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Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 2:40:47 PM   
MsSimone


Posts: 119
Joined: 7/15/2004
From: Chicago,Illinois
Status: offline 		Why is it on CM when you politely tell someone you do not believe you are compatible or interested ,you suddenly become a bitch? Do male dominants get the same response? are they A(**holes is they refuse a potential submissive?

I am very honest about my interests, what I am seeking and my profession. I do not mislead people when they approach me. So why is that a bad thing??


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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 2:47:03 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Because they have to make it your issue, not theirs.

As always, don't expect anyone to share the same values as you, and be happily surprised when they do.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 2:47:18 PM   
satyrsnymph28


Posts: 379
Status: offline 		posted a thread identical to this myself just the other day...

no, male doms don't get the same response...

its some sort of scientific thing... men don't handle rejection well... they name call and such to make themselves feel better about themselves...

most of them do it

know that it truly is them... and not you...

at least if its as simplistic as you describe...

and don't take it to heart.
just move on...



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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 2:55:07 PM   
Solaise


Posts: 64
Joined: 11/29/2004
Status: offline 		This is caused by an involuntary reflex of a hyperactive ego-receptor nerve that runs straight from the penis to the brain. Not all men have this trait.

(in reply to satyrsnymph28)
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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 2:57:01 PM   
curvyslavegirl


Posts: 134
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I secretly get happy when I turn someone down and they become instantly evil in their responses. It makes it so much easier to tell that I made the right decision!

(in reply to Solaise)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 2:58:51 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		I dunno about male doms getting it from subs but I know fem subs get it from male doms.

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 3:01:34 PM   
satyrsnymph28


Posts: 379
Status: offline 		yeah... precisely...

it sucks...

i know...

i totally ready myself for it every time i talk to a new male... Dom males do it too...

its a good potion of anyone with a penis...

women cry and get all sensitive when we get turned down (well, some of us)
men name call and try to make others feel bad...

its science

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Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 3:04:26 PM   
nmjardine


Posts: 116
Joined: 7/31/2005
Status: offline 		Perhaps you should employ the technique I get from male doms--if you find you aren't compatible, simply cease all correspondence. There's absolutely no way one is going to be able to make everyone happy in rejection. Why do people have to take it personally?

(in reply to AquaticSub)
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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 3:11:52 PM   
CopperGriffin


Posts: 1
Joined: 2/6/2004
Status: offline 		This is an amazing question. But the true answer is if the guy or girl is being evil after you tell them what you do not want. They are not worth it.

Joseph

(in reply to nmjardine)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 3:27:20 PM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline 		you know, i've both slammed and given informative (if often condescending) posts to  a number of people who complain about how difficult it is to find someone to fit scratch the at Domly or subbie need

now i've been thinking carefully about my own life

i realize that i've never looked for a relationship in the either lifestyle or vanilla world; i've simply never really felt the need for a relationship until i am actually in one, or have lost one... in the case of the latter, i don't jump out and put myself back in the scene; i generally take myself off the market and after time i'll make it clear that i'm available; but never have i actively searched for that counterpart that will fulfill me

when not in a relationship, i have always found it rather easy to find casual companionship to suit my physical needs and desires

i realize in all these things, i am rather lucky; on the other hand, i am so skittish about relationships and committing myself emotionally (i've always found myself committed, devoted, and in love before i have a chance to get out without hurting myself), i realize that i am also pretty stunted and undeveloped in that area of my life... perhaps i am not so lucky after all

so, i wonder how i would react if i went out looking and couldn't find what i wanted... would i continually accept less than what i need just to be with someone and later become embittered when it becomes glaringly obvious that i'm with the wrong person or it ends... or on the other hand, would i stick to my guns until i found what i really wanted/needed, finally becoming cynical of the whole process as i continue to be alone?

food for thought, i guess


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if only to keep me to herself.

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Where the fuck do I post?

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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 3:28:39 PM   
ObedientYYC


Posts: 80
Joined: 8/25/2006
Status: offline 		Others might think this "politically incorrect", but I think this lifestyle often attracts those with self-esteem issues.    So they just take things way too personally.   If you get that kind of reaction, just be glad you didn't get involved ;)

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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 3:51:05 PM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		that  is a good question. to me i never look at anything as rejection. cause even though you might not be compatable you might be friends which are all kinds. I try to keep an open mind. lesson learned is that  everyone we come in comntact with effects us in some way... if a domme or dom does not take us on then the next will.. I also know that how you reject someone is important. not having the same interest or chemestry that is a big one.. one that is easy to understand.. In past i have run across some who have been really good friends..People  i can goto for advice or help.. Iwe even joke about some of the bs in the ds.
   I  have also met dommes who thought that they were goddess on a platform turn out to be really bad apples ..
Have met Doms who apes would be a better discription as red neck as you can lol i call that Hill Billy bdsm
I guess if a submissive is agressive sexualy driven i can see that playing out where they would be hate full

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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 3:57:20 PM   
MissyRane


Posts: 1032
Joined: 5/11/2005
Status: offline 		what was the saying?..and they say bitch as if it is a bad thing?

(in reply to LATEXBABY64)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 3:59:56 PM   
WhiplashSmile


Posts: 1472
Joined: 6/8/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSimone

Why is it on CM when you politely tell someone you do not believe you are compatible or interested ,you suddenly become a bitch? Do male dominants get the same response? are they A(**holes is they refuse a potential submissive?

I am very honest about my interests, what I am seeking and my profession. I do not mislead people when they approach me. So why is that a bad thing??



While I have never been treated like an asshole for turning somebody down, there have been a few times where it was not a pretty sight.   Here's a few cum back lines or types of things said upon rejection...
  • But I give killer blow jobs, too bad you won't know now.
  • But I'm really good at <insert boastful remark>.
  • Alright, but you don't know what you're missing.

Basically, just a last ditch rub it in what I'm going to missing thing. 


(in reply to MsSimone)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 6:05:23 PM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: satyrsnymph28

posted a thread identical to this myself just the other day...

no, male doms don't get the same response...

its some sort of scientific thing... men don't handle rejection well... they name call and such to make themselves feel better about themselves...

most of them do it

know that it truly is them... and not you...

at least if its as simplistic as you describe...

and don't take it to heart.
just move on...




I disagree, most Men I know have come to the realization that not everyone, is for everyone. There are some very nice people out there, that are just not for me. I am actualy, all in all a pretty good guy,. Just because some one doesn't want me, doesn't change that. It just means they seek something different.

Jeff
"If you don't live it, it won't come out your horn"  Charlie Parker

< Message edited by Jeffff -- 8/20/2007 6:07:20 PM >

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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 6:35:43 PM   
trustingsubHF


Posts: 34
Joined: 8/19/2007
From: VA
Status: offline 		people either connect or not... there is no in between! i think that honesty is crucial...

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RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 6:46:25 PM   
satyrsnymph28


Posts: 379
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

I disagree, most Men I know have come to the realization that not everyone, is for everyone. There are some very nice people out there, that are just not for me. I am actualy, all in all a pretty good guy,. Just because some one doesn't want me, doesn't change that. It just means they seek something different.



This makes you a rare one who doesn't behave in this manner... there are some... but most others are too insecure to be accepting of disinterest without name calling and rudeness...

Chances are that "most men i know" would, when put in this situation, would throw out "bitch" or "psycho" if someone showed an honest lack of interest in them. 

I never claimed that every man is that way... but its like a needle in a haystack to find one who won't throw something like that at me in the initial "getting to know you" phase... I can be a bit tough on someone when first getting to know them... at least until they prove why they are of value to my life...

And if they prove not to be, I let them know...








(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 6:50:03 PM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Yup, I think Jeffff is a rare one, but I also think that most men have come to that realization, they just don't want to admit it.  If they thought about it, they'd realize that they are being rejected so much as being told that interests/personalities/whatever simply don't match very well.

(in reply to satyrsnymph28)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 7:03:59 PM   
goodgirl85


Posts: 221
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline 		It depends on how they tell me they aren't interested. If they come out and say, hey I don't think we are compatible then fine. I've even had some who've have said that I will make a great sub for someone someday, or even that it was fun talking to me. But if have been talking for a few weeks when you make this decision, don't send me a text message saying "I've sent you an email slut" then in the that email insult me.

not very nice. and I will call you on it.


girl

(in reply to bandit25)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Rejection???? - 8/20/2007 7:23:40 PM   
DS4DUMMIES


Posts: 180
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		Here are some of the replies I get from the women I turn down ........

".....oh thank God...."

" ....go ahead...settle for Ms. "Golf Ball Through The Garden Hose".....just so you know what you turned down....here I am doing it with a football!..."

"...you'll miss them when they are gone...."

"...well.....just see if I ever let YOU own me........"

".....how many times in your life do you think you'll get a shot at a pre-op like me?....huh????? ....."

"......go ahead youshallow bastard.....have your 5'-8"  130 pound brunette with a 38DD chest and her damned obsession with sucking  and her lousy  PhD in astrophysics, and her squirrely Lamborghini... once you finally regret having chosen her...then where will you be??...huh??? ...I'll be taken!..."

Ds4

quote:

ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsSimone

Why is it on CM when you politely tell someone you do not believe you are compatible or interested ,you suddenly become a bitch? Do male dominants get the same response? are they A(**holes is they refuse a potential submissive?

I am very honest about my interests, what I am seeking and my profession. I do not mislead people when they approach me. So why is that a bad thing??



While I have never been treated like an asshole for turning somebody down, there have been a few times where it was not a pretty sight.   Here's a few cum back lines or types of things said upon rejection...
  • But I give killer blow jobs, too bad you won't know now.
  • But I'm really good at <insert boastful remark>.
  • Alright, but you don't know what you're missing.

Basically, just a last ditch rub it in what I'm going to missing thing. 



(in reply to WhiplashSmile)
Profile   Post #: 20
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