quote:

ORIGINAL: ELUSIVE1

I did share this analogy with him,his response was "If we are going to push, test, or intentionally go past your limits (notice I said we, not I  ) then we need to determine what the context and the "ground rules" are ahead of time. You definitely need to feel comfortable that, when all is said and done, you will not be injured, arrested or plummeting toward the earth without a parachute. To use your analogy, I'm asking you to trust me enough to give me control of the ripcord - we may pull the parachute a little (or a lot) closer to the ground than you are normally used to, but we are going to land safely.
...it is no wonder I am totally smitten

• "your limits"
  
• "go past" [how far, how long, with what, after care ????]
  
• "ground rules" [he should already know what your base ground rules are if he is asking for no-safe word]
  
• "feel comfortable" [what would make you comfortbale?? what could he do/not do?]
  
• "not be injured" [unm, in what ways? what does "injured" include??? -- ex: some might say spanking was "injured"....]
  
• "plummeting toward the earth without a parachute" [ Great, it's great he doesn't want you to feel that way-- but guess what? He's not a mind reader. What makes people feel that way is different for everyone]
  
• "pull the parachute a litte" [ How much is a "little" ??? How much is appropriote? whille still pushing the limits but still safe???]
  
• "closer to the ground" [ Unm, HOW close is close? ]
  
• "normally used to" [ahh-- ????]
  
• "land safely"  [ so, does that mean if you are not dead you have "landed safely"?  If you are not crying have you landed safely? If you are not bleeding, running away, or biting his ear off have you landed safely?]

quote:

ORIGINAL: RchmdServiceNeed

quote:

ORIGINAL: ELUSIVE1

I did share this analogy with him,his response was "If we are going to push, test, or intentionally go past your limits (notice I said we, not I  ) then we need to determine what the context and the "ground rules" are ahead of time. You definitely need to feel comfortable that, when all is said and done, you will not be injured, arrested or plummeting toward the earth without a parachute. To use your analogy, I'm asking you to trust me enough to give me control of the ripcord - we may pull the parachute a little (or a lot) closer to the ground than you are normally used to, but we are going to land safely.
...it is no wonder I am totally smitten

No offense, but that sounds like a complete load of crap.

Kinda like if someone asked me to marry them and said they would "take care of me forever" -- Unm, do they mean pay all the bills?..... Me pay the bills but they stand in the yard with a shot gun?...... me pay the bills, weild the shot gun, but they "care about" me?
I mean seriously.

That is a flowery load of crap.
Of *course* he wants to think he can take care of you, "land you safele", feel like you trust him, not kill you, etc etc. --- But WHAT EXACTLY  would that intail??

Terms that need SPECIFIC definition:

• "your limits"
  
• "go past" [how far, how long, with what, after care ????]
  
• "ground rules" [he should already know what your base ground rules are if he is asking for no-safe word]
  
• "feel comfortable" [what would make you comfortbale?? what could he do/not do?]
  
• "not be injured" [unm, in what ways? what does "injured" include??? -- ex: some might say spanking was "injured"....]
  
• "plummeting toward the earth without a parachute" [ Great, it's great he doesn't want you to feel that way-- but guess what? He's not a mind reader. What makes people feel that way is different for everyone]
  
• "pull the parachute a litte" [ How much is a "little" ??? How much is appropriote? whille still pushing the limits but still safe???]
  
• "closer to the ground" [ Unm, HOW close is close? ]
  
• "normally used to" [ahh-- ????]
  
• "land safely"  [ so, does that mean if you are not dead you have "landed safely"?  If you are not crying have you landed safely? If you are not bleeding, running away, or biting his ear off have you landed safely?]

Hon, EVERYONE wants what you just wrote.
What you wrote is just the basis of BDSM.
The problem is: How to do it in the practical world since everyone is different with the mental & physical needs.

Most people do that with a LOT of communication and reserving safe words for when prior communication fails so that that goal [that you just wrote he wanted] can be achieved without anyone crashing to the ground.




Personally, I think this "no safe word" thing has way more to do with his own ego than you dear, and that would be a problem for me.

The subs in favor of no safeword seem to be with Doms they have talked a lot with, Feel like they know, and ALSO seem to know themselves and what they are wanting.
He does not know enough about you.
But more importantly I don't really think you know enough about yourself to make that type of commitment.

I do wish you the best of luck and whille no-safe word can be fine for somepeople, or fine for people that are nervous to work up to I really do not think it is SAFE for you to be doing right now.

Beyond Safe, I don't get the impression it's what you WANT, which is enough of a reason on it's own.