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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 5:26:52 PM

sierraflowr

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From: Northern California
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Viridana, i also do not find that pain is a turn on if i'm getting beat or something. Yet, sexually i DO like some pain. does that make sense?
the hardest thing i find is to try to explain that to a Dominant. it is just different types of pain and what the main purpose is for i think.
heck if i know lol

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 5:39:40 PM

ready4srvce4all

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quote:

ORIGINAL: earthycouple

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissOchistic

I am terrified of pain. The worst ways to die would be painful ones, and I freak out from stubbing my toes. Static shock is the worst; it makes me nervous to touch cars. Pain = bad.

However, I adore pain that I cause myself. It has a multitude of effects, from calming to turn on, happiness, energy. All good things.

So the idea of trusting someone else to hurt me is definitely not only erotic but romantic to me. And once I've reached that level, I do totally trust, and so I get that same effects that I get from doing it to myself. It's wonderful.

As to why I actually like it, I have no clue. Guess it's just faulty wiring :)

I get somewhat excited just thinking about being able to bring you to the point of trusting me after reading your above quote.....*walks away from boards all giddy*

I want to bring her home for dinner Mistress, can I?

I don't know why I love pain either. I also learned from Mistress that I am sensualist, as I just can't help but feel every type of texture, I like striking similar objects of different material (plastic and metal egg turners for instance) against me, I like the feelings of a certain t-shirt compared to
another, and so on.

I can't say it's all pain I like. I certainly can not stand stubbing a toe, and if I break a fingernail, I'm a serious pussy if I can see a little blood. Mistress biting into me and drawing blood though? Damn, I'm getting excited just thinking of it!

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 7:16:15 PM

Missokyst

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It makes sense to me. I do enjoy pain, but it upsets me if it is coming with disappointment. I do not get off on pain when someone is using it to show me where I have gone wrong. Heck.. I find it painful to be yelled at. No, it is even bad if someone raises their voice to me. I can't handle being considered "not good enough"

And for me discipline for a reason (not play) is devastating.

On the other side though.. I can find some relief in accidental pain. Pain which occurs out of a BDSM realm, like stubbing my toe, or in this case stepping on a hot coal and burning myself. Lately I have considered such accidents may not really be accidents. It is amazing what the sub-conscious mind can do to help you regain the mental balance.
I don't know too many people who can take that non play pain and turn it into healing.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: sierraflowr

Viridana, i also do not find that pain is a turn on if i'm getting beat or something. Yet, sexually i DO like some pain. does that make sense?
the hardest thing i find is to try to explain that to a Dominant. it is just different types of pain and what the main purpose is for i think.
heck if i know lol

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pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 7:24:48 PM

velvetears

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Do you know if you are a masochist? Have you ever examined why? And if you have, can you move beyond the need?
Kyst

i am a masochist because i enjoy pain. i don't process it like the normal person does, it brings me sublime joy and is intoxicatingly delicous and addictive. The sub space i experience as a result lasts for days and makes me feel better then any "pill" i have ever taken to "feel better". Why am i like this? i don't try to figure it out, because in the end it really doesn't matter why - i don't want to fix it nor do i plan on ever trying to. i like being this way. Why in the world would i want to "move beyond the need" ? Move to what?? i am perfectly content residing right where i am

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 10:37:38 PM

sierraflowr

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sjacket

The nature of sadism? Or the sadism of nature?
And another masochist here... In fact, last year when it came time to renew the lic. plates for my car, I put in a request for vanity plates- MASOKST. A week later I got a letter from the STATE OF OHIO saying that my request had been denied as the plates were "inappropriate". How dare they call me "inappropriate"!?! Fuck 'em.

(edited cuz I can't type today)

Thats tooo funny. i saw a vanity plate here in CA that read FtFtish or something like that anyway it was obvious that it meant Foot Fetish. i died laughing. funny thing was i'm prettyyy sure who it was :D

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 11:38:43 PM

CuriousLord

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Reasons girls I've known have been masochists.. cases (fake names):

Alla: She was uncontrolably unaddicted to pain. Emotional, physical, etc. She used to cum from just being punched. At the same time, she hated that she enjoyed it. Which she loved hating, then, in turn, hated loving. Very confused individual. I have no idea what's come of her, though she annoyed me too badly to keep around.

Daniella: Loved pain. It reminded her of something from childhood (that she couldn't put her finger on) that comforted her. It wasn't so much sexual as it was comfortign to her, though this isn't to say she couldn't enjoy it, even strongly, in a sexual manner. Also had a good/bad alternation complex like Alla, though to a lesser and more controlled extent. (Ultimately, though, it still caused her to be unstable.)

Danny: Loved blood and bleeding. Didn't actually care much for the pain, to my understanding, just like to actually bleed and have bruises and such. Blood fetish.

I've heard, from many sources, that pain is used to enforce D/s.

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/11/2007 3:12:35 AM

Viridana

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sierraflowr

Viridana, i also do not find that pain is a turn on if i'm getting beat or something. Yet, sexually i DO like some pain. does that make sense?
the hardest thing i find is to try to explain that to a Dominant. it is just different types of pain and what the main purpose is for i think.
heck if i know lol

It does make perfect sense. At least to me. Being a masochist doesn't mean that I like all sorts of pain. I dislike toothaches and bellyaches just as much as the next person and hitting my big toe on the threshold produces nothing for me except flow of cursewords.

Sexually I do like to be slapped around a bit but in comparison to the session pain, the sexual pain would rather be defined as uncomfortabilities rather than pain. If I'm hurt too much during sex I start to fly into my masochistic headspace and the sexual arousal is gone.

It most definately is difficult to describe to your partner what the difference is between this pain and that pain and differences in the situations it is given in. But my man finally got it after months of speculations and discussions hahaha

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/11/2007 3:42:51 AM

sadomasokisti

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I'm a sadomasochist. Resons why? Guess I'm lucky (stolen from unknown author on the web).

BDSM for me is more than sex, it's bigger than sex.

For me to enjoy BDSM the session must be mutually enjoyable. If the masochist that i'm playing with isn't getting his or her fix i'm not enjoying it. Also if the sadist i'm playing with isn't enjoying it - i'm not geting my fix. I have absolutely no interest in pain outside the scene.

There is also the question about specific pain or areas where and how the pain is applied. While I enjoy fairly hevy CBT and nipple torture, I'm a total wuss when it comes to spanking and whiping.

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/11/2007 4:28:42 AM

MsStryker

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mmmmmm pain sluts.........
drools

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/11/2007 10:42:49 AM

meticulousgirl

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I've never really thought about it to be honest. I know that I like mild to moderate pain being inflicted when I have a crummy day at work my first thought is always, i need to get whipped and just let the frustration and stress go....

I've never really dug deep into the mental aspects of why on this issue though, i just know that i like it and even need it at times.

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/11/2007 2:34:48 PM

shadevarr

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I am a bit of sadomasochist as well and the pain just relaxes me, like I have been realigned with my own body.

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/11/2007 10:38:40 PM

palemale2000

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I'm the way I am because god has a sense of humor?

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RE: The nature of masochism - 7/12/2007 2:05:44 AM

litleone8620

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~ fast reply ~

I like pain during impact play, but that's about it. I don't consider myself a masochist in the true sense of the word. I'm a big baby when it comes to giving myself pain. I fall down and hurt myself, I practically cry for my mommy (this is an exaggeration, of course).

But there is just something about a d-type wielding some implement of pain, whether it's a cane, crop, belt, flogger, or his hand, that leaves me a pile of mush on the bed. Not to mention the marks that are left after. But, I only enjoy it if my partner enjoys giving it to me.

I don't know why I'm a masochist. I just enjoy being given pain.

< Message edited by litleone8620 -- 7/12/2007 2:06:25 AM >

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