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ORIGINAL: chellekitty

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ORIGINAL: Cyntilating
I ask because.... > it took me years to feel that "soft cushy cloud floaty type "subspace" that most talked about.......the place I went (right off the bat )> was a very dark and primal, almost animalistic place...
thankfully I was with someone who could handle this and knew how to keep me ( and himself ) safe from physically hurting myself & would only let me stay a short time.....even then> I would come out shaking and feeling very vulnerable..sometimes afraid....feeling dark myself..
even tho' > there was something about it that was thrilling and euphoric in its own way...and compelled me to want deeper.....
 
and I don't think I was anywhere near " my limit or farthest edges" .....
so...my question comes from feeling all that...and wondering...
going deeper? what is there?

i was discussing this topic with a female Dominant friend of mine just a little while ago and this came up...she described her scene dynamics with her girl as very primal and i was like...yes thats what i want....but on major major steroids...times a thousand...is the best way i can describe it...and i don't think that a couple of hours of after care would be satisfactory...not even sure if a couple of days would work...i would probably have to have a couple of weeks...and the scene i am imagining, though i have no actual concept, would last much longer than the average scene...

just my thoughts for now...

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ORIGINAL: Kelika

I haven't asked for that type of scene yet, but I have asked to take me further than what I want to go.  The thing is, I would only do it with someone I trust completely.  I actually have exchanged emails with Fifth Angel who wrote Your Pain, My Pleasure about a possible scene; but not to that extreme.  For me, I don't know I would want it from someone I loved so much as someone that was incredibly experienced in both BDSM, martial arts as well as a nurse or paramedic or something.  They tend to be able to watch someone's vital's and can stop it, but yet take right to that point from what I have seen.

Happy hunting...and be careful for what you wish for

Kelika

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ORIGINAL: BoiJen

FA is a GREAT guy btw. I got to meet him at an event in NC that he was presenting and playing at.

I see a lot of posts from D-type here about "I would if they really wanted to..."

I thought you guys were supposed to be in charge?

Not to change the subject.

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I ask for it all the time and get told "nope I don't feel like it" which translates to..."when you least expect it"...it's about enduring and the risk...it wouldn't be what it is If it weren't for the risk that has been posted about. That same risk people don't want to take...it's "edge" for a reason I guess. Then again I do dumb shit like say "I dare ya to try and break my limits...it's not possible" and get the shit kicked out of me anyways.

hey I never said I was smart

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ORIGINAL: Cintilating

To anyone who answered " yes" to this post...or has experience doing this...
 
( real question..not being sarcastic FYI )
 
how do you know what you will "find" when you go that deep into someone?
emotionally, mentally...
they(sub/maso/bottom/etc) may ask for it, having not even thought about the same question..
  

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ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant

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ORIGINAL: Kelika

I haven't asked for that type of scene yet, but I have asked to take me further than what I want to go.  The thing is, I would only do it with someone I trust completely.  I actually have exchanged emails with Fifth Angel who wrote Your Pain, My Pleasure about a possible scene; but not to that extreme.  For me, I don't know I would want it from someone I loved so much as someone that was incredibly experienced in both BDSM, martial arts as well as a nurse or paramedic or something.  They tend to be able to watch someone's vital's and can stop it, but yet take right to that point from what I have seen.

Happy hunting...and be careful for what you wish for

Kelika

Ahhhhhhhhh...and therin lies a paradox.  You say that you could only do this type of scene with someone you trusted in an incredibly deep fashion...yet say you would not do it with someone you love.  What does that say to the Master/Mistress you love so very much?  That you really, really, really love them and really, really, really trust them but...NOT to take you to this place spoken of.  You want to do that with someone you really, really, really trust but not love.  Who then will take care of you after the scene?  Those you did not want to have do it?  They get to "clean up" after the one you trusted enough to take you to this state has moved on because...after all...you are not His/Hers to deal with?

But...someone also spoke of the danger of it poisoning the relationship once those really deep demons are brought out.  So...given the danger of those demons, a good reason to seek someone you do not love to do this...but then that takes us back to the paragraph posted above, does it not?

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ORIGINAL: TotalState

Nope.  Hard limit.

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ORIGINAL: Kelika

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ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant

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ORIGINAL: Kelika

I haven't asked for that type of scene yet, but I have asked to take me further than what I want to go.  The thing is, I would only do it with someone I trust completely.  I actually have exchanged emails with Fifth Angel who wrote Your Pain, My Pleasure about a possible scene; but not to that extreme.  For me, I don't know I would want it from someone I loved so much as someone that was incredibly experienced in both BDSM, martial arts as well as a nurse or paramedic or something.  They tend to be able to watch someone's vital's and can stop it, but yet take right to that point from what I have seen.

Happy hunting...and be careful for what you wish for

Kelika

Ahhhhhhhhh...and therin lies a paradox.  You say that you could only do this type of scene with someone you trusted in an incredibly deep fashion...yet say you would not do it with someone you love.  What does that say to the Master/Mistress you love so very much?  That you really, really, really love them and really, really, really trust them but...NOT to take you to this place spoken of.  You want to do that with someone you really, really, really trust but not love.  Who then will take care of you after the scene?  Those you did not want to have do it?  They get to "clean up" after the one you trusted enough to take you to this state has moved on because...after all...you are not His/Hers to deal with?

But...someone also spoke of the danger of it poisoning the relationship once those really deep demons are brought out.  So...given the danger of those demons, a good reason to seek someone you do not love to do this...but then that takes us back to the paragraph posted above, does it not?

I realize it is a paradox in many ways.  The reason why I would want a scene that intense with someone I don't love is because if a landmind is found...if it takes me beyond what I can handle emotionally, I don't want to end up hating the person I love.  Plus, ultimately, I'm not in a relationship with someone and I don't know when I will be in a relationship with someone. 

I don't get pleasure from the pain, I am not a pain slut, nor do I even get excited physically (in the obvious way) from bottoming save for one person who is a great teacher in the community at large.  What I get from it typically is the servitude part of it.  Now, I do have a need to push myself so I demo a fair amount.  At some point I would like to explore it on a deeper level though.  That is part of the reason why I think it could be good with someone I don't love, but trust and respect.  Plus, FA has put people through a spiritual journey many times before.  I would like to get to that place.

Eventually, if all things worked out with the scene, and it would make my dominant happy to do it to me as well, I would probably be okay with it.  Hell, there isn't much I wouldn't try once...lol.  I've even been stapled with a power stapler for a demo at SINSations; I was the demo doll ;) .

Well wishes,
Kelika

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ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

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ORIGINAL: Grlwithboy

No.  Make me cry, make me genuinely afraid, make me confused, make me pissed off, make me remember - sure. But I don't have confidence in my skills to land RIGHT on the margin and I'm not willing to go over it and literally have someone need to be hospitalized because I wanted to get to the margin.

This is my general opinion. I am way too inexperienced to even contemplate something like that.

(And "Screw the Roses, Give Me the Thorns" told me not to....so there you go )

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ORIGINAL: Perplex
You have found a sub who really wants to be broken (define in any of the ways it can be, but at the end of the session they want to be near hospitalization (physically, mentally, emotionally). They have made it clear to your satisfaction they are both sane and understanding what it is they are asking you to do.

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ORIGINAL: rmanrr

Greetings
Well, I am about to find out about My limits this weekend coming up as I travel to meet My woman for the second time. I will most likely push some of Mine being newly opened to My darker sadistic side by her, but as she wants it and I am beginning to also enjoy giving pain...we shall see how far it goes. First meeting went better than all possible expectations...I am guessing this one will too....but perhaps not....  I see no reason for it not to go well. I will report back on monday night or perhaps tuesday...heh heh.

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ORIGINAL: Kelika

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ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant

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ORIGINAL: Kelika

I haven't asked for that type of scene yet, but I have asked to take me further than what I want to go.  The thing is, I would only do it with someone I trust completely.  I actually have exchanged emails with Fifth Angel who wrote Your Pain, My Pleasure about a possible scene; but not to that extreme.  For me, I don't know I would want it from someone I loved so much as someone that was incredibly experienced in both BDSM, martial arts as well as a nurse or paramedic or something.  They tend to be able to watch someone's vital's and can stop it, but yet take right to that point from what I have seen.

Happy hunting...and be careful for what you wish for

Kelika

Ahhhhhhhhh...and therin lies a paradox.  You say that you could only do this type of scene with someone you trusted in an incredibly deep fashion...yet say you would not do it with someone you love.  What does that say to the Master/Mistress you love so very much?  That you really, really, really love them and really, really, really trust them but...NOT to take you to this place spoken of.  You want to do that with someone you really, really, really trust but not love.  Who then will take care of you after the scene?  Those you did not want to have do it?  They get to "clean up" after the one you trusted enough to take you to this state has moved on because...after all...you are not His/Hers to deal with?

But...someone also spoke of the danger of it poisoning the relationship once those really deep demons are brought out.  So...given the danger of those demons, a good reason to seek someone you do not love to do this...but then that takes us back to the paragraph posted above, does it not?

I realize it is a paradox in many ways.  The reason why I would want a scene that intense with someone I don't love is because if a landmind is found...if it takes me beyond what I can handle emotionally, I don't want to end up hating the person I love.  Plus, ultimately, I'm not in a relationship with someone and I don't know when I will be in a relationship with someone. 

Will you then be left to do aftercare on yourself?  If you are involved with someone whom you love and trust but don't want doing this scene, do they get to handle the pain and hostility from this landmine discovered during the course of someone else having fun with you?  Or will you rely on the one taking you on this fantastic journey to now follow through with the aftercare needed to deal with this landmine?  These are questions you have not answered yet. 

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I don't get pleasure from the pain, I am not a pain slut, nor do I even get excited physically (in the obvious way) from bottoming save for one person who is a great teacher in the community at large.  What I get from it typically is the servitude part of it.  Now, I do have a need to push myself so I demo a fair amount.  At some point I would like to explore it on a deeper level though.  That is part of the reason why I think it could be good with someone I don't love, but trust and respect.  Plus, FA has put people through a spiritual journey many times before.  I would like to get to that place.

  I understand the curiosity about being taken on a wondrous journey through carefully applied BDSM and D/s techniques during a scene...I have watched it done here...but if this journey uncovers these emotional demons, what then?  You seem to be looking at this from only the mental and emotional aspects...what about the physical aspects?  And again, I wonder...if you do become involved with someone that you love and trust but choose not to do this journey with, how do you approach them with this?  How do you go through what I asked above with them and make it sound appealing to them when what it seems like...looked at in cold, harsh reality...is that you want to go on this fantastic, spiritual journey that MAY uncover deep emotional demons at the hands of another BUT you want your loved one to pick up the pieces because the guide will not be around to do so?

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Eventually, if all things worked out with the scene, and it would make my dominant happy to do it to me as well, I would probably be okay with it.  Hell, there isn't much I wouldn't try once...lol.  I've even been stapled with a power stapler for a demo at SINSations; I was the demo doll ;) .

Well wishes,
Kelika