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The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 10:21:40 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
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I don't know how many of you are masochists in the genuine sense, but have thought about why?
I know lots of people that do what we do, are sensualists more than they are masochists. The majority of people I have noticed tend to appreciate extreme sensation for it's erotic intent.

And most of the time that fits me as well. But I do acknowlege I am not just a sensualist. I am a masochist. In times of stress I need to delve into my masochism and vent it as if not doing so would cause me to bust apart.
I know why I am a masochist. But I am curious about others. Do you know if you are a masochist? Have you ever examined why? And if you have, can you move beyond the need?
Kyst

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

Post #: 1

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 10:33:31 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

The only conclusion I've been able to reach is that they are aliens.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_583606/mpage_1/key_masochists/tm.htm#583687
Extreme sensation play, what's hot about that for you?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_204732/mpage_1/key_except%252Cpain/tm.htm#204762
why experience pain and what motivates a sub to enjoy it?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_284469/mpage_1/key_except%252Cpain/tm.htm#284905
masochistic vs non masochistic

http://www.collarchat.com/m_428681/mpage_1/key_except%252Cpain/tm.htm#428697
masochism

http://www.collarchat.com/m_514097/mpage_1/key_except%252Cpain/tm.htm#514099
is it the pain or the act of submission?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_99877/mpage_1/key_masochism/tm.htm#99877
ds vs s&m

http://www.collarchat.com/m_319334/mpage_1/key_masochism/tm.htm#319334
question on masochism #1

http://www.collarchat.com/m_319343/mpage_1/key_masochism/tm.htm#319343
question on masochism #2

http://www.collarchat.com/m_475218/mpage_1/key_masochism/tm.htm#475218
masochism and submission, is there a conflict?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_344784/mpage_1/key_masochist/tm.htm#344784
good pain/bad pain...blurred lines?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_221596/mpage_1/key_masochist/tm.htm#221596
sensation slut

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 2

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 10:49:11 AM

Mystique567

Posts: 273
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline

Or possessed

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 3

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 10:54:24 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

lol, if me being a masochist means that i am not of this earth...i don't mind one bit...
i know lots of people that other people have described as masochists, but they themselves said something to effect of, how can i be a masochist, what i have done to me doesn't hurt? .....to them its extreme sensation...i am different...and i don't know why recieving pain turns me on...i could rationalize it with talk of endorphins and adrenaline and various other brain chemicals...but if that were true...i would at least get arroused when i recieved non-consensual pain...
but i love writhing on the ground screaming from pain that turns me on...in fact...i once had long enough to catch my breath from the pain and then asked why he stopped...
i long ago determined my brain was wired differently...so, i am just gonna go with it, to heck with the reason why...

chelle
a bi-poly-masochist

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 4

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 11:00:23 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

Heh.. I considered the alien theory as well. Or perhaps it is that we need to fly above our skin and soar with angels.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

lol, if me being a masochist means that i am not of this earth...i don't mind one bit...

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 5

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 11:07:07 AM

MissOchistic

Posts: 315
Joined: 4/30/2007
Status: offline

I am terrified of pain. The worst ways to die would be painful ones, and I freak out from stubbing my toes. Static shock is the worst; it makes me nervous to touch cars. Pain = bad.

However, I adore pain that I cause myself. It has a multitude of effects, from calming to turn on, happiness, energy. All good things.

So the idea of trusting someone else to hurt me is definitely not only erotic but romantic to me. And once I've reached that level, I do totally trust, and so I get that same effects that I get from doing it to myself. It's wonderful.

As to why I actually like it, I have no clue. Guess it's just faulty wiring :)

_____________________________

"The amount i care for Thee
is more than two, but less than three."

"Submission is a potlatch."

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 6

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 11:25:05 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

I bump metal things with my hip before touching them, so it has to go through the fabic and into less sensitive areas rather than getting the full shock on my finger. I'm notorious for getting shocks and burning out lightbulbs.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to MissOchistic)

Post #: 7

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 11:37:39 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline

I am also prone to static shock. My son always found it funny to shop with me in stores and observe the inevidible reaction. Makes me wonder about the nature of sadism as well..
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

I bump metal things with my hip before touching them, so it has to go through the fabic and into less sensitive areas rather than getting the full shock on my finger. I'm notorious for getting shocks and burning out lightbulbs.

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 8

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 1:17:38 PM

sjacket

Posts: 152
Joined: 1/4/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

I am also prone to static shock. My son always found it funny to shop with me in stores and observe the inevidible reaction. Makes me wonder about the nature of sadism as well..
Kyst

The nature of sadism? Or the sadism of nature?
And another masochist here... In fact, last year when it came time to renew the lic. plates for my car, I put in a request for vanity plates- MASOKST. A week later I got a letter from the STATE OF OHIO saying that my request had been denied as the plates were "inappropriate". How dare they call me "inappropriate"!?! Fuck 'em.

(edited cuz I can't type today)

< Message edited by sjacket -- 7/10/2007 1:19:31 PM >

_____________________________

Have you hugged your Sadist today?

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 9

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 1:42:25 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

Well it's understandable- how many people would try and get you to have an accident so you could get hurt and enjoy your pain? :) Not really fair to tease them.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to sjacket)

Post #: 10

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 1:44:25 PM

earthycouple

Posts: 4462
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissOchistic

I am terrified of pain. The worst ways to die would be painful ones, and I freak out from stubbing my toes. Static shock is the worst; it makes me nervous to touch cars. Pain = bad.

However, I adore pain that I cause myself. It has a multitude of effects, from calming to turn on, happiness, energy. All good things.

So the idea of trusting someone else to hurt me is definitely not only erotic but romantic to me. And once I've reached that level, I do totally trust, and so I get that same effects that I get from doing it to myself. It's wonderful.

As to why I actually like it, I have no clue. Guess it's just faulty wiring :)

I get somewhat excited just thinking about being able to bring you to the point of trusting me after reading your above quote.....*walks away from boards all giddy*

_____________________________

D~

Seeking, searching, hoping, living, loving, jumping. So what's new with you?

(in reply to MissOchistic)

Post #: 11

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 2:02:57 PM

daddysliloneds

Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
Status: offline

yeah, i'm a masochist, as well as a sensualist, and i know why i am the way i am as well...

can i move past it? nope, that only happens with some good old fashion pain play!

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 12

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 2:20:43 PM

sierraflowr

Posts: 59
Joined: 6/7/2005
From: Northern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

Heh.. I considered the alien theory as well. Or perhaps it is that we need to fly above our skin and soar with angels.
Kyst

Well sometimes i seriously FEEL like an alien. I AM a masochist, and a sadist. so, what is that? a sadistic masochist , or a masochistic sadist?
and heavans help subby hubby if i am in a sadistic mood mwhahah :)

_____________________________

~flowr
O};-
When I let go of who I am,
I become who I might be.
-Lao Tzu

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 13

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 2:26:30 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

The traditional term is "sadomasochist" Trust me, you aren't really alone!

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to sierraflowr)

Post #: 14

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 2:33:52 PM

Faramir

Posts: 1043
Joined: 2/12/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissOchistic
So the idea of trusting someone else to hurt me is definitely not only erotic but romantic to me. And once I've reached that level, I do totally trust, and so I get that same effects that I get from doing it to myself. It's wonderful.

Christian author and BDSM kinkster CS Lewis wrote something I really liked about sadism and masochism. I don't have the book in front of me, but to paraphrase: "The sadist says 'I will do this and this to you--do you still love me?' To which the masochist replies 'Oh yes, that and more do I love you.'"

_____________________________

True masters, true subs and slaves, X many years in the lifestyle, Old Guard this and High Protocol that--it's like a convention of D&D nerds were allowed to have sex once, and they decided to make a religion out of it.

(in reply to MissOchistic)

Post #: 15

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 2:44:46 PM

Viridana

Posts: 754
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Missokyst

I don't know how many of you are masochists in the genuine sense, but have thought about why?
I know lots of people that do what we do, are sensualists more than they are masochists. The majority of people I have noticed tend to appreciate extreme sensation for it's erotic intent.

And most of the time that fits me as well. But I do acknowlege I am not just a sensualist. I am a masochist. In times of stress I need to delve into my masochism and vent it as if not doing so would cause me to bust apart.
I know why I am a masochist. But I am curious about others. Do you know if you are a masochist? Have you ever examined why? And if you have, can you move beyond the need?
Kyst

I'm a masochist. I actually have no idea why I am one or how it became so. I have childhood memories of me hurting myself because it felt so good. My man always planned sessions with everything culminating to sexual arousal or sex, but it never worked for me. I don't connect the pain to sexual stimulation. I just enjoy it for it's own sake. My man took it for granted that I'd be excited and was quite supprised to see my reaction to the stimuli... and me too. I thought I "was supposed to" become horny by spanking.

It took quite a few sessions to realize the connection between pain and libido was non-existant. Now, the play only involves SM to the extent of making me feel the runners high and him getting his top ego stroked. And yes, I've discovered that I yearn for a session more, when I've had a long and stressful day. It's a huge mental and physical release for me. I've also had such a yearning for a session that I thought I'd explode. When I finally got my session I actually fell asleep in the middle of the session (yes I didn't think it was possible either). But it was The nicest lullaby there is

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 16

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 3:24:27 PM

lateralist1

Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline

I'm a sadomasochist as well. And yes I can get past it. It's hard but it's possible.
I'm not sure if it's sexual for me. I always assumed it was but I doubt it at times.
Until I find the right submissive partner I won't know.
If I do and it works then I don't think I will mind not knowing what it's all about.

(in reply to Viridana)

Post #: 17

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 4:24:46 PM

salilus

Posts: 201
Joined: 5/18/2007
Status: offline

I love pain. I don't know why but it does make stress and tension go away.

There is no 'turning point' or experience in my childhood, however, that caused me to like pain.

(in reply to Missokyst)

Post #: 18

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 5:21:33 PM

sierraflowr

Posts: 59
Joined: 6/7/2005
From: Northern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Faramir
Christian author and BDSM kinkster CS Lewis wrote something I really liked about sadism and masochism. I don't have the book in front of me, but to paraphrase: "The sadist says 'I will do this and this to you--do you still love me?' To which the masochist replies 'Oh yes, that and more do I love you.'"

wow, honestly did not know CS Lewis was also a kinkster! Thank you for that information.

_____________________________

~flowr
O};-
When I let go of who I am,
I become who I might be.
-Lao Tzu

(in reply to Faramir)

Post #: 19

RE: The nature of masochism - 7/10/2007 5:23:41 PM

sierraflowr

Posts: 59
Joined: 6/7/2005
From: Northern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

The traditional term is "sadomasochist" Trust me, you aren't really alone!

Yes i know it was

just playing with words!

_____________________________

~flowr
O};-
When I let go of who I am,
I become who I might be.
-Lao Tzu

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 20

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