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Druzzil -> RE: Sub girls with vanilla guys (4/10/2007 8:24:58 PM)
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I must say in most cases this problem is because of lack of discusion between partners
if I go out to a pub and pick up a girl, I will not tie her up and spank her and call all my friend to come and abuse her..why not..some slavegirls says, because by most women being sub/slave is not the norm is our society, most men and women like to do the "normal" things = vanilla. even if she like to serve does not mean she is total slave and men can do whatever he want with her, it is rare. only way he will know what you REALLY desire and seeks in a man is by telling him, he can NOT read your mind.
girls seems often to say oposite of what she really want and he will in best case know about it AFTER she leave the guy.
I am quite sure lots of those vanilla men would enjoy a sub girl and can dom her if she give him time to adept and learn how she works. guys are teached from we are young to treat girls nice, slap her face and yell at her stupid bitch and give her 100 strokes with a cane is not what most people see a good way to treat a girl
so first she must get him used to idea of spanking for her is pleasure, tell him this is better than give me an orgams that you so desperat try to give me every time we have sex.
I see Master/slave role almost the same, only oppsite desires in life. if you think about it, the Master please her slave by let her serve him and by spank her ect. if he dont spank her, she will not be happy and leave him to find that master she seeks to fulfill her needs, same as Dom seeks slaves to please and serve him
in our society more people will think Master is more pleased when he force his slave to suck his cock for hour or spank her butt 100 strokes, but in fact both enjoy and get pleased equaly much, just diffrent type of pleasure.
I have been a vanilla guy. (still are sometimes) took me many years until I had oportunity to explore and understand what I was doing. I have study psycoligy, there is no diffrence in men and women, about 50% is born Dom and other 50% is Sub, but when we grow up we are thought it is more ok for men to be Dom and women should be Sub. I know most of you say this is not true, most coupke dont live as Master/slave..it is true, most dom/sub is very little one way or the other way, you can hardly even tell what she/he is, only this few % of extreme will be a "true" Master or slave. in a scale 1-20, 1 is slave and 20 is master ou will have like 90% around 8-12 and only like 0.0001% is 1 or 20
for some reason it is always wrong on guys when he is too kind, never wrong on guys that are to rough
if a sub man date a dom girl, she try to addept to me more sub and he try to be more dom, that is what we told is the normal, "show her you are a man" "dont be a pussy" ect..same as you desribe both parts in realationship will not be happy for long time and seek new partner, but will end up in same sitation over and over and not know why it never works.
Must know yourself before you can require someone else to know you and do exacly what you want and need. you can lie to other people as much as you like but is still will be wrong as long as you lie to yourself.
Even if it is more accepted for a man to be in command it is very tabu for men to talk about it, if a man says he like to spank and have men over to bang his GF, most people around him will think he is evil and a bad man. that is why it is so hard to find Doms, seen girls that want to be raped and tortured and even more extreme things like nailed on a wall ect , a man cant really say on first date," Hi I am Mike i want to rape and torture you for several hours, do you wanna follow me home tonight".
give him time and talk about it, by own experince it is always more accepted if sub says what she like
tell him it is ok to slap my face, i like when you grab my hair and force me down ect and I am sure most men will say what he likes if he into Dom, I am sure he will try and atleast be less vanilla then before, maybe never be that superDom you wish him to be, atleast both tried.
I have read the BDSM world has major sortage of Dom's, how come everywhere I look there is like 50 male doms per 1 female sub ( according to internet dateing)
I have been looking for sub girl for many years on internet but never found a serius girl willing to met in reallife.most of em after a few mails say this was not looking for I am not a slave, I dont like being spanked or told what to do, just an fantasi I have had for many years.
I think is far more "fake" subs than "fake" Doms, specialy by females subs.
create an account, send a few mails and then never sign in again or even worse
be online 24/7 but never replay to one singel mail she get.
/Druzzil
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