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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 11:45:13 PM   
Aimtoplease101


Posts: 319
Joined: 2/8/2006
From: San Diego, California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSimone

Why is it on CM when you politely tell someone you do not believe you are compatible or interested ,you suddenly become a bitch? Do male dominants get the same response? are they A(**holes is they refuse a potential submissive?

I am very honest about my interests, what I am seeking and my profession. I do not mislead people when they approach me. So why is that a bad thing??



I don't think this is unique to CM, or to the D/s community. Luckily, it's also not a universal trait. While no one likes rejection, some can handle it better than others. I remember in my younger bar cruising days, if a guy got "shot down" approaching a lady, many would react with the comment that she was either a bitch or a lesbian. I think it was just ego preservation from those with fragile egos. If you're getting those types of comments here, I think you're making contact with the insecure and immature crowd somehow. Just ignore them and concentrate on the better candidates. I've always thought that, to make it as a sub, you couldn't have too fragile an ego-- you'd be destroyed!

Good luck-- and don't get too jaded.

ATP

_____________________________

Pleasing you pleases me.

(in reply to MsSimone)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 11:51:08 PM   
OedipusRexIt


Posts: 634
Joined: 11/15/2005
Status: offline 		I can honestly say that I have never had anyone here, or elsewhere, give back a passive-aggressive response to a kind letdown.

IMO, one sad fact is that a function of many male egos, and one not so hard-wired into females, is the fear of rejection, along with the knee-jerk sour grapes response.

A lot of guys find their penis literally shrinks every time a woman says "no".  Many fail to realize that calling you a bitch doesn't make it grow back...

You could either learn to ignore imbeciles, or else practice your "It's not you, it's me" speech.


_____________________________

"My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die..."

(in reply to Aimtoplease101)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 4:31:48 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		DS4Dummies. Lamborghinis arent squirrely.

(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 4:34:18 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Men get over rejections. A woman will let you know about it the rest of her life.

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 8:56:05 AM   
spankmepink11


Posts: 1310
Joined: 9/28/2005
Status: offline 		I'm just glad the people like that have been the minority in my experience....

Rejection is never easy whether you're on the giving or receiving end.....

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 10:49:34 AM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline 		Some people just have fragile egos and are sore losers. I personally get a chuckle when someone gets their undies in a twist after I've told them that I'm not interested, because that removes any sense of guilt or empathy I might have had for rejecting them. :)

_____________________________

I still hear you scream... in every breath, every single motion

(in reply to MsSimone)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 10:55:25 AM   
DS4DUMMIES


Posts: 180
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

DS4Dummies. Lamborghinis arent squirrely.


.....they might be during a woman's rant.....

DS4

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 11:15:05 AM   
GhitaAmati


Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline 		Ive dated someone before just to get to drive their car.......does that make me shallow?

_____________________________

I said I was a submissive, I never said I was a GOOD submissive.


Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.
~Woody Allen

(in reply to DS4DUMMIES)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 2:07:25 PM   
InsAndOutsFL


Posts: 16
Joined: 8/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

Ive dated someone before just to get to drive their car.......does that make me shallow?


Nope!  That makes you a genius in my eyes...wonder why I never thought of that...

(in reply to GhitaAmati)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 2:27:23 PM   
corsetgirl


Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

Ive dated someone before just to get to drive their car.......does that make me shallow?


Priceless!  I am curious if you liked the car...

(in reply to InsAndOutsFL)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 2:44:10 PM   
GreyGore


Posts: 8
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline 		I definitely prefer a simple "No thanks" to feeling completely ignored... I try to be appreciative when someone takes the time to respond as such and respectful of their wishes. At least know I know why so many fail to respond at all...

Gregory

(in reply to corsetgirl)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 3:37:05 PM   
SeanPony


Posts: 169
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline 		Ah just shrug those dirtdevils off.

Life is too short to drink cheap beer :)

(in reply to GreyGore)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 8:26:51 PM   
MistressDolly


Posts: 917
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSimone

Why is it on CM when you politely tell someone you do not believe you are compatible or interested ,you suddenly become a bitch? Do male dominants get the same response? are they A(**holes is they refuse a potential submissive?

I am very honest about my interests, what I am seeking and my profession. I do not mislead people when they approach me.



So why is that a bad thing??



Meet bitterness with indifference; you can not please everyone.


_____________________________

m i s t r e s s d o l l y . c o m

m y s p a c e


(in reply to MsSimone)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 8:35:12 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: curvyslavegirl

I secretly get happy when I turn someone down and they become instantly evil in their responses. It makes it so much easier to tell that I made the right decision!


my thoughts exactly

_____________________________

...Look into my eyes and I'll own you....



(in reply to curvyslavegirl)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 8:39:53 PM   
DrkJourney


Posts: 1917
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSimone

Why is it on CM when you politely tell someone you do not believe you are compatible or interested ,you suddenly become a bitch? Do male dominants get the same response? are they A(**holes is they refuse a potential submissive?

I am very honest about my interests, what I am seeking and my profession. I do not mislead people when they approach me. So why is that a bad thing??



While I have never been treated like an asshole for turning somebody down, there have been a few times where it was not a pretty sight.   Here's a few cum back lines or types of things said upon rejection...
  • But I give killer blow jobs, too bad you won't know now.
  • But I'm really good at <insert boastful remark>.
  • Alright, but you don't know what you're missing.


Basically, just a last ditch rub it in what I'm going to missing thing. 




yeah I get those too, and the added:    you just turned down a rich one....you blew it

um...yeah...that's what I'm looking for (eye roll)

_____________________________

...Look into my eyes and I'll own you....



(in reply to WhiplashSmile)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 8:45:23 PM   
DarkDesirestx


Posts: 7
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		I usually just thank them for their interest and say I hope they find the one they seek soon.  I find this seems to be effective in not hurting their feelings. I don't like hurting anyone's feelings. I know that rejection is just a part of life and not everyone will be perfect for all out there. I actually find that when I've written to someone first and they don't reply, that for me I can accept that. It doesn't bother me in the least to never hear a reply. I think I actually prefer that to a letter saying ' Hey, I don't like you.' LOL oh well to each their own.

< Message edited by DarkDesirestx -- 8/21/2007 9:23:06 PM >

(in reply to MsSimone)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 8:56:26 PM   
corsetgirl


Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline 		I have also been blown off because of my being a BBW but I think everyone has certain tastes on what attracts people.  I try to tell them good luck in their search and this gives me time to look for a dom who would understand and cherish me.

I have also rejected one "dom" that I never met on a first date who was so anxious on "training me" wanted to have sex with me.  I remember him being on this site, complaining that there were no "real slaves"...hmmmm...coincidence?  I think not. 

(in reply to DarkDesirestx)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 9:15:03 PM   
SireKane


Posts: 105
Joined: 1/22/2004
Status: offline 		Personally, I've never had a submissive female disrespect me because I expressed my disinterest. I have witnessed on many occasions submissive men make disrespectful remarks when rejected by a dominant female.

(in reply to corsetgirl)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 9:21:18 PM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		were not worthy were not worthy  lol  it is all what ya make it

(in reply to SireKane)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Rejection???? - 8/21/2007 9:24:46 PM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSimone

Why is it on CM when you politely tell someone you do not believe you are compatible or interested ,you suddenly become a bitch? Do male dominants get the same response? are they A(**holes is they refuse a potential submissive?

I am very honest about my interests, what I am seeking and my profession. I do not mislead people when they approach me. So why is that a bad thing??



some Dommes out there can't except rejection either. probably not as many as Doms, but they are out there...trust me. i've turned down a few and got an eyeful from them in my email. that's when the block button comes in handy.


_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to MsSimone)
Profile   Post #: 40
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