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Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 12:16:26 PM   
lostsoulskitten


Posts: 45
Joined: 4/14/2007
Status: offline
Kitten's Writing:
I keep having repeated nightmares of different things have happened in my past. And everytime I try to go to sleep, and actually fall asleep. The nightmares are there and they wake me up. Scared, even though my master is right there next to me or at the computer which is also in the bedroom.

It scares me to the point when I wake up, I feel the things that had happened to me. Honestly I am asking what to do about them. My father was abusive to me, he had burned me before he had cut me. He has done a lot too me. Yes I know a lot of people have been abused in their lives so I am not trying to down play what happened to them.

My nightmares are so vivid that I get so scared, I toss and turn. And if my master is in bed with me, I tend to hit him in his bad knee and his bad shoulder. I hate that, because I feel bad the next day that his knee hurts or his shoulder. Whenever someone's body language seem's a bit off, I think I caused them to get mad. Or upset, but they tell me that I did nothing. But I feel like I did.


I feel like cuts, showing on my skin. And the burns and welts and everything else that my father did to me, once I wake up from this nightmares. I get so scared, and in a pricky mood around my master. Feeling so bad, when he wants to cuddle and I don't because of my nightmares.  Like for example today: I am not feeling all that great as he knows, so I told him I wanted to cuddle. But then once I closed my eyes I SAW ONE OF MY NIGHTMARES. Then I told him I don't want to cuddle. Then he kinda got upset.


What should I DO?


Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 12:22:48 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		ok- this is seriious. we can talk via phone if u wish. [US calls]

the blue pages of the phone book. seek out a counseling agency that has a psychyatrist.

most likely- you need a psychotrophic medication.  [i am on  1 or 2 myself]

you need face to face counnseling.  another sourse of help is teh local batterred womans shelter.

having said that- i have nighmares that im trying to get home. im stranded on 111th street or Harlem ave. this is my inner self resenting growing up from the house i grew up in.

please make some phone calls and set up some real life help.  most places have a sliding scale if you are low income. 

(in reply to lostsoulskitten)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 12:33:45 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline 		I used to have those kind of dreams too but I conciously made the decision that the next time I had one I was going to be in the "revenge" role.
Man, they get bloody now as I hack the heads off of people who screwed me over!
In one I tied a guys leg and arm to a big tree and the other leg and arm to the back of a big pick-up truck I used to own.
"Built Ford Tough!" lol, that's what I said in the dream!
In one I prepared a huge tub of boiling water and started throwing people in and their skin came off and fell over the sides of the big round tub.
I actually look forward to having those dreams now!

(in reply to lostsoulskitten)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 12:35:21 PM   
lostsoulskitten


Posts: 45
Joined: 4/14/2007
Status: offline 		Umm I dont think that is going to help her nightmares.

Lostsoul.

(in reply to popeye1250)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 12:40:18 PM   
Rule


Posts: 10479
Joined: 12/5/2005
Status: offline 		Make a decision. Tell the universe that you are done with that, that you do not want that any more, those nightmares. Find something beautiful to look at. Feel confident. Feel at ease and comfortable. Resolve to also say in your dreams that you do not want these nightmares any more before you go to sleep. Resolve to be dreamless. Perhaps put on some soft, relaxing music as you sleep to distract your subconscious from your dreams.
 
Say a litany before you go to sleep: I am safe nothing can harm me, I will have pleasant dreams or none at all.
 
Perhaps your master can massage you before you go to sleep?
 
If that does not help after some time, then go find professional counseling.

(in reply to lostsoulskitten)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 12:43:36 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		A) Get therapy

B) Get a good night ritual including prayer for protection, and an affirmation to yourself that you are safe while you sleep and that all nightmares will pass through you and leave behind

C) have a wake up ritual (often something including a touchstone) to calm you down and let the feelings subside.  Remind yourself that this isn't who you are now, that you are in control and there is nothing to fear

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to lostsoulskitten)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 12:57:03 PM   
pahunkboy


Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		http://www.feminist.org/911/crisis.html --. 1/2 way down the list- is a toll free place in Austin., next to it a place in Killeen.
Texas Council on Family Violence


http://www.ndvh.org/  ---this is a national site-

just last month i made a small donation to the  shelter in Lewisburg PA.

Texas- is a state where it is hard to get free help.   We on the board are more then happy to help you. BUT- you need real life help on this problem.

If you want- you can phone me. I will send you my number.

A simple med- can do wonders.  You have nothing to lose.  Frankly without any type of help- the matter will put a strain on your current relationship.

I am NOT a psychiatrist. But I do know -[as do others here] when one can benifit thru modern medicine.

It is not your fault-- you were brutalized.  You have a RIGHT to your body. You have rights!

[I happen to be gay, it boggled my mind the violence on woman.]

anyhow. please follow up on this.

roger

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 1:02:52 PM   
makemeDaddy


Posts: 48
Joined: 1/26/2007
Status: offline 		Kitten i too have been abused and suffered tragedy in my life and have nightmares also.  i really don't wish to discuss them in open forum but if you wish to talk and hear my thoughts, advice etc, please feel free to message me.

(in reply to lostsoulskitten)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Repeated Nightmares - 4/18/2007 1:12:21 PM   
lostsoulskitten


Posts: 45
Joined: 4/14/2007
Status: offline 		I think I have the main cause found and we are working on it.  I did  a deep memory regression to find the source of the nightmares and it was a major violent abuse incident with her dad at a  very young age.

Implanted two security commands, ones to make her feel safe and secure, blanket and teddybear, both giving her feelings of safety and security.  Both are set to automatic, all she has to do is thinkn of a blanket or teddybear and she gets the feelings of safety. Now that we know the main root of them, should be a little easier.  Getting her away from her fucked up ass of a father earleir than we had planned in the beginning I think also is helping.  Now that she is out of that situation can start dealing with the rest. 

She did say they are slowly going away the longer she is with me.  It will take time, but she also is lucky she chose one who has a lot of expertese in dealing with the abuse and nightmares.  It should get better. Will update this later on when we can.

(in reply to pahunkboy)
Profile   Post #: 9
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