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Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 7:12:48 AM

Mysia

Posts: 45
Joined: 2/3/2006
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During one of our (group of friends) many "wandering thoughts" episodes, someone asked "What happens to the aged submissives without a dominant? Nursing home time?"

This got me to wondering... is there a retreat or center or "home" that houses (or assists in living) retired submissives? Does anyone know of such a place? Or this just too far-fetched idea? Or?

Post #: 1

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 7:15:16 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
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I don't know of any particularly geared towards submissives only. If enough got together for it, I'm sure they could make it happen, but I'd never want to live in such a community.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 2

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 7:15:47 AM

Missokyst

Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
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Too far-fetched an idea. This is one reason I think people should work. You never know what can happen in the future.
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mysia

During one of our (group of friends) many "wandering thoughts" episodes, someone asked "What happens to the aged submissives without a dominant? Nursing home time?"

This got me to wondering... is there a retreat or center or "home" that houses (or assists in living) retired submissives? Does anyone know of such a place? Or this just too far-fetched idea? Or?

_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 3

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 7:37:09 AM

spankmepink11

Posts: 1310
Joined: 9/28/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mysia

During one of our (group of friends) many "wandering thoughts" episodes, someone asked "What happens to the aged submissives without a dominant? Nursing home time?"

I imagine the same thing that happens to single people of any orientation

This got me to wondering... is there a retreat or center or "home" that houses (or assists in living) retired submissives? Does anyone know of such a place? Or this just too far-fetched idea? Or?

I think it's far fetched....and not sure what difference it would make if the submissive is in need of a nursing home, I doubt that if they are not able to care for themselves, that being able to maintain "submissive" status is high on the priority list. What exactly is a "retired submissive" ?

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 4

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 7:54:52 AM

chiaThePet

Posts: 2694
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mysia

During one of our (group of friends) many "wandering thoughts" episodes, someone asked "What happens to the aged submissives without a dominant? Nursing home time?"

This got me to wondering... is there a retreat or center or "home" that houses (or assists in living) retired submissives? Does anyone know of such a place? Or this just too far-fetched idea? Or?

Let's see, they'll take our money, put us in a crowded room with others like
us, submitting to powerful Women dressed in uniforms, force us into eating
what they give us, make us surrender to enemas while in retraints, demand
we submit to their fun little board games, dress us up in cute flowery gowns
with our asses exposed, verbally humiliate us when we make little messes,
poke and prod us with implements of various design, give us little prescriptive
treats to keep us happily complient, yep, sounds pretty much like same old
same old to me. Home Sweet Home!

With Love and Respect, chia* (the pet)

_____________________________

Love is a many splendid sting.

You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 5

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 8:06:28 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

I know of several older Dominants who want to make this happen, but haven't started as of yet. One of them I really believe could do it.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 6

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 8:08:28 AM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mysia

... is there a retreat or center or "home" that houses (or assists in living) retired submissives? Does anyone know of such a place? Or this just too far-fetched idea? Or?

This makes me very sad for some reason - to think that a person's whole identity is "submissive" that there is nothing else to stimulate them outside of a D/s relationship that they would feel they needed to go into a "home".

i suppose my mindset is differet though - i know for a fact that i can not possibly live long enough to do and experience all the things i wish to do before i wear this body out. To even think of spending any part of my life in a retirement home is a horror greater than any thing i can think of - including being alone~

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 7

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 8:23:52 AM

vield

Posts: 354
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

I know of one project that a number of people have been working on known as "Welcome Home". The person working on organizing the BD/SM retirement community I heard about is Vi Johnson, a well known person in the scene for many years. Vi was an "old guard" slave for many years, an author and was an important person to the scene in several parts of the country. She has spoken and worked on fund raising at a number of BD/SM regional events.
I do not know if this project has yet decided upon a site or not as I have been out of touch with them for a couple of years.
I believe her concept included assisted living for dominants, switches and submissives of any sexual diversity, with visitors lodging for friends, family or partners not in need of assisted living.

_____________________________

As always, your mileage may vary!

vield

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 8

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 8:28:10 AM

truesub4u

Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
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I dunno, being somewhat retired myself. I find staying my happy as home and going to live in some "home" for retired submissives is just fine with me. But then again I have always lived a dominant life and have fended for myself since teenage years.

No wait, let me refraze this... I'm not even somewhat retired. I never considered my submission a job. I didn't get paid for it. (Got some great bonuses over the years...lol) So i'm not retired, not ready to be put out to pasture. And certainly capable of making it on my own as I have so done for many of years. So any aspects of being places in a home for retired sub/slaves... umm... No thanks.

_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to dawntreader)

Post #: 9

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 9:30:25 AM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

not too far-fetched if i ever decide to turn my cruise ship thread into a reality ....you never know

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...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 10

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 10:04:29 AM

MiladyElaine

Posts: 1086
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline

I knew of a Domme in NMex. that was talking about a home for neglected subs. I don't know if She ever made it a reality or not.
I intend to let My slave have a retirement account at work or save for him in case anything were to happen to Me and he was to become ill with cancer or some such awful fate he would at least have that along with a roof over his head.

_____________________________

A crazy quilt is warm but oddly put together.

Milady

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

Post #: 11

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 10:12:40 AM

nyrisa

Posts: 1830
Joined: 11/20/2006
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This is probably not the direction your question was headed, but it sort of relates, and is a question I have always wondered about. What happens to slaves, who "renounce" all family, all ties, career, etc, by their Master's preference, and devote their lives totally to serving him (or her)? When they wear out, can't take the pace, no longer meet the required standard for appearance, endurance, servitude? If a slave is a beloved pet, then perhaps his/her declining years have been considered. If a slave is merely "property", then what happens to devalued property? Is it dumped on the curb? Many people trade in a car every couple of years, so they always have a new, shiney one. After all, if the focus is the owner's pleasure and satisfaction, then where does the slave's future needs figure in at all?

As to a retirement home for BDSM lifestylers, my concern would be at some point, mental competency has to be considered, because many, although certainly not all, elderly have problems with confusion, alzheimer's, dementia, call it what you will. A person whose mental faculties are impaired to a certain degree is not considered legally capable of informed consent, which would put them out of the running for anything more BDSM oriented than just the routine care any home would be expected to provide. Very interesting question, though.

_____________________________

A true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires. Robert Heinlein

The last thing I want to do is hurt you...but it is still on my list.

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 12

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 10:18:11 AM

dawntreader

Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: nyrisa

As to a retirement home for BDSM lifestylers, my concern would be at some point, mental competency has to be considered, because many, although certainly not all, elderly have problems with confusion, alzheimer's, dementia, call it what you will. A person whose mental faculties are impaired to a certain degree is not considered legally capable of informed consent, which would put them out of the running for anything more BDSM oriented than just the routine care any home would be expected to provide. Very interesting question, though.

Now THAT is a good point!

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to nyrisa)

Post #: 13

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 10:20:23 AM

MiladyElaine

Posts: 1086
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline

"A person whose mental faculties are impaired to a certain degree is not considered legally capable of informed consent, which would put them out of the running for anything more BDSM oriented than just the routine care any home would be expected to provide."
Good point!

_____________________________

A crazy quilt is warm but oddly put together.

Milady

(in reply to nyrisa)

Post #: 14

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 10:22:03 AM

imthatacheyouhav

Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline

I think a BDSM based retirement home in general is a great idea....but not just for subs or Doms...for everyone in the "life"

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*if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything*
**collared July 22 2007 by LordKen**

(in reply to dawntreader)

Post #: 15

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 10:33:45 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

The fantasy of the end of the relationship is similar to those about the start of relationships. There is no retirement 'chalet' in the south of France, just as there is no training 'chalet' for potential O's. People who fall into the on-line story ideas of a slave/sub burning their belongings, transferring their assets to their Master, and showing up naked, kneeling on his doorstep one chilly rainy night; may have a problem growing old, but then they've never wanted to face reality in the first place.

Should any be so fortunate to find someone to completely trust with your life; part of that decision should include consideration of the realities of life. That includes, growing old, dieing, becoming infirm, and everything that goes along with it. Life isn't all 'whips & chains'. No matter how much you pack into each day of living 24/7 as M/s, life has a way of interjecting non 'whips & chains' events. "Project out" must be a part of every considered relationship. Short term, you put your stuff in storage. Going long term, the "project out" better include the real and practical idea of death. Regardless of which side of the flogger you enjoy, you must put some thought into that reality. According to the Bible, only two people in the history of the world never died. (I teased my family and friends to identify who they were for days. Anyone know who never died, at least on Earth according to the Bible?) I doubt any of us will be the third.

In our case, beth's required to live longer than me. It's part of our 'contract'. she does not have permission to die before me, under penalty of release. When it occurs, I have provided for her and did so even before she became my wife.

However, the retirement home is a great idea. And if that doesn't work perhaps the "Solent Green" solution?

(in reply to nyrisa)

Post #: 16

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 10:59:48 AM

heartfeltsub

Posts: 1641
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline

Sick Merc, really sick.

Can hear the phrase "Solent green is people" ringing in my head now.

heartfelt

* Edited because i can't spell

< Message edited by heartfeltsub -- 5/15/2007 11:26:55 AM >

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Post #: 17

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 11:13:38 AM

LightHeartedMaam

Posts: 296
Joined: 5/12/2007
Status: offline

It is my hope, that I have prepared US for the "end" of his "submission" and that in our transition, we remain loyal friends who are always there for each other. All parties eventually end. That's reality.

_____________________________

Now that I'm older, I thought it was great that it seems I have more patience. Turns out, that I just don't give a sh*t.

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 18

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 11:19:08 AM

RavenMuse

Posts: 4030
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

Retirement?!?!? Sheesh y'all will be trying to form unions next!

When I was looking last My search age range was set between 18-35 (I find for Me the dynamic works better with older Dom/younger sub).... now If My girl happens to go before I do, unlikely given I am Male and close to a decade older, but if she does and I find Myself at age 90, alone... do you REALLY think I'm going to settle with being alone? Hell no, I'll be back searching and that age range will be from 18-85... there is NO retirement!

Putting y'all in a nursing home might make it easier to find you... but increaces the risk I'd walk out with one of the nursing staff rather than a resident when I wandered in looking for a suitable girl

_____________________________

This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

(in reply to heartfeltsub)

Post #: 19

RE: Retirement for submissives - 5/15/2007 11:19:46 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

My thought is how can I "retire" from who I am?

This would not be an option for me, I cannot envision my great grandkids visiting me at a home for submissives. It just has a level of wrongness to me.. but others may not have kids or other family, it might be an option for them.

I am also hoping that I am on my last dom, and that we last a long time together.... including those retirement years

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Mysia)

Post #: 20

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