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ORIGINAL: velvetears

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ORIGINAL: NakedGirlScout

I discovered that anyone trying to check whether she's ok results in her flying into a demented state and hurting herself, so I am stuck between a rock and a hard place in doing what a friend should do.
You could run the risk, if she's getting her life together to give her a set back if you intervene, sounds like she's very unbalanced and wouldn't need to much to send her over the edge. It's a hard call to make.

We are no longer local to one another, so I only have phone and internet to contact her anymore. She's been posting on Collarme and in her Blog, so I used to know that she was ok by visiting her profile. She was in the habit of logging on every single day for over a year, so I knew she was alive at least.
If she's been blogging have you read her entries - that can tell you something about her state of mind. 


I've been wrestling with doing nothing, or calling police in her city to go and check whether she's still alive; because she doesn't work or see anyone or talk to anyone, this person could be dead for weeks and no one would think to find her. On the other hand if she is ok she will not be understanding of my actions as being out of concern for her; I know this because I asked one of her (former) local friends to knock at her door last year when she disappeared for a week, and she lost what little composure she had over it and was even more suicidal for days.
Seems she has a pattern of disappearing. If you know she's not going to respond well to your checking up on her then i wouldn't do it. If she's hell bent on killing herself there really is little you can do for her. One visit by a police man, who will just be going through the motions, won't make a lot of difference.  They cannot force her into a hospital without someone actually saying they heard her say she was going to kill herself.  It is very, very difficult, even for family menbers, to get someone psychiatric help if they don't want it.

What can I do??? Can I put someone who was a dear loved friend out of my mind completely even if she's in danger? Or should I try to do something even if it infuriates her and wrecks any further possibility of her ever talking to me in the future? My master says I should leave her be, but I'm having trouble morally justifying doing it, as well as getting rid of images in my imagination of various horrific visions of what could have happened to her.
There really isn't much you can do. If you lived near her you could intervene by checking on her yourself, but to send a stranger (police) will only make matters worse in my estimation. 
 
i feel for you in the situation you are in, unfortunately there are times where all we can do about a situation is pray. i hope things turn out well, but in the meantime try not to worry - it won't change the situation and will only cause you stress. 
 
Just to add - most of the time people who truly plan on killing themselves never say a word about it.  If you really want to die, you're not going to warn others about your intentions, unless of course you want someone to stop you.