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RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 6:20:24 AM

cjenny

Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline

The only mail I tend to not answer are those that have just one or two words.
'Hi'
'Hello girl'
That sort of thing. Sometimes I answer but typically not. Otherwise I do my best to return mail with some sort of note. I figure for some, mailing a stranger is a bit hard so I just want to reciprocate. I've made a lot of friends that way that otherwise would have never met here.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.

~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to Master2Bindngagu)

Post #: 21

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 7:25:11 AM

GhitaAmati

Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline

Question...how do yall know if someone has read your message or not? I must still be new at this because I didnt realize that was an option. I read every message that comes accross. If its totally ignorant, I dont respond at all, but anything legitimate, I will respond as soon as I get the opportunity. Its pretty obvious if someone hasnt read my profile (ie: my profile says "not looking, only here to stay in contact with friends") and I still get messages asking if I want to relocate to canada. Not sure why anyone here thinks Im going to leave my husband, pack up my three kids, sell my house, and move to another country for someone who cant read.....(sorry, personal rant of the day)

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 22

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 7:45:18 AM

HaveRopeWillBind

Posts: 514
Joined: 7/15/2006
Status: offline

Ghita,

Hit the "Read Mail" button, then hit the "Sent Mail" button on top center of the mail page. You will see your recently sent mail and it will show either when it was read, if it is not yet read, or if it was deleted without being read.

Now about that leaving your husband and packing the kids to Canada, wellllll, I'm not quite in Canada, still in the US barely..... <grin>

(in reply to GhitaAmati)

Post #: 23

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 8:08:20 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

i received my first *deleted unread* by a dom in my area and it didn't bother me at all ...in fact i posted a journal entry last week about it. i feel it's his lost not mine and i move on. i cannot make the dom send a message back yet it would have been nice if the person did.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Master2Bindngagu)

Post #: 24

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 10:49:49 AM

Master2Bindngagu

Posts: 9
Joined: 12/23/2004
Status: offline

Thanks for all the input everyone, I appreciate it, makes me feel a little better that there are people out there who do have hearts and brains inside them. To the women out there who get emails like hi, whats up, or Nice shoes, wanna screw type things, I honestly dont blame you for not replying, they obviously put no effort in their email or send that to everyone.

On the subject of emailing, I know no ones a so called expert on things, and a lot of people have no idea what to write on a profile, and thats totally understandable, but maybe if people put general requirements on them, it might make things easier. Obviously someone who categorizes themselves as "Lesbian Female Submissive" is not looking for men, but a lot of people dont write what they are looking for, maybe that would be a good idea for a subsection of the main profile. Age, race, Dom/sub/switch, location, would make things easier (but then again, most people dont actually read the profiles, so hmm, whats the point?) Kind of a catch 22.

Some great attitudes on this forum, I wish some of the people on the personals section shared them :)

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 25

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 11:06:56 AM

snappykappy

Posts: 616
Joined: 3/5/2005
Status: offline

wishing u a super duper fantabulous awesome day
thomas michael

(in reply to Master2Bindngagu)

Post #: 26

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 11:16:33 AM

popeye1250

Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline

I tend to send short notes to women I might be interested in because I have a very fully filled out profile and to say much more I'd just be repeating myself.
And if they don't answer back I just figure they're not interested.

_____________________________

"But Your Honor, this is not a Jury of my Peers, these people are all decent, honest, law-abiding citizens!"

(in reply to snappykappy)

Post #: 27

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 11:44:28 AM

SirDaniel

Posts: 93
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Las Vegas
Status: offline

To me it comes down to one thing and I believe this person said it best so why re-invent the wheel?

quote:

" I do believe in a certain amount of respect, but its that of two vanilla human beings as opposed to that of a Dom/me and their submissive. "

Respect! NOT Dom/me submissive respect but, respect as one human to an other. They also used to have a button you could click on that said "Thanks no thanks" or words to that effect. So with that in mind. How lazy NOT to reply.

_____________________________

Sir Daniel
Las Vegas (Sin City), NV

http://members.cox.net/sirdaniel

quote:

Be true, honest, caring and loving,
and you will be found.
It is true, be you Master or slave.

(in reply to Master2Bindngagu)

Post #: 28

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 1:50:38 PM

popeye1250

Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline

And then there's the profiles that have nice pictures and then as you're flipping through them there's pictures of cats and dogs!
What the hell's that all about?
I would assume that those are pictures of their pets but why do I need to see a picture of someone's pet if we've never communicated before?
How would someone going through my pictures like to all of a sudden see a picture of my 15 pound TomCat "Bubba" licking his nuts?
Please! No pet pictures!
Or Flowers! If you want to meet someone why would you put a picture of a flower in your profile pics?
"I'm like a flower on a windy day."
"I work for FTD."
"Gee, she must like flowers! How origional."
Ladies, most *guys* don't like flowers.
We like guns, cars, trucks, and a whole bunch of other things but not flowers.

_____________________________

"But Your Honor, this is not a Jury of my Peers, these people are all decent, honest, law-abiding citizens!"

(in reply to SirDaniel)

Post #: 29

RE: Messages on here - 7/1/2007 2:05:50 PM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDaniel

To me it comes down to one thing and I believe this person said it best so why re-invent the wheel?

quote:

" I do believe in a certain amount of respect, but its that of two vanilla human beings as opposed to that of a Dom/me and their submissive. "

Respect! NOT Dom/me submissive respect but, respect as one human to an other. They also used to have a button you could click on that said "Thanks no thanks" or words to that effect. So with that in mind. How lazy NOT to reply.

what you seek is not respect but courtesy.

That the world is lacking in this department is a fact.....In Chicago if I am walking by a stranger and I say, "Good morning" I will usually get a response....Not always. If I let someone "in" during traffic I might get a wave of thanks or some sort of acknowledgemnet...It is not gauranteed...And that is pretty much face to face intraction.

Out here you have no idea who you are actually messaging....Are they even a woman?...Is their profile real or remotely accurate?

If courtesy is lacking in the real world I definitely would expect less from the "profiles" that are running around on the net....I believe it is only common sense to approach it in this matter....If I send an introduction I do so at my own risk....The time it takes to type an intro is minimal...the little time spent is my only investment at this point in time.

_____________________________

(in reply to SirDaniel)

Post #: 30

RE: Messages on here - 7/2/2007 6:19:21 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

quote:

To quote Katy "A lack of response IS a response"

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 31

RE: Messages on here - 7/2/2007 8:57:42 AM

Sinergy

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

To quote Katy "A lack of response IS a response"

While you've posted your thread here in a much more mature way than most, we get this question about twice a month or more. An email from a stranger does NOT carry any obligation to respond. Accept and move on, anything else just makes you sound like an entitled whiner.

While I am on the team that generally does not have an inbox flooded with 10,000,000,000 emails a day, I take the time to respond to people who send me an email. This applies even if I get nasty emails. They may just be one sentence, like...

"Thank you for that lucid dissertation on my character flaws"

or

"Point taken, enjoy your evening."

or

"I appreciate you taking the time to point out that the United States was at war with Japan and Germany, as opposed to Bahrain and Moldavia, during World War 2, as I erroneously pointed out in my post. I will go back and edit it to correct my mistake. Take care."

or whatever.

Since I get 3 emails a year, writing these emails does not cut into my otherwise idle hours. For those who get zillions of emails, I would point out that the adage "No response IS a response" applies in spades.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 32

RE: Messages on here - 7/2/2007 9:02:30 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

Sometimes it is in a person's best interest not to reply. In my experience it often leads to more inquiries and pleas trying to convince you why you should continue a conversation or meet them for coffee. So I've decided that no reply is usually the best option. Just recently I've been flooded by 4 lengthy cut/paste messages from the same sender. How much worse would it be if I responded?

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Sinergy)

Post #: 33

RE: Messages on here - 7/2/2007 9:04:25 AM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline

That was me. I won't do it again until at least...tomorrow.

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 34

RE: Messages on here - 7/2/2007 9:09:05 AM

GhitaAmati

Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline

quote:

Ladies, most *guys* don't like flowers.
We like guns, cars, trucks, and a whole bunch of other things but not flowers.

Last time I checked, I wasnt a guy...yet I enjoy guns, trucks, hunting, fishing, and college football....oh...and I like flowers.

Im going to assume that putting pet pictures up might be along the lines of saying "if you want to have a serious relationship somewhere down the road, you might wanna think twice if your allergic to cats/dogs/birds/fish/iguanas/etc"

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 35

RE: Messages on here - 7/2/2007 9:09:35 AM

Sinergy

Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

Sometimes it is in a person's best interest not to reply. In my experience it often leads to more inquiries and pleas trying to convince you why you should continue a conversation or meet them for coffee. So I've decided that no reply is usually the best option. Just recently I've been flooded by 4 lengthy cut/paste messages from the same sender. How much worse would it be if I responded?

There was a situation where the one I was with was attacked in an email. I wrote to the person who did that and asked him politely to cease and desist contacting her.

Needless to say, I got a scathing attacking email.

So I took the time to respond politely that I had asked him nicely to leave us alone and go about his business, and he could either continue wasting his time writing lengthy emails which we would simply delete, or he could go find somebody else who would respond.

I got another scathing attacking email.

This one I did not reply to. The modus operandi of an abusive person, is that the abuser will continue attempting to be abusive until they get bored and wander away, but every response of any sort from the abusee starts the whole cycle over from the beginning.

Sinergy

p.s. This was months ago, the person got bored and wandered away.

p.p.s. Yay.

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle

(in reply to KatyLied)

Post #: 36

RE: Messages on here - 7/2/2007 9:11:10 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

quote:

That was me. I won't do it again until at least...tomorrow.

Please turn off the caps lock next time. Thanks in advance. : )

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Aileen68)

Post #: 37

RE: Messages on here - 7/2/2007 9:22:37 AM

Ysabo

Posts: 21
Joined: 4/8/2007
Status: offline

*laughing my ass off at Ghita arriving in Canada with her three kids - imagine Mr Illiterate's face!*

I like your new pic, Ghita, good closeup *smiles*

(in reply to GhitaAmati)

Post #: 38

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