RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women?

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RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 3:22:01 PM

exquisitefeline1

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Well my sex drive is high regardless of relationship, out of relationship i am a cat on a hot tin roof, and at times i have even lowered my standards to have sex, but i usually feel shit after.
I still don't think you are comparing the drive of men and women, i think it is a comparison of psychology, just because, generally, women dont look for sex in the same way as men, but there are women out there who are out for the cheap thrill of getting off for the sake off getting off with a random. However what you are talking about in online pursuits and prostitution, does not equate to a true sex drive, i am not talking off quick fix fucks. i believe that is more a psychological fixation, as really how much pleasure can one obtain from that comparative to hours of sustainable pleasure with one you actually like. I will go with sexyred1 and say it is a selective thing.
So i am now clearer on the drive, it is a psychological thing, not gender driven. i know plenty of women who refuse to sex their man as punishment, and i know plenty of men who refuse to speak to their woman all day, then expect the on button immediately after getting to bed, one gf says that she would rather get up and do the washing in that case. Sex is about many things to different people, i guess it is just how you have psychologically set yourself up.

I wouldn't say i was out of the norm in any degree, we dont even see each other everyday, however i have expectations, and i get bored easily...

(in reply to petdave)

Post #: 21

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 4:34:06 PM

petdave

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quote:

ORIGINAL: exquisitefeline1
i know plenty of women who refuse to sex their man as punishment

Ooh, i forgot all about that example, thanks.

Hey, i guess if you've made up your mind, there's nothing left to do but get back to yer baking

(in reply to exquisitefeline1)

Post #: 22

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 4:56:43 PM

ThinkingKitten

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Joined: 6/15/2006
From: Ontari-ari-o
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FR: Just on the evening news - 43% of women admit to having NO sex drive (N. American study). Obviously we're looking at a somewhat biased subset of the population on this site...... (I'd give the link but the URL is 5 miles long). Its at www.toronto.ctv.ca (Lifetime report)

FYI: apart from the stress, relationship trouble, medications and such being the usual suspects for the absence of libido, a lot of the time its apparently due to low testosterone levels in the female.

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(in reply to petdave)

Post #: 23

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 6:40:06 PM

Greylynn

Posts: 575
Joined: 11/4/2007
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Well the males in my family tend to take a nap after being stuffed, so I wouldn't be on a cooking frenzy.

Is he on any medications that may lower his sex drive?

If all else fails, once he's alseep, tie his ass down....

(in reply to samboct)

Post #: 24

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 6:43:01 PM

exquisitefeline1

Posts: 69
Joined: 9/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: petdave

quote:

ORIGINAL: exquisitefeline1
i know plenty of women who refuse to sex their man as punishment

Ooh, i forgot all about that example, thanks.

Hey, i guess if you've made up your mind, there's nothing left to do but get back to yer baking

Seems like i may have made up my mind, but yeh know, i am always open to hearing what other think and feel...
baking! i am over that...

i wish there was a BDSM community in my town... i am bored as...

(in reply to petdave)

Post #: 25

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 6:45:03 PM

exquisitefeline1

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Joined: 9/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ThinkingKitten

FR: Just on the evening news - 43% of women admit to having NO sex drive (N. American study). Obviously we're looking at a somewhat biased subset of the population on this site...... (I'd give the link but the URL is 5 miles long). Its at www.toronto.ctv.ca (Lifetime report)

FYI: apart from the stress, relationship trouble, medications and such being the usual suspects for the absence of libido, a lot of the time its apparently due to low testosterone levels in the female.

how about that... answers in the ethers ...

so maybe i have high testosterone....k, maybe i should spend the weekend rock climbing instead....

(in reply to ThinkingKitten)

Post #: 26

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 8:11:02 PM

FangsNfeet

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We're all horny. We both pocess hormones that tell us to fuck and be fucked. Sex/Reproduction is the best way to insure a species or races survival.

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(in reply to exquisitefeline1)

Post #: 27

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 10:56:05 PM

RoninTyger

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Joined: 12/12/2006
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Okay this may get me in trouble but it is aimed at know one! the harder it is to aquier something the more we desire it. so as we grow older women want sex more as it becomes harder to obtain, younger women can get sex whenever they want so they desire relationships. young men okay older men as well think they might never get any again so that is all they think of yes i am a man and if betty white said lets do it i would. i am male i have no shame like a male dog i will hump anything if it holds still long enough. women look for a quality mate to give them the best offspring but if they want just sex that is easy for a girl since we are programmed that way from birth. okay that is the short version. as for the main question i'd say either stress or you just broke him well something broke him hope this helps in some way! michael

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Post #: 28

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 11:21:20 PM

exquisitefeline1

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Joined: 9/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: samboct

Hey -did everybody forget about Viagra? Never mind cooking for the guy and making him fatter- just feed him a little blue pill. Plus, a lot of people are more turned on when they're physically hungry as well- your nose generally works better too. Or maybe you need to work on your technique a bit- announcing you're horny may work with a teenager no matter how you're dressed- but some guys appreciate the effort that gals go through to get dolled up for them- and hence it's hard to disappoint them when they do.

Another possibility- and this is less pleasant- is that he's mad at you or bored- and just isn't that interested. It's why stepping out in a relationship is so common- nature made it very, very easy for females to scratch tha particular itch- and maybe it's time to consider somebody else.

Sam

Interesting on the hunger thing... i guess that could be an instinct like what plants get in droughts... reproduce quickly
No pills... he does not have that problem...
i know when he is mad at me, he is moody...
hey and scratching which itch...? bored and angry? Nah, i can tell those kind of men a mile off, and stay away from those types...

Sam i am... go eat green eggs and ham... jeez remember how sensitive girls are... i can create enough of my own paranoid thought and worry thanks...
We spoke... he said he is tired a lot, and feels unproductive with the other things that are important to him, and that i am a greedy, greedy little girl, who doesn't know when to stop... oh and he also said i am more of a turn on when i am just being myself...

i realize what i am craving, my insatiable appetite needs some Dominance, Discipline and Punishment.... we have been a bit vanilla for a while, but it is never quite the same when i ask for Dominance, i like the shock and surprise...
i'm off to listen to some Kasey Chambers so i can practice my little girl voice....maybe that will inspire him...

(in reply to samboct)

Post #: 29

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/15/2007 11:32:37 PM

exquisitefeline1

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Joined: 9/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RoninTyger
... or you just broke him well something broke him hope this helps in some way! michael

ha ha, that is what he says all the time! That he is broken now...he he

(in reply to RoninTyger)

Post #: 30

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 1:23:11 PM

SrMichael

Posts: 10
Joined: 11/11/2007
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Sex drive waxes and wanes - in both sexes, and there is a natural varience in the amount of drive in any normal individual.
That being said, if you have calmly discussed it, considered the things that may be inhibitting his libido, tried all of the ussual enticements, ect, as well as given him time to feel it without pressure, and the difference in levels of desire are still creating a problem, then it may be time to look for someone with a more compatible base line of sexual energy.
Before doing that, however, you may want to wiegh the importance of consistant mutual sexual gratification against all other aspects of your relationship
SrMichael

(in reply to exquisitefeline1)

Post #: 31

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 4:34:56 PM

happypervert

Posts: 2203
Joined: 5/11/2004
From: Scranton, PA
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quote:

FR: Just on the evening news - 43% of women admit to having NO sex drive (N. American study).

"Admit"? I doubt it. I suspect the proportion is far smaller, and the others just aren't interested in fucking the slobs they married.

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Post #: 32

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 4:57:43 PM

SeeksOnlyOne

Posts: 2012
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee

quote:

ORIGINAL: exquisitefeline1

A little off the subject of BDSM, but sex related.

My bf has been complaining that i want too much sex. i told my mum, that this is a common complaint with the men in my life. Mum's reply- "I am heading to 60 and I ain't ever heard no man complain about that, you are obviously not feeding him enough."
So i have hardly left the kitchen baking pies, cakes, brownies, bread and dropping platters off...

Good god does that work? ~Makes a note to pick up some cookbooks~

Seriously, nothing that you feel is wrong or a "mania." Don't, please surpress it! Live it!!!

tis true.....most days.......

full belly and empty balls equals happy man

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Post #: 33

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 5:24:20 PM

lusciouslips19

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Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline

speaking of Viagra, I was at a workshop through OSHA. Learning about infectious disease for my work at a medical vocational school. Did you know that one of the largest increases in Aids is with the senior population in nursing homes???? I swear its true!

(in reply to samboct)

Post #: 34

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 5:26:44 PM

lusciouslips19

Posts: 9792
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Dear, I feel you.
well actually as an oversexed women in her 40's, I feel myself.
ALOT!!!

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

Post #: 35

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 5:47:49 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
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I think it's an overgeneralization thing. There are women with bigger sexual appetites than men, and there are men with bigger sexual appetites than women. With over three billion of each sex in the world, you're going to find a pretty broad range of experiences.

quote:

ORIGINAL: exquisitefeline1

But what do other people think, is there imbalances in the sexuality of men and women? Could it be a gender thing or more of an inhibition thing?

(in reply to exquisitefeline1)

Post #: 36

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 5:55:24 PM

lusciouslips19

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Well, I did read something about Gorean. To find a Kajira she must be a slut. She is kept in submission through sex. They also said sluts are born that way. this I believe to be true. I have always been sexual. Its who I am. I choose to operate as an ethical slut.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 37

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 11:03:50 PM

exquisitefeline1

Posts: 69
Joined: 9/13/2007
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I humbly apologize petdave. You were right, i am so dumped. i thought i was an interesting person enough to keep someone curious despite my sexuality. However, my worry and paranoia is not without reason, and i should have known, if someone voices their commitment to me, as well as back it up with the right action, i am not worried, but i never received that.

"Sex drive waxes and wanes - in both sexes, and there is a natural varience in the amount of drive in any normal individual.
That being said, if you have calmly discussed it, considered the things that may be inhibitting his libido, tried all of the ussual enticements, ect, as well as given him time to feel it without pressure, and the difference in levels of desire are still creating a problem, then it may be time to look for someone with a more compatible base line of sexual energy.
Before doing that, however, you may want to wiegh the importance of consistant mutual sexual gratification against all other aspects of your relationship
SrMichael "

i agree totally, and i am patient. we have discussed many things, however i can not seem to get anything that is real from him, i am unsure if is meaning to have a lack of integrity, or if he is unable to communicate his true feelings. All i got is a lot of "Not you, is me, its your responsibilities..." baloney. Not just a straight "I dont want to be with you."
Consistent sexual gratification is important to the intimacy of maintaining a relationship, however i am not in the favor of dumping someone just because they are not meeting my needs this week or this month. it is not who i am, simple. It is not that important. The important parts are the commitment, integrity to be in truth to the commitments, and the joys that you share as a couple, which i thought were alright, however my opinion is not shared.
Today is a sad day, i lost another love of my life, when finally i thought i had found something real.
Thankyou all for your contributions.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

Post #: 38

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/17/2007 11:29:26 PM

Vendaval

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Beers and bong hits!

quote]ORIGINAL: Greylynn

Is he on any medications that may lower his sex drive?

[/quote]

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(in reply to Greylynn)

Post #: 39

RE: Sex drive. Driven by men or women? - 11/18/2007 1:56:21 AM

exquisitefeline1

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Joined: 9/13/2007
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yep forgot about those ones

Beers and bong hits!

quote:

< Message edited by exquisitefeline1 -- 11/18/2007 1:58:57 AM >

(in reply to Vendaval)

Post #: 40

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