RE: Meeting in RT... (Full Version)

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GeekyGirl -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 6:31:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

I usually meet at a nice quiet or not so quiet bar....Or a  coffe shop.....Not trying to pick on "geekygirl" but there is no way in hell I'm talking with someone's previous master .....Just another rediculous notion like safe calls and all the rest....I value my ability to determine character and to judge a person whether there is any possibility at being compatible with one another....I often wonder how did you all function w/o all of these rediculous rules and protocols.

If it makes you happy fine...But I think most folks go on their "gut" when making decisions such as these.  And quite frankly I really don't wish to spend time with a woman who is unable to ascertain these things for herself.


It's ok Domi! You can pick on me anytime ;)

And honestly, the reason for having someone speak with my ex, as well as bringing a friend is not only safety as in "making sure he doesn't kill me" but also safety as in "making sure this is someone who would be good for me." I'm a notoriously bad judge of character and I've picked some real "winners." I'm not confident in my ability to weed out the users/abusers/losers.

However, both my ex Master and my gay friend have amazingly good BullShit Detectors and I just don't trust myself to get involved with anyone who doesn't meet their approval.

That said, I understand you wanting someone confident enough to not need that safety net!

As for how we functioned without safe calls, rules, etc, well we didn't...Internet dating is something I've been doing since pretty much my entire adult life, so the safety protocols that go along with that have always been a part of dating for me.




imthatacheyouhav -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 6:37:02 PM)

my Master and i met within about a week of making initial contact. it just seemed right.....




DiurnalVampire -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 6:40:56 PM)

If and when I meet, it is in a nice public place.  I have several very well-traveled family style restaruants in my area that I have used for this purpose. Ive met a few people since I have ben out hre, and always in these sorts of settings. I dont have a safe call, I dont have a friend come with me, and I dont have anything else set up as a safety net.  I arrive in my own car, and I leave the same way. I am usually a good judge of character, but I do not meet someone at my home, nor do I give them my address or anything of that sort until after a few meetings. Play has to wait until I am comfortable enough for that, if it is going to happen.  If someone cant deal with that... then they are obviously not seriously interested enough for my tastes anyway.
I typically meet quickly, within a week or two if I can if they are local. If they are not local, they have to be incredibly interesting for me to even consider meeting them since I have no interest in relocation and my current situation is not going to change. I am not going to consider someone who wants to move to me, or move to 24/7 at some point. So for me, thats part of the weeding down process of whom I will meet face to face.

And as to terminology, I do not consider anyone mine until well after we have met. Even thoe I have or will be meeting, Angel is the only one that is mine.

DV




leakylee -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 6:48:39 PM)

i have met within a few hours of intial email contact to a year of chatting. alot depended on where i was emotionally and mentally. this time last year i wasnt up with poly. my former owner had really soured me on it, but i have found my comfort level again. so those that have been patient and a "friend" for the last i will most likely be meeting soon. single doms i have been more open to since i came home.

the last safe call i made was because my mother knew i was going out of town to "hang" with a friend. so i let her know how i was doing. that was september. if i cant trust my own judgement, i dont need to be meeting anyone, or turning my life over to anyone either.

well those are my views anywho..

love and light
lee




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 6:49:28 PM)

quote:

general question...
How long would u wait to meet ur master/dom(me) or slave/sub/pet/toy in RT?

No more than two months from the point we decided we should meet.
quote:


Where would you first meet with the abouve said person?

Almost always at a party or event I was already planning to attend.  If I felt really good about it, we'd meet at a local restaurant.  But if they were coming from afar, picking them up or meeting them at a hotel is fine.




His1kitten -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 6:56:51 PM)

i didn't meet my One face to face until well over a year after we had started chatting.  If He would have lived closer i probably would have met him within 2-3 months.   i think we both needed that time to get to know each other. 




slaveaurora -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 7:03:04 PM)

I would not recommend doing this, but.... 
  
I met Master online in June of 1999, and the first time I saw him in person was the day I moved in with him,  10 months later.   
We have now been together for 7 yrs.    
 
a~




sillygirl09 -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 7:26:27 PM)

For me I think the initial meet should be as soon as possible, you have to see someone in person to be sure the chemistry is really there, even if you think it's there online and on the phone.  I have met people in public and private spots, it just depends on how I feel at the time, I'm still alive to talk about it too.




defiantbadgirl -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 7:34:27 PM)

I planned to meet one Master I talked to on here within a few days until I found out his idea of a public place was a motel room. My advice would be to meet in a truly public place and to not have sex until you know where the guy lives. Too many cheaters out there.




LaMistressa -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 8:04:34 PM)

I always make a first meeting at either a public place (coffee shop, restaurant or the like), and I make it clear that it's going to be just that - a first meeting (not an insta-Topping.) But my search is locally focused, so it's not like I have people travelling from BFE to have a drink with me. I haven't ended up on Nancy Grace's show or a milk carton, so it works pretty well for me. 




MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: Meeting in RT... (4/29/2007 8:22:47 PM)

No longer than a month after initial contact.




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