RE: Falling off the edge of love. (Full Version)

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Aswad -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:02:17 PM)

Former depression, domiguy... I'm talking about a past-tense condition here.

/_____  See, that's a big smile, right there... or, rather...
\       It's supposed to go: [:D]



kittinSol -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:02:21 PM)

"Hand in glove
The sun shines out of our behinds
No it's not like any other love
This one is different, because it's us

Hand in glove
We can go wherever we please
And everything depends upon
How near you stand to me

And if the people stare
Let the people stare
Oh, I really don't know
And I really don't care!" (The Smiths)



SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:03:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

I like to come out to these forums to find happiness and be chipper...you guys and your depression is really quite the buzz-kill.


I knew you would come out of that closet eventually. I knew it.

Who's depressed? Some of us are just exhausted and....never mind.




Aswad -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:03:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

What exactly do you mean by that [:-] ?


I mean that, in my adult life, I have not fallen in love.
Certain drugs replicate what I remember about it from my teens, though. [:D]



domiguy -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:11:05 PM)

Girlfriend in an over medicated coma.



kittinSol -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:11:09 PM)

Aswad, I don't know what to say. I don't want to pry, but I think it would affect me deeply, not to be able to feel something I knew I was capable of feeling. Like a hidden treasure. I am sorry.



kittinSol -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:12:11 PM)

I know I'm unlovable. You don't have to tell me. I don't have much in my life. So take it, it's yours. (The Smiths).



domiguy -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:25:42 PM)

When I was in high school my parents went through a horrible divorce....Dad said it was because Mom was a whore....Anywhooo,  I didn't think I would ever find love again.....So I started writing poetry......My poems...

"Hallways filled with love and dead students"

"Black Trenchcoat"

and....

"Burying my love along with the neighbors cat"

All helped me work through one of the darkest episodes of my life....I hope these words have helped someone in need.



SugarMyChurro -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:26:38 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol
Engorgement: that's where love's at.


Anything particular on your mind, kittinSol?

[;)]



Aswad -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 8:36:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

Aswad, I don't know what to say. I don't want to pry, but I think it would affect me deeply, not to be able to feel something I knew I was capable of feeling. Like a hidden treasure. I am sorry.


Don't be.
What most people call love, I call puppy love.
What I call love is more rewarding, to me; YMMV.
When they say it's chemistry, they don't know how right they are, most of the time.
I prefer something a bit deeper than a simple drug high, even if the body makes it.
That said, Parnate raises the baseline levels by 13200%, and allows you to get it from chocolate...



SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 9:04:20 PM)

mmm Chocolate.

Sigh



kittinSol -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 9:08:18 PM)

Love is definitely not about chemistry or getting on with someone. As you say though, enamoration is.

Here is one crucial piece of ErichFrommism, and a very beautiful one at that: "If a person loves only one other person, and is indifferent to all others, his love is not love, but a symbiotic attachment, an enlarged egotism." I don't usually like quoting others in such a deadpan way, because it makes me feel like I am making others' thoughts my property... it's lacking in humility, I think, but I'm sure Fromm wouldn't have minded :-)

Whereas Morrissey probably gets off on anybody quoting him (-:  

Fine threaders, I'm off to love the person I love the most! Be well.





kittinSol -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 9:10:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SugarMyChurro

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol
Engorgement: that's where love's at.


Anything particular on your mind, kittinSol?

[;)]



Sweet, Sugar.



SusanofO -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/30/2007 9:15:08 PM)

I've been taking anti-depressants for over 25 years, and I've fallen in love since I started taking them, so I guess the ones I take don't make me "at risk" for this syndrome (I take Serzone). Fortunately, the don't affect my sex drive, either.

- Susan



Aswad -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/31/2007 4:26:43 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kittinSol

Love is definitely not about chemistry or getting on with someone. As you say though, enamoration is.


Exactly. In my experience, though, some people don't distinguish, and I think that's the main gist of the article. Enamoration / infatuation is flattened by serotonergic drugs and antipsychotics. Love is only flattened by the latter, not the former. But love is also very often flattened or nulled out by the illness itself.

quote:


Whereas Morrissey probably gets off on anybody quoting him (-:  


Indubitably, our dear kittinSol. [:D]



Aswad -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/31/2007 4:37:01 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

I've been taking anti-depressants for over 25 years, and I've fallen in love since I started taking them, so I guess the ones I take don't make me "at risk" for this syndrome (I take Serzone). Fortunately, the don't affect my sex drive, either.


Serzone (nefazodone) is not an SSRI. In fact, it partially blocks one of the main "circuits" that energize the serotonergic system, so it is highly unlikely to have similar effects to the SSRIs, and I want to hug you for reminding me, since I'd forgotten all about it, and have spent weeks looking for a non-neuroleptic 5HT2A-antagonist for a friend who may just avoid permanent inpatient care if this works...

It's rather telling that people have come to treat "antidepressant" and "SSRI" as synonyms.



camille65 -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/31/2007 7:57:29 AM)

I almost wish I hadn't clicked on this thread but it was by kittin and I just hadda look.
The information answers some questions I didn't know I had. Sigh.
Which is worse, to go through life not quite feeling things or to go through life always dancing on the edge of a razor? Yeah that was a wee bit dramatic lol but it is true.

There is simply no way I can manage without a heavy dose of zoloft (150mg) a day. If I drop it even by 25mg then BOOM I'm in trouble.
It is irritating as hell dammit yes I'm ranting now uhhuh but I am tired of it all and really trapped in it.

Clinical depression is not something you can pull yourself up by your bootstraps from.
I despise the weakness of needing them.
I despise the side effects. Can we say no orgasming in years?

Ohjeez I am sorry I went off. I just woke up and this was waiting for me lolol. Now I'm doing the 'ok or cancel this post' debate [&:]



Aswad -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/31/2007 10:07:52 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

Which is worse, to go through life not quite feeling things or to go through life always dancing on the edge of a razor?


Dunno. Tried both. Still undecided. [:D]

Anyway, there are quite a few options that don't dull emotional response.

quote:


There is simply no way I can manage without a heavy dose of zoloft (150mg) a day.


There is probably something that will do the job, but the real question is whether it's worth going back to the drawing board to find a better solution. If you've been on it more than 2 years, I'd tend toward "yes", but your mileage and priorities may vary. What kind of medical coverage/finances do you have? There are some good options out there, really.

quote:

It is irritating as hell dammit yes I'm ranting now uhhuh but I am tired of it all and really trapped in it.


~hug~

You can borrow my heavy bag, if that helps get the frustration out. [sm=boxer.gif]
Broke the chain and got a lengthwise hairline fracture last time.
Dumped a shitload of frustrations into the ether, though.
Which is better than carrying it around, IME.

quote:


Clinical depression is not something you can pull yourself up by your bootstraps from.


~nod~

Though, admittedly, depending on severity, there may be things one can influence along the way.

quote:


I despise the weakness of needing them.


I can relate. Takes a bit of time to realize you're human. And that this includes your mind.

quote:


I despise the side effects. Can we say no orgasming in years?


That particular one is usually the most fixable side-effect.

But, yeah, once the meds start working, the side-effects become more annoying, because they're being viewed against an artificially maintained "normal state", rather than the depressed state. In the latter context, they're usually "oh, well". In the former context, they can range from "grr" to "was it really that bad?". This is where people tend to mess up and stop taking them before the rest of their chemistry has stabilized, and then they get ill again. Kind of like walking on a splinted leg before it's healed.

quote:


Now I'm doing the 'ok or cancel this post' debate [&:]


Can't speak for anyone but myself, but I'd say no worries.



kittinSol -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/31/2007 10:10:27 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aswad

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

Now I'm doing the 'ok or cancel this post' debate [&:]


Can't speak for anyone but myself, but I'd say no worries.



No worries indeed. But... what about love?!



camille65 -> RE: Falling off the edge of love. (7/31/2007 1:00:40 PM)

I love easily, and I love often. My R is loved with more intensity than I've felt for anything/anyone else in the world.
[:)]



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