Doms speaking bad about others

Doms speaking bad about others (Full Version)

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grlneedstolearn -> Doms speaking bad about others (10/26/2007 10:48:23 PM)
Just a rant i have to let go: i have been talking with a Dom for a couple months now and he knows very little of what my current Dom and i do, which i feel is no one's business unless of course i decide to post on here. Why do Dom's feel like they know what is best for the sub/slave if they don't know their Dom? i had an interesting conversation earlier about that where he said that my Dom sends up red flags all over the place. Excuse me, but i will choose when i want his help, and he's helping me out of concern, even if i don't take his offerings. My Dom has helped me with grocery shopping, misc. buying such as laundry soap, dishwater soap, etc. He raises no red flags with me in anyway, we've been together for 8 1/2 months now and he's always been faithful to me and vice versa. i don't the one Dom from earlier to tell me why i should not be with my current Dom. Thanks for letting me vent

mnottertail -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/26/2007 10:54:54 PM)
Ja, it is a bitch, toss your cell phone in the toilet and dont have quite so many meaningful conversations with the world at large..........get a handle on what you can do. Ron

SimplyMichael -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/26/2007 11:13:55 PM)
Threads like this just make me want to take a shower.

InkedMaster -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 5:36:00 AM)
So why are you "talking" with another Dom when you already HAVE a Dom?

slaveluci -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 5:42:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: InkedMaster So why are you "talking" with another Dom when you already HAVE a Dom? My question, exactly, InkedMaster. If this other dom bothers the OP so much, why the hell doesn't she quit speaking with him? Been with one dom for 8.5 months and are so happy? Stop talking about it with the other guy and you won't have to worry what his comments are. Geesh[8\|], not hard to figure out..........luci

MisPandora -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 5:55:00 AM)
Stupid question......so why, if you have a dominant, are you busy chatting it up with another one, especially one who is so blatantly disrespectful of your master's property? And in the interest of transparency, does your dom know you're chatting it up with this dimwit?

TheChauvinist -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 6:07:51 AM)
Just because one is in a relationship does not mean all contact with the opposite orientation should stop. I think this second "Dom" is posing as a friend in order to try to pull tactics such as he is. I.E. pointing out "flaws" in her mate and trying to split her off from him for himself. Such underhandedness is a pime indicator of the persons character that he is most likely hiding.

MsPleasure -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 6:08:23 AM)
You decided to share whats going on in your relationship with other Dom. Men tend to want to fix things, instead of listen. If the other Dom is experienced and a friend warning you for your own good, take heed. We all can think back when our parents warned us of things that we blew off only to find out that they were right. Your other option is to cut ties if you don't like what he's saying...the choice is yours.

KatyLied -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 6:11:05 AM)
quote: My Dom has helped me with grocery shopping, misc. buying such as laundry soap, dishwater soap, etc. I could dig that sort of dynamic. As long as he buys a lot of food and it's all the name brand stuff.

Squeakers -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 6:32:25 AM)
If you are happy in your relationship, why bother defending it to someone who obviously is not going to agree with you anyway.

julietsierra -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 6:53:08 AM)
rofl.. Aside from the obvious questions already stated about why are you chatting with someone else... etc...I'd have to say that in my experience, this whole process must be a "guy thing' (lol...how's that for generalizing?) I have a friend - the father of my son's friends.. (vanilla) All the boys are involved in the same activities at school so we are at a lot of functions - no avoiding it. Besides, we are friends and pick up the slack for each other (I give his family rides home, he does the same for me) He does this all the time - making side comments about my Master (my "boyfriend" to him). I just laugh and tell him to mind his own business. When he doesn't stop, I tell him to not disrespect his elders (both my Master and me are older than he is). In short, the bottom line is how you approach what is told to you. There is absolutely no reason for you to feel you need to defend your Master. Next time you get the "red flag" conversation and comments, just laugh and say something funny that still points out what that dominant is doing. (My line would be "yea.. you call it a red flag cause you only wish...") And then, change the subject or stop talking. The next time, before the conversation even begins, state your boundaries very clearly - we can talk right up till you want to insult my Master or our relationship. And don't sweat the small stuff. However, since this person is a dominant, I'd make sure your dominant is aware of what's being said - but then, I'm a great believer in never creating situations where my Master could be hit broadside by a comment that he's unaware of. Or you could just stop talking to that person entirely. juliet

KatyLied -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 6:55:31 AM)
quote: Or you could just stop talking to that person entirely. That would be too easy.

laurell3 -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 7:06:02 AM)
Let me point out the obvious.....this guy is wrong for criticising your dom...so you come here and criticise him to the public? How does that logic make sense?

Celeste43 -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 7:42:55 AM)
He's trying to put a wedge between you so he can get you for himself. Tell him now this impolite behavior must stop because it is ruining your friendship. If it doesn't, then we must conclude he isn't interested in being friends, but just in getting into your pants. Personally I'm not allowed to talk privately with other doms, because it is so rare that they are interested in pure friendship. Forum flirtations and nonsexual emails are permitted. Once they cross the line, I don't talk to them again.

LATEXBABY64 -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 7:44:19 AM)
people use these boards as a way to vent to do self thinking. god get beyond the box people. I know why she posted We take tihngs in this two d type relm to much to heart.

grlneedstolearn -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 9:21:38 AM)
Wow, didn't think i'd get so much negativity from this post. We have stopped talking, and my current Dom wants me to go out with friends. What am i supposed to do? Just stay at home while my friends work during the day, then i go to my night shift and work all night? i have a very trusting and open communication with my Dom and he trusts me to make the right decisions. Posting on these threads and just wanting to get something out in the open just because one person feels like it is apprantely not the way to go. People have questions, people have vents. i'm actually talking to other Doms on here and we have a great relationship, friendship wise, and they have never pushed or criticized or anything else. This one person only knows that i do have someone at the moment but that is all. Everything else we talk about is purely vanilla and about .5% bdsm. Oh well, this is gonna get more negativity if i write anymore.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 9:22:48 AM)
The same reason they say if you aren't in a relationship that you aren't really a sub or that you don't know what you are doing- they want a reaction from you and they want to shame you so that you feel you need to prove something to them. Once they have that, well then you're in the web. You've shown a major insecurity point which they can easily exploit and you're willing to spend time talking about it so they get to know you more AND keep you on the line vs other doms.

camille65 -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 9:25:48 AM)
Do you really want to be friends with someone that makes you feel like he is undermining what you and your dom have? Just cuz you want to be friends doesn't mean you should be friends with this guy.

grlneedstolearn -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 9:29:47 AM)
Nope, which is why i don't talk to him

KatyLied -> RE: Doms speaking bad about others (10/27/2007 9:29:50 AM)
I think you need to learn some discernment. Not everyone proclaiming to be your friend is. Why are you allowing a stranger to have this sort of impact on your relationship?

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