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different orgasms - 6/28/2007 2:52:46 AM   
pussinbootz


Posts: 40
Joined: 6/27/2007
Status: offline 		Hi all

Although I am 33 my sexual experience up to the last 12 months has been very crap.. abusive partners etc...this has meant I haven't enjoyed a lot of the sex I've had in the past.. thus not many orgasms with people.. plenty on my own though.

Thing is, this has lead me to a bit of confusion when it comes to terminology with orgasms and the word cum... (i feel like a 16 year old asking these questions!!!!)

I've heard of different orgasms in as much as g-spot ones, clitoral ones etc... but I'm still trying to work out what happens with me.

There are the ones that I would consider low intensity, just waves of pleasure that I can have for hours... these are what I have most of the time and can be triggered by something as simple as a dirty text from my guy or him pulling my hair up to him playing with my clit etc.

Then there are the "over the edge" ones that are generally triggered with a vibe on my clit... after one of these I go hypersensetive and simply cannot go any further or cope with being touched.  I also find that penetration is difficult after this as I close up (I have had vaginismus in the past so this is possibly something to do with this).. also sometimes when I have this type my libido is dead for days, almost like I've ticked some primeval box that says "yep done what I need to do to get pregnant, don't need any more for a while".. something that I find REALLY annoying!!!

I know I haven't had a g-spot, squirting, one yet...

I consider the first type "cumming" and the second type an orgasm... but i don't really know.

Thing is, MM wants me to cum on command, which I would love to learn, but only the first type as I simply couldn't cope with more than one of the second type....

So, can anyone do a "orgasm 101" for me to help me understand what it's all about?

God I feel so stupid asking this sort of question at my age... but sexually I am still a teenager.. but growing up FAST and loving every second of it!!!!

Cheers

Puss
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 3:03:01 AM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline 		from my perspective both are orgasms (or cumming), just different intensity.  i agree, when you get the big O, the whole body says "enough is enough" and all i really want to do is nap for about a half hour....and the less intense ones, i can keep going for several hours with.

i know one person who can cum on command...and it took her Master several months to get her to that point.  all Sir asks me to do is ask permission to cum, and that's hard enough on its own sometimes.

according to the experts, all orgasms are equal, they all result from the same bundle of nerve endings being stimulated, whether via clitoris, or g-spot, whatever.  i dont worry so much about that....its all good.  :)

good luck with the training...

kitten, who knows she's blessed in being able to climax easily

(in reply to pussinbootz)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 3:28:13 AM   
instynctive


Posts: 2726
Status: offline 		I think the secret to cumming "on demand" is you need to set your worries, fears and concerns aside for that moment in time, and allow yourself to visualize the sensations you have when you are having sex.. penetrating and/or oral... get yourself wrapped up in the moment and let loose with the juices...

I've been fortunate with b.  She has been cumming on commend for me even before we "officially" started playing.. via IM while W/we were at our respective jobs 6 states apart.. and/or on the phone... and it appears that I may have found her a sister sub who is capable of the same thing.



(in reply to adoracat)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 3:32:36 AM   
pussinbootz


Posts: 40
Joined: 6/27/2007
Status: offline 		Hiya

thanks for the info on cumming on command.. I have actually started a thread about it in the "ask a sub" forum... here I'm trying to learn about orgasms in general.

But, again, thanks heaps for the info

(in reply to instynctive)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 3:53:36 AM   
MsPleasure


Posts: 215
Joined: 1/1/2007
Status: offline 		Love this thread.  First off, there are no stupid questions, always ask.  The way I was raised the only advise when it came to sex was "keep your panties up and skirt down".   Everything else I had to learn on my own.

I would say half the battle is over because you know what to do to make yourself cum.  You also recognize different orgasms.  I went through orgasm issues when I was your age.  I could cum on my own but not with my parter.

You will have to meet an understanding, attentive, and persistant partner thats willing to work with you.  I know there is a squirt in you.  Continue to explore your body from head to toe and be honest with what feels good to You.  Don't fake it, if hes not doing it for you, them let him know.  Also know that orgasms aren't restricted to the vaginal area.  You could cum from kissing, nipple stimulation sensual massage, butt play and toe sucking etc. The key is to really relax, breath deeply and let out any noises no matter how weird they sound.   I know I will laugh, sound like an animal, opera, scream and sometimes cry.    Around your age I found out that I had about 5 different orgasms, the tremor,  the wave,  convulsions, squirting screaming maniac and the crying orgasm. I could have multiple orgasms and didn't even know it.  I had everything I needed all along but a special person, helped me bring it out. 

You mentioned cumming on command and I haven't experienced that yet. Someone once told me that there are orgasms and then there is the climax, but just like adoracat stated... they are ALL good.  Enjoy.....

< Message edited by MsPleasure -- 6/28/2007 4:23:45 AM >

(in reply to pussinbootz)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 5:59:20 AM   
slaveish


Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: instynctive

I've been fortunate with b.  She has been cumming on commend for me even before we "officially" started playing.. via IM while W/we were at our respective jobs 6 states apart.. and/or on the phone... and it appears that I may have found her a sister sub who is capable of the same thing.



~opening her mouth~

~closing her mouth~

~chuckle~

How to put this .........................................................

Well, Sir, I would say that you are fortunate to have two women who really want to please you.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

(in reply to instynctive)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 6:24:06 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		My opinion is that someone exploring orgasm and healthy sexuality for the first time is a bad person to be exploring controlling orgasms with.  You should be shown it all before things are taken off the table.

Orgams are different it is just that Western science isn't smart enough to realize that yet, they only discovered the G spot in the last few decades, something that has been known in the East for centuries, called female ejaculation a myth, etc.  They will catch up.

G spot orgasms do not require nor must be with ejaculation, just as in the male, orgasm and ejaculation are not tied together.

As for orgasm on command, I have always thought that most of that was rubbish.  I have seen people who "do" it but for me, I think it is a performance act and a silly one.  Roll over and play dead too.  Flame away...

(in reply to slaveish)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 6:53:46 AM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		Heh I got laughed at in another thread here for asking what the difference between 'cumming' & 'orgasming' is.
I still don't get the difference.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.


~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 6:54:19 AM   
pussinbootz


Posts: 40
Joined: 6/27/2007
Status: offline 		no flames here.. you're entitled to your opinion.

We're not trying to control my orgasms, just make them more frequent.. not that they need any help to be honest... I don't know.  I guess coz we're both very new but I'm a couple of steps further down this bdsm path than MM I am sort of leading the way a little and if he comes up with something that he wants me to do I jump at the opportunity to do it for him.

If he wants it, and I am happy to do it, then I'll do my damndest to learn it.

But.... he doesn't want to stop me cumming when I want to, just ALSO when he wants me to... but, as I said that's another thread....


_____________________________

In life I am his equal... in the bedroom, his collared sub.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 6:56:37 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael
As for orgasm on command, I have always thought that most of that was rubbish.  I have seen people who "do" it but for me, I think it is a performance act and a silly one.  Roll over and play dead too.  Flame away...


I agree....and the performers are always really bad too!

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 7:02:07 AM   
onmykneesforhim


Posts: 112
Joined: 6/18/2006
Status: offline 		I have not seen the other thread, but I think one leads up to the other. You can just have an orgasm but to cum you must first orgasm The conclusion or an orgasm is to cum... jmo
hg

(in reply to cjenny)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 7:15:03 AM   
GhitaAmati


Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

As for orgasm on command, I have always thought that most of that was rubbish.  I have seen people who "do" it but for me, I think it is a performance act and a silly one.  Roll over and play dead too.  Flame away...


Not to long ago I took my husband to his first play party, where we watched a girl "cum" on command. He whipered to me, asking if I could do that, I told him no and that if anyone had ever told me to, I just faked it. He laughed. Later on, a few other girls asked what he was laughing about during the scene and I told them. They all agreed with me, I was glad cause I kinda thought I was the only one who had been faking it for all those years.

Now, as far as different types of orgasms, I definantly agree there is a difference, and after that really big earth shattering one, all I really want to do it sleep and god forbid someone actually try and touch my clit again within the next few hours. I once crawled up and over someones headboard trying to get away from them. Different sensations give different results, and Im going to venture to say those results will be different for different people. It is something you will have to learn about your own body, and at least the studying will be fun!

(in reply to onmykneesforhim)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 7:26:23 AM   
SeeksOnlyOne


Posts: 2012
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline 		i was actually trained to cum on command.....it was not fake, but not as simple as "cum now" either.....he tricked me because i had claimed it was impossible-lol

it took a few months, and the first time it happened, i was surprised and amazed.....he had me doing kegals at every opportunity.......after a few months of doing this, i got stronger with those muscles, they would stimulate my clit in many ways, but never to orgasm, just very pleasant feelings, and it also intensified my orgasms.....

the first time he said "cum now" to me, after i had been kegaling hard for about 15 minutes, the words, coupled with the sensations i was already feeling, made me explode in a way i can not describe.  it amazed me, scared me in some ways, and it lasted for a good long time too. 

this may not be what some define as cumming on demand-i doubt it would work, if say i was on the floor scrubbing with bleach and he said cum now without the build up.  but it did work-with no stimulation other than the kegals, and after that first time, it worked each and every time.

i have also discovered that kegals can restart an orgasm when i think it is over. 

damn now ill be kegaling all day.......some days i really miss that man-lol.

_____________________________

it aint no good til it hurts just a little bit....jimmy somerville

in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

(in reply to GhitaAmati)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 7:36:20 AM   
GhitaAmati


Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline 		OK, now that Ive read her post, I need to clarify something...if we are in the middle of playing..and something has already been stimulating my clit..and im told to cum then.....then I can often use just his voice to knock me over the edge so to speak...I was refferring to the people who want you to cum on command in the middle of the day while your washing dishes with no build up and no stimulation anywhere....thats what I think is immpossible.....at least for me

(in reply to SeeksOnlyOne)
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RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 7:39:00 AM   
SeeksOnlyOne


Posts: 2012
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati

OK, now that Ive read her post, I need to clarify something...if we are in the middle of playing..and something has already been stimulating my clit..and im told to cum then.....then I can often use just his voice to knock me over the edge so to speak...I was refferring to the people who want you to cum on command in the middle of the day while your washing dishes with no build up and no stimulation anywhere....thats what I think is immpossible.....at least for me



but that would be a helluva distraction from dishes huh? im not sure how clean they would actually be though.

_____________________________

it aint no good til it hurts just a little bit....jimmy somerville

in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

(in reply to GhitaAmati)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 7:50:08 AM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		Can someone explain to me then the difference between cumming and orgasming? Please use small words  so I understand because at this point I am totally clueless! Thankies.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.


~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to SeeksOnlyOne)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 7:56:26 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		-cumming-
-orgasming-

see the difference?
hope this helps.
(you aren't missing out on anything)
Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


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Profile   Post #: 17
RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 8:00:33 AM   
GhitaAmati


Posts: 3263
Joined: 5/30/2007
Status: offline 		spelling...thats the difference

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Profile   Post #: 18
RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 8:03:01 AM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

-cumming-
-orgasming-

see the difference?
hope this helps.
(you aren't missing out on anything)
Ron


So it's just one of those 'my twue way' thingies? It's weird cuz in that other thread (no, I can't find it lol) some insisted that there is a difference but I just couldn't grasp it!
Thankies Ron

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.


~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: different orgasms - 6/28/2007 8:03:41 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I use cumming and orgasming completely interchangeably, they mean the same to me.

But of course there are many different types and variations of an orgasm.  I was confused when I first started having "multiple" orgasms because it was much more like one long orgasm just going up and down in waves of intensity.  But multiple was the best word I had for it.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to cjenny)
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