Sound off (Full Version)

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katmaninva -> Sound off (9/22/2007 6:06:22 AM)

I know this is going to generate a lot of thoughts and what not, so PLEASE don't PM me with your response.  I have tried many Dommes seeking submales off of Collarme.com and have had only 2 or 3 three decent answers.  A couple of Dommes are looking for money for their services, not listing themselves as Professional Dommes.  Many don't even both to answer notes sent to them.  Frankly, I think a good number of them are fakes, saying that they are into the scene/bdsm but really aren't.  This is purely my observation and thought.  Maybe they are into it but some courtesy shown those who make an interest it them should be shown back.  Yeah, I know there are a lot of idiots out there, but I'm not one.  With me, it is what you see is what you get.  I'm really getting of the fakes that are on here.  Thanks for letting me rant!



CelticPrince -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:09:55 AM)

kat,
well a rant it was indeed. Getting a match is sometimes difficult and might take years so patience is the key.

PM



chiaThePet -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:11:56 AM)

Yes, you're entitled to rant.

Now about that what you see is what you get thing.

chia* (the pet)



chellekitty -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:13:50 AM)

there are plenty of real people on here...there are plenty of good people on here...there are plenty of "right" people on here...i just haven't found the right person for me yet...i'm not giving up yet...and look how long i've been here...don't give up either...stick around on the message boards, makes the time pass faster....heck, i loose entire days at a time on here now  [:D]



Bobkgin -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:14:53 AM)

A little charity might be in order:

1. I suspect most women get a -lot- of mail.
2. I suspect keeping up with the responses would be pretty much a full time task at 56k (yes, some of us are stuck in the stone age).
3. Courtesy is a virtue, but its absence does not make one a fake.

Hang in. Hang tough. Never give up on your dream.

And think about how much the woman who accepts you will deserve your adoration above all those who passed you by. [;)]



Bobkgin -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:16:33 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

Now about that what you see is what you get thing.

chia* (the pet)


{looks at avatar}

roflmao

[:D]



TNstepsout -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:23:20 AM)

Katman-I can understand your frustration, however ranting on the boards probably won't help. There are a number of threads on the Ask a Mistress board that you might find helpful. There are suggestions on how to make your profile more appealing and how to go about your first contact in a way that is likely to gain the most interest.

You should also consider getting involved in your local scene.



Bobkgin -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:30:13 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TNstepsout

... however ranting on the boards probably won't help.


I wouldn't say that.

He's just announced himself to every domme who reads this that he is real and available and seeking.

Can't hurt [;)]



KatyLied -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:35:44 AM)

quote:

Yeah, I know there are a lot of idiots out there, but I'm not one.  With me, it is what you see is what you get.  I'm really getting of the fakes that are on here. 


Protesting this loudly will make many think that you are the idiots/flakes you profess not to be.



chiaThePet -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:45:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bobkgin

quote:

ORIGINAL: chiaThePet

Now about that what you see is what you get thing.

chia* (the pet)


{looks at avatar}

roflmao

[:D]


Not trying to be mean here ya know, but combing the hair and a smile
wouldn't hurt. And one needs to be aware of the background when
snapping those pics, he's got a clock sticking out of one side of his
head, and something else sticking out of his neck. i immediately
began humming, " i'm a little teapot short and stout. "

chia* (the pet)



Driver1961 -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 6:50:08 AM)

He dips His lid:

I'm definitely with TNstepsout on this One. You may be 'known' outside the boards here but this is your first time posting. (Welcome by the way!)   Bobkin has His views and we can all differ.   I think actions speak loudly either badly or fortuitously. A rant by a newbie does n't speak well to me and I do appreciate you have chosen your words carefully before starting the thread. 

You can gain knowledge here on the boards, heaps of it.  By critically examining the posts you read you will receive the correct education that a Mistress may admire, and feel empowered along the way.

Going out REAL-TIME to a munch (there are plenty of threads here- do a search top right) is the most positive step you can take.  You meet people that put their money where their mouths are and will network extraordinarily quicker than online.

Lastly- announcing yourself so publicly to me shows a lack of strength.  A lack of strength that I would certainly not be interested in if I was looking. Mind you though- your observations of fakes is on the mark and you will see pple on the boards similar.

In short- you are not standing on a street corner here pleading for a job.  You are instead standing on a street corner proffering your services  with questionable dignity.  That's my view and I may well be wrong and others can disagree with me.

Regardless, welcome to the boards, I look forward to further participation from you and wish you the sincerest sucess in your endeavours.

Warm regards Driver.



OnyxGoddess -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 7:02:00 AM)

I see you've experienced the same pain many of us have and I had to chuckle...WELCOME TO COLLARME!
Seriously tho, it's the internet where anyone can claim to be anything and feel no qualms about being a fraud...after all, you're just talking to a bunch of lights on the screen and sometimes a cute/funny pic.  My nickle for what it's worth.



UR2Badored -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 7:40:51 AM)

FR~
quote:

ORIGINAL: katmaninva

I know this is going to generate a lot of thoughts and what not, so PLEASE don't PM me with your response.
 
You are correct.  We generally have two people posting this exact point, if not more, on a weekly basis.  You can do a search on this topic and see just how many people has this very same thought.  This is not an original rant and neither are my responses to the rant.

quote:

ORIGINAL: katmaninva
I have tried many Dommes seeking submales off of Collarme.com and have had only 2 or 3 three decent answers.  A couple of Dommes are looking for money for their services, not listing themselves as Professional Dommes.  Many don't even both to answer notes sent to them. 
 
People on here will not always have a profile you agree with.....just think of it as amusement.  As a rule on here, trust your instincts and not fonts on a screen. Not everyone agrees with the concept that a random email from a stranger is owed full disclosure, respect, or a reply.  There is nothing to do to convince people what their right way is.

quote:

ORIGINAL: katmaninva
Frankly, I think a good number of them are fakes, saying that they are into the scene/bdsm but really aren't.  This is purely my observation and thought. 

I have been lucky in this regard. I find most people on here genuine with their desires, but that does not mean we all are compatible. 
Not everyone who is not interested in you or replying to you are fakes or a mofo.
Please be patient.

quote:

ORIGINAL: katmaninva
Maybe they are into it but some courtesy shown those who make an interest it them should be shown back. 
 
For some, no answer is an answer.  Perhaps the people you are contacting are getting considerable amount of mail or have their own view what's appropriate in responding or not responding to emails. Perhaps they are not happy with the way you have approached them or a multitude of other reasons, I cannot begin to explain or understand.  Carry on.......cie la vie!
quote:

ORIGINAL: katmaninva
Yeah, I know there are a lot of idiots out there, but I'm not one.
 
What we think about ourselves is not always clear to others.
Again, be patient with people who are not gifted with mental telepathy. If you think of a no reply as a response in itself such as a disrespectful person or such....It is alot less a waste of your time.

quote:


With me, it is what you see is what you get.  I'm really getting of the fakes that are on here.  Thanks for letting me rant!

If you are weeding out the fakes (whatever that means to you).  What is the problem?   



mmb1 -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 7:43:44 AM)

lmao at chiaThePet as usual..................



RRafe -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 7:46:12 AM)

I agree, everyone here is a fake.

maybe you need to get off the computer and seek reality?



mmb1 -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 7:48:31 AM)

lol..........boy this is too funny, I am still laughing at chiaThePet, and now you .



homedespot -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 7:50:21 AM)

I get a lot of mail...sometimes as many as 25 a day. I try very hard to respond to all of them --except the most hardcore stupid ones (you f'in bitch) or the "hi's". But even a response doesn't mean I am interested in you. you have the right to write...and we have the right not be interested. I'm not saying you aren't a genuine, sincere person...but perhaps you like butter pecan ice cream and I prefer mochi. The number of times that I have been told that I am a "fake" because I wasn't interested in someone is fairly high. In addition *for Me* it can weeks of talking via email before I decide I'm interested in even giving you a normal email address. (That is both for saftey reasons and also to push the boundries of how *I* determine sincerity).

I do wish you well in your search and hope that you find someone you can click with. And I do think that your picture could be made somewhat nicer. Tilt your chin down and try not to look so angry.

J.

quote:

ORIGINAL: katmaninva

I know this is going to generate a lot of thoughts and what not, so PLEASE don't PM me with your response.  I have tried many Dommes seeking submales off of Collarme.com and have had only 2 or 3 three decent answers.  A couple of Dommes are looking for money for their services, not listing themselves as Professional Dommes.  Many don't even both to answer notes sent to them.  Frankly, I think a good number of them are fakes, saying that they are into the scene/bdsm but really aren't.  This is purely my observation and thought.  Maybe they are into it but some courtesy shown those who make an interest it them should be shown back.  Yeah, I know there are a lot of idiots out there, but I'm not one.  With me, it is what you see is what you get.  I'm really getting of the fakes that are on here.  Thanks for letting me rant!



SirCache -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 8:08:28 AM)

For what it matters, I do think if it's someone who charges for their services, they should at least have the decency to state as much in their opening profile.  As for not answering, don't take it personally.  In my experience, women get huge amounts of mail on a daily basis and I'm not going to fault someone who simply doesn't reply.  Either they were overwhelmed, didn't like what they saw, or had some other reason they did not mail back.  (Heck, I had a sub write back about 2 months after I had written her--she always intended to write back but kept forgetting as the mail piled up.)

I get mail intermittently--so its easy for me to respond and I am happy to do so.  If I had 20 messages a day that effort would likely cease rather quickly.  It also might help when you mail someone to have something that grabs their interests, asks questions, give them the idea that you are interested in them as a person rather than as a Domme no different from any other one on the site.



xoxi -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 8:09:16 AM)

Just an observation, not intended as an insult, but I saw this in your journal:

quote:

Fursuits!!!!!  I have several fursuits and want to tied up in one so bad.   I have wondered what it would be like and want to make it happen so badly it hurts.


Not that there's anything wrong with being a Furry but it is definitely a niche fetish, and might limit your pool of prospective partners.  I'm not saying to change it, because its who you are and what you seek, but like everything else when you are into something more obscure it is harder to find a compatible partner.

I wish you the best of luck :) You do seem like a real, genuine, and nice person.  Someday your Queen will come [;)]



Pyrrsefanie -> RE: Sound off (9/22/2007 8:26:13 AM)

I know your frustration.  It took me years to find my Master.  I thought I had found a good one a few times in the past but no dice... and some were downright mean to me when I politely indicated that I was interested.

I've learned many things from BDSM but if there's one major thing I've learned... it's that patience is key in your search to find the right person.  It's like trying to find a spouse, it won't happen overnight, at least not for the RIGHT one.

Have you read their profiles all the way through?  Some have a particular way in which they want to be addressed, or some are listed as "dominant females" but also as not looking for subs.  I know I get irked when people message me for play even though I clearly state in my profile that I'm spoken for.  And how are you messaging them?  There's a whole thread on here about the one-liner messages.  Take time to introduce yourself a little in the letter, talk about your experiences, what you're looking for, that kind of thing. 

There ARE fakes out there, but they're everywhere, not just here.  Some of them are just annoying, others can actually be harmful, so please be careful no matter where you are.





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