or pain play. See I don't think that makes much sense either. How can you learn to flog, cut, bind, etc from having it done to you? Can you see what is being done? Not always. Are you told the why or how? Probably not. I found that I learned best when I apprenticed and learned from someone who demonstrated, explained, helped me do it, watched me do and critiqued me, and then further practice on my own.
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