Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (Full Version)

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sexyone4you -> Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/12/2007 12:21:07 PM)

I wasn't always a pain slut - I became one.  I used to hit subspace easily with a simple spanking.  Then it came to a beating.  I can't hit subspace anymore from that.  I still enjoy the stimulation, but it's like sex without orgasm.  Good, but not great. 

Any ideas on where to go from here?  I have limits of breath, blood, and potty play, along with plenty some others.  Has anyone run into this?  What types of play did you try to help you get back to floating?



spanklette -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/12/2007 12:24:36 PM)

I tried not to be so goal oriented and I found that has helped when my sub space went AWOL. If I just enjoy the ride, and stop trying to find subspace...it finds me.



sexy2sum -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/12/2007 12:26:17 PM)

You're focused too deeply on the physical aspect of your play.  There is an energy within you that must be harnessed in order to reach the states that you are reffering to.  Incorporating meditation before and after our encounters has helped a lot. 



leakylee -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/12/2007 12:31:27 PM)

ohohoh,
I can totally identify. I wont bore anyone with the details of why, but I cant hit subspace with impact at all anymore. My pain tolerance in this area is gone. Bang! Boom! Dead!

At one time I floated almost instantly, safe words were impossible, and I could take a beating for hours. To say that sexual stimulation was apart of it, well that is an understatement. Now there aint a blessed thing.

I can attain subspace while engaging in various forms of edge play sexy, but it sounds like you arent that intrigued in those areas.

Thank you for starting this thread I will most definitely be keeping an eye on it.

lee



CuriousLord -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/12/2007 12:36:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyone4you
Any ideas on where to go from here?  I have limits of breath, blood, and potty play, along with plenty some others.  Has anyone run into this?  What types of play did you try to help you get back to floating?


What was it that got you there in the first place?  Physical pain, or some sort of concept behind it?  The physical reaction it caused?

So easy to become jaded, isn't it?  Grow used to one stimulation, one requires it to a more profound degree or in a more profound manner.  If it was a concept, though, some ideal you lost along the way while floating, perhaps you can reclaim that in realizing it.



myobedience -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/12/2007 1:28:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

What was it that got you there in the first place?  Physical pain, or some sort of concept behind it?  The physical reaction it caused?



I am definately NOT into attaining subspace and where or how one finds it, is beyond me.
I focus on my service, not on my reactions to it.
I have experienced, twice now, the ability to orgasm that I never thought possible.  He initiates it, carries me through it and I deliver it for his pleasure.  Today he called it a mind fucking orgasm.
I dont consider this subspace tho.
So my suggestion might be, if you are in it for the service, focus on that and not any physical reaction.
I really dont know much about masochists, unless they are also submissive masochists, then I call it, doing the pain for  him, thus focusing on his pleasure in recieving pain.  Maybe then? 



onestandingstill -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/12/2007 1:40:01 PM)

I find if I take a break from scening for about a month my tolerances go way down.
Maybe take a break for a month and the heavier play won't have to be so heavy for you to get to floating again once you start again.
LOL if not Midori just bloged the other day she cut a sub with paper cuts between her toes and then poured lemon juice in them.
That definately sounds ouchy.
suzanne



MsKatHouston -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/12/2007 2:14:13 PM)

quote:

Midori just bloged the other day she cut a sub with paper cuts between her toes and then poured lemon juice in them.


Oh my, that made me cringe.



sexyone4you -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/13/2007 12:48:52 AM)

Thank you, onestandingstill, but I tend to lump paper cuts with "bad" pain. Yikes!



sexyone4you -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/13/2007 12:52:10 AM)

I hear what you are saying, my obedience, but part of my service for him involves enjoying the pain & riding it into subspace.  I have taken shorter breaks, but that wouldn't please Him either if I desired to take a long break.  I am stuck between a rock & a whip & not seeing a solution here.  He and I do share the same limits with blood play.  

Has any other pain sluts run out of non-blood play to try? 



Nikolette -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/13/2007 1:04:50 AM)

sexyone4you:

Have you TRIED being open to a mild form of blood play?

My newest slave had blood play as a limit... We talked about it, he okayed trying it and we did it- and he loves it. He's had a LOT of limits turn into favorites in this manner. And he is the very nervous, limited type. Through working on the trust and bond and intimacy he was at least willing to TRY things and found some he really really enjoyed.

Just a thought.



sexyone4you -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/13/2007 1:08:52 AM)

Well, I have experienced the same things in terms of limits turning to favorites.  I haven't tried needles, but I have always had a big fear of them.  The Master I serve has a hard limit here also.  He considers it damage to His property. 

I can understand why this would work, and while I have both tattoos and piercings, there is just something about needle play that makes me queasy.



FukinTroll -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/13/2007 1:39:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyone4you

I wasn't always a pain slut - I became one.  I used to hit subspace easily with a simple spanking.  Then it came to a beating.  I can't hit subspace anymore from that.  I still enjoy the stimulation, but it's like sex without orgasm.  Good, but not great. 

Any ideas on where to go from here?  I have limits of breath, blood, and potty play, along with plenty some others.  Has anyone run into this?  What types of play did you try to help you get back to floating?


I think, perhaps, you lost touch with the moment. Many people do. Like with a spring/summer sprinkle, people cover up and duck for cover. How often do you see people stop, feel the rain on their faces, and relish the pleasure of it all? They are so far removed from the moment they cannot feel the pleasure of the simple things.
 
Slurp!



jayded34 -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/15/2007 9:58:35 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: onestandingstill

I find if I take a break from scening for about a month my tolerances go way down.
Maybe take a break for a month and the heavier play won't have to be so heavy for you to get to floating again once you start again.
LOL if not Midori just bloged the other day she cut a sub with paper cuts between her toes and then poured lemon juice in them.
That definately sounds ouchy.
suzanne



Yikes!



malvakai -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/15/2007 10:06:31 PM)

Try this, it works for me:

"I am not allowed to get to subspace." (or orgasm, or whatever)

It's all about creating the right resistance. Don't say "I can't get to ___" because you will make that come true.




aldompdx -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/15/2007 10:49:31 PM)

Subspace can be intentionally invoked, independent of external stimuli.

Subspace is a form of transcendence. Thruought history, there have been two basic approaches towards achieving the experience -- extroverted and introverted, or shamanic and meditative. BDSM is simply another path to creating a particular state of brain chemistry. Many consider that to be a spiritual quest.

If you find fulfillment in the experience, rather than in the process of pain, look within where the state is experienced.



santalia -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/15/2007 11:02:36 PM)

Greetings

i once had a hard time achieving subspace. i kept getting caught up in how whatever the Top was doing hurt or tickled and was not able to move on to float. He stopped and got on one knee before me (i was on the spanking bench) and began stroking my arms and talked in a soft soothing voice, telling me to close my eyes and envision a place that was somewhere i enjoyed being, such as the beach. He told me to hear the waves, feel the wind and water and keep ahold of this as he continued with the scene. It worked. It calmed my physical reactions and i was able to slip towards subspace. i didn't float very long or very deeply as it was near the close of the playspace we were in and the friend i'd driven down with and i would need to head home soon after.

Perhaps if you try something like this, you might be able to achieve subspace again?

Well wishes

-santalia{JR}t



sexyone4you -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/16/2007 2:34:47 AM)

Thank you for all of your suggestions.  I have lots to try over the next few sessions. 



UntamedStar -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/16/2007 2:47:52 AM)

*Looks forward to finding 'subspace'..one day*[8|]



ExSteelAgain -> RE: Hitting subspace - I can't get there anymore! (4/16/2007 5:15:07 AM)

I’m going to point out the obvious here. You are reaching a pain tolerance. I suppose you are going to talk with your Dom about not being able to reach subspace and are only throwing it out here for ideas. (Exactly what subspace is can be debated, but I have a heavy scientific background and have researched the subject because I have an interest being a Dom, obviously. The following explanation works for me until I’m shown a better one.)

You have to let the catecholamines build enough to produce a sympathetic nervous system fight of flight reaction and the resulting vagal response (spacing) after your body can’t withstand the continued sympathetic stimulation. It is common for submissives to reach a tolerance for pain with a certain activity and to need more or a longer endured pain. There have been more than a few posts of subs explaining how their tolerance grew and they required more.

If you both love flogging/spanking and want to stick with those, I would suggest a longer buildup with crescendo type rhythms. You build the endorphins higher and higher until you finally reach the desired level. The other option is to introduce “harder” toys that elicit more or a response. In any case, I hope you two find your solution because it really is something you have to work on together.



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