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RE: Relocation Factor - 11/17/2007 12:29:41 PM

missturbation

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My only advice would be that going from ldr to live in has to be a big transition to make. Its ok spending a weekend with someone but 24/7 is hugely different. Be sure you are compatible to make the transition, or as sure as you can be.
For me personally i can't relocate and more importantly don't want to. My business is where i live and i can't / won't give that up.

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RE: Relocation Factor - 11/17/2007 12:50:29 PM

eyesopened

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In the past i've talked to guys who asked about relocation right off the bat. Some of them were obviously looking for a meal-ticket, they said if we got along they would move into my place while looking for work....... This was before even meeting in person... eh, next!

But i have always been open to relocation if the relationship required it. my Master just got a promotion in a field that isn't easily portable. i can find meaningful employment just about anywhere. He doesn't live in some miserable or boring city and air fare back to see my family isn't going to break the bank so it just makes sense for me to relocation to Him. But we didn't discuss relocation until we had spent time together, and we met in person within a month of meeting online. Yes, spending 4-5 days at a time together is different than living together but it's really obvious that we have the same tastes, want the home kept tidy, and most importantly, put the toilet paper roll on the same way!

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RE: Relocation Factor - 11/17/2007 1:07:04 PM

Celeste43

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We made a commitment to stay LDR rather than cause either one of us major distress. As it happened, he got a job transfer two years later up to my neck of the woods. If he hadn't, then we would have stayed LDR until my youngest was into college at which point I would have moved.

If however, you don't have it in you to just see each other once a month, or whenever, then don't get involved with someone from that far away. I will say that if it's just seeing parents and siblings, you can talk to them a lot, email, cam and chat for a lot less than flying back and forth all the time.

But LDR is tough, so better to know upfront that you can't see relocating rather than get into a relationship and breaking both your hearts.

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RE: Relocation Factor - 11/17/2007 6:21:42 PM

angelslave77

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Sir and I are in different states and from the outset I have told him that it is damn near impossible for me to relocate because I have children and custody laws mean that I require my ex's permission to leave town with the kids. We disucussed and thought this through at the begining of our relationship too because for me personally I refused to get involved in a LTR that had no chance of developing further, to me that seems pointless and expensive. Sir has decided to come to me and hopefully down the track the laws may change allowing us to move back to where he is from but we did what you are doing OP and thought about it hypothetically right from the start.

But OP what I would suggest is meet you Sir and do it soon, some people are very different in person and you will either feel more motivated to be together or realise it is not meant to be.

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RE: Relocation Factor - 11/17/2007 6:54:42 PM

kyraofMists

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He and I chatted and talked on the phone for 6 months before I went to visit; it has been three years now.

The decision that I will move was made by him and that is the one that makes the most sense. Move one person to his house or move 6 people here and not to mention the financial impacts of a higher cost of living, lost wages, pension, seniority. Moving me in with them is the most practical solution.

As far as transition, I will have to let you know how that goes next spring.

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RE: Relocation Factor - 11/17/2007 8:51:31 PM

TemptingNviceSub

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Relocation, such a difficult thing to decide.For the most part we all have made our niches in our particluar areas..then there is the internet..you meet someone whom you may have so much in common...and of course they live in another state..I think the 20year olds would have an easier time of relocation as well as those moving into their mid-late 60's reasons being obvious..but those from say 30-65..have obligations,ties,family,jobs to hold them into a certain place.So then you figure out who is more able to relocate...somewhere, someone will have to chance it and sacrifice..but who?..how can you decide or negate one or anothers ties?Do you negate the elderly parents? Do you negate the UM's? Do you negate a business owned? Do you negate a love of a particular home purchased?what can be more easily sacrificed for your happiness? or even your possible misjudgement down the line?...I guess it simply comes down to communication,compromise,and faith......with a big emphasis on faith.....Tempting

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Post #: 26