GoddessDustyGold
Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
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I suspected this would be your answer. And I do not disagree with you.
What I do disagree with is the fact that you had to get your son out of school via medical reasons and now continue to home educate him on the sly, so to speak. It is this sort of tolerance by parents that has to stop. You made a move in the best way you knew how. But why did you have to circumvent something that should have been your right in the first place? Who allowed such strict regulation in the first place that removed a parent's right to educate their child in the manner they see fit? How about other parents who do not bother because they assume that they have no power. We do have the power, and we should be exercising that power, each and every day. It is what this country is supposed to be about.
I live in Arizona...no secret about that. A flaming "red" state which is often put down with the other red states as stupid, right-wing and useless in the grand scheme of things. I suppose My state is one of the ones that most like to point fingers at and lay blame upon. Yet we have a large home schooling population here, and all one has to do is send information into the county regarding the intent to home school and then do so. Why is it not a problem in Arizona, but it is virtually impossible in your state?
This goes to the tolerance issue. You state that parents are not around and so the state has to take over the raising of our children. Why do the parents allow this? There is way too much apathy. On the one hand they want to abdicate important responsibilites as parents but they want to retain their rights to say "But don't you discipline my child in any way." I guess it makes sense in the consistency area, because these young ones are not receiving any legitimate discipine at home either.
I live in a small, upscale commuity. You would not think that there should be excessive problems with drugs on campus, bomb threats, lockdowns, physical fighting, yada, yada, yada. But we have it. And so does every other school district around. This is not confined to the poor and the inner city and the underprivileged. I have to draw a personal conclusion that it is about the lack of morals and a lack of more traditonal teachings in responsibility. Parents are very fast to excuse their children and force the schools/teachers to do the same. Why should the teachers care when they are fighting a losing battle? So they do the minimum they need to "pass" them along, maintain the status quo, and try to keep some peace and quiet in the classroom. They certainly can't demand focus and attention and respect. They are not going to get it, and the parents are not going to support them in the need for it. Parents don't care, the youngsters don't care because they have no example and definitely no consequences, and the others are just trying to survive in an environment that is less than condusive to the original purpose of education. Our society has reached a point where it is less important, or perhaps not important at all, to teach "This is a wrong behavior", than to make sure that everyone's self-esteem is intact, and everything is equal and fair. Guess what? Life is not equal and fair! It's wonderful in theory. It doesn't work in the real world. At least not in the sense of across the board "fairness and equality". I am not saying here that one person deserves more than another. I am saying everyone has the right to choose and make their own successes and failures and no one is responsible for that except the individual. They have the right to figure out a legal way to earn more and live a better lifestyle, if that is what they choose. And the first people that have a duty to instill this in their children are the parents. They don't want to bother. Let the state do it.
I home schooled My kids for 4 years. One part time, and the other full time. One was already in high school and wanted to remain but I always took great care and interest in everything to which both were being exposed. I was absolutely shocked (in 1996! Things are even worse now.) when My older daughter, a frosh at the high school at that time, came home crying because her friend had been beaten up in the hallway by some of the female jocks. That wasn't the worst of the shock. Both the main instigator and the victim were hauled into the office and it was determined that both would clean the lunch tables that week as a punishment. Now why was the victim being punished? Well, they had to be fair. Both girls were involved, and despite many student witnesses to the contrary, the victim was held just as repsonsible for the fight as the instigator. Nice message, isn't it? Remember too, that there is no longer any shame in having such a consequence. It is actually cool to get into trouble. Especially when you can flip off the teachers and suffer no consequences at home either.
My younger daughter, who is now a legal (over 21) adult and I have spent a reasonable amount of time discussing this Va Tech tragedy. I mentioned in another thread that she told Me about the number of students who came into her CCW class last semester with the intent to giving the instructor a hard time and attempting to prove that "guns are bad...there should be no guns allowed". They had all changed their minds by the end of the class. She also asked Me if I had ever felt powerless or intimidated by the administration when I had to deal with them during her four years. (She did go back into the public school system as a freshman. Her decision which I respected.) Especially since I was a single Mom. She works in a pre-school and has listened to some of her co-workers (single Moms) saying that they are afraid of the schools and do not feel they have any power to do anything except go along with the current, often abusive authority. I told her I never did. I was sure of My rights as a parent, and I was also sure that if My daughter had ever done anything which was against rules, whether I agree with those rules or not, she would be in as much trouble, or more, at home, as she would be in school. If I agree to rules then I am obligated to follow them. If I don't then I have (as should all) the right to move on down the road to a place where the rules are more to My liking, or I can actively work, by reasonable means, to change those rules. She never got into trouble, of course, because she was an upright student who applied herself and respected authority. But we both went in to speak with her history teacher at one point, when she was being spoon fed a politcal agenda with which I disagreed. She was also exposed to the example I set as I politely but firmly advised that teacher that she was overstepping her bounds by promoting her personal political feelings and forcing same to become a part of her curriculum. My child was pending being graded down because she had the nerve to reasonably question her teacher and try to indicate that there was another point of view. That problem was resolved very quickly. The teacher did not have a leg to stand on, but she assumed a power and attempted to misuse her authority. How many others would stand up and say "No!". Most just go along with the program. Hence these students come out of high school and move into college already prepared to swallow anything that anyone wants to say. The amount of abuse in college education is unbelievable. No longer is a paper expected regarding "Global Warming" as an example. It is to be a paper on "The Case for Global Warming". I hope you see the difference.
They are not taught how to think. They are taught what to think.
In the case of your son not pledging alliegance, I feel that is a misguided way to to protest, but it is your right to protest in that manner. I would stand up for your right to teach your child to protest in that manner. He is not calling in a bomb threat or throwing punches in the hallway. That teacher was also overstepping bounds.
If parents refuse to take the responsibility, and the nanny state is expected to handle everything, then we can't expect more than what we are seeing. They aren't doing such a great job, are they? So is the answer to allow more of the same? Or, mayhap, it is time for a different way of doing things. I sure don't see how what we are doing, or what we are allowing to be done, at this point is working.
"We the people"...Not "that's my government and they must know best".
Edited: I will disagree that we have many children who have behavioral problems that "seem" to be neurological. I don't question the behavioral problems. But I lean toward a lack of discipline, responsibility and consequences as being the reason. It is easy to blame it on something neurological. And it is easier to accept that as the reason than to look to ourselves and bear much of the responsibility.
< Message edited by GoddessDustyGold -- 4/19/2007 4:37:12 PM >
_____________________________
Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom
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