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Sheepish confession - 4/8/2007 11:08:04 PM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		We played today. Whee fun! I thoroughly enjoyed all but a few brief minutes of it.

Let me set this up for you. I'm in a leather single sleeve - my arms are behind my back, slid into a leather sleeve, tightened down and secured around my shoulders. My hair was down but that was my fault, as I didn't get a clip when setting things up. I chose instead to check my e-mail. Hmmmm...bad priority maybe.

I knelt and two ingenious clamps were placed on my nipples, behind my piercings. Two slender pieces of wood (possibly bamboo) which are connected with plastic end-ie thingies on the ends. You can separate them and close them. Also sliding free on the pieces of wood are two rubber gaskets. Slide the gaskets to the outside, separate the pieces of wood, insert nipple, close pieces of wood. Slide gaskets closer to nipple as girl winces and gasps. Repeat with the other nipple.

Sir sat back and the couch and I had to lean forward. There is now, of course, some difficulty. I have two pieces of wood perpendicular to my body on each nipple. I am either banging these fucker..erm, devices against his legs, or the couch, or both. When I brightly asked if I could get help, he laughed and said no.

So I bent my head to the task at hand, so to speak, and gave it my attention. I wouldn't say my best attention, as my ass was red and welted and I'd just jabbed it with the #*(&$#ing 4" stillettos I was wearing (Daddy's suggestion!), I was losing circulation in my hands, and Daddy kept wiggling his #$*ing legs - and bumping the stupid sticks.

Ok so I got my hair pulled and got all hot and sweaty and made Daddy happy, and then I had to empty my mouth (gagged and threw up and couldn't swallow). And Daddy was concerned and he got up too, so now I'm facing an empty couch. Then he started to do something and...this is where you have to watch carefully now...it's about 10 minutes later?...I flip my hair over my shoulder

Me: OAAWHHHURRGGGHH!
Daddy: What part hurts? (Very concerned - he's stopped hurting me at this point and is standing behind me.)
Me: My nipple. OW FUCK TAKE IT OFF NOW! (I'm so glad he worked out that I meant the clamp)
Daddy: (trying to stifle laughter) OMG are you ok?

Now, let's be fair. If I had been prepared and had a hair clip, it would not have caught the damned sticky thing. But it is also true I could have knocked it into the couch or something else (I'm rather a klutz). But that fucker HURT!

However, I also screamed, cursed, AND (to make it all worse) ordered Daddy to take it off...and do it NOW.

I'm not in trouble. Sir understood. It was not pain he intended to cause. He still thinks it's funny. But I'm rather sheepish about the inappropriateness of my outburst.

Though he did point out...I don't always have to use my safeword!!

~Elorin

I welcome comments, anecdotes from subs or Doms of sheepish confessions, and friendly ribbing from the peanut gallery.
~E
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 12:47:08 AM   
boundtolove


Posts: 2
Joined: 4/2/2007
Status: offline 		Oh dear, *giggle* sometimes the best laid plans etc etc... Well I'm sure you'll know better next time, mind you that nipple clamp you described sounded like a great deal of fun.. hmmm




_____________________________

...I am a princess on the way to my throne, destined to serve.

(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 4:34:01 AM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		I certainly had fun...and the clamps are fun and great for many uses. But I am also working out an appropriate acknowledgement/apology to Daddy to let him know that I recognize what I did and feel bad about it. ~LOL~

Oh, here's a place to buy the clamps:

http://prysmcreations.com/bamboo_clamp_pairs.html

~E

(in reply to boundtolove)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 6:49:53 AM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		Aren't you taking control by deciding that an authentic, in the moment reaction was wrong when he's already told you that to him it wasn't wrong? If he doesn't think you did anything wrong, then how come you are being submissive when you tell him in effect that his thinking is incorrect, that he should feel you spoke unsubmissively? By deciding that he needs an apology after he's already told you that he doesn't, you are refusing to accept his decision. Instead of accepting his decision of what submission look like, you are substituting your own.

This is, btw, one of the hardest hurdles a sub ever has to deal with. We have these images in our heads of what submission should look like and the images are so strong that they can blind you to what the dominant wants.

The same as when you decide not to bother him with something for fear he'll be disappointed in you instead of believing him when he says he'll be there for you.

And those clamps look nasty!


(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 6:55:20 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		Checking the PC instead of doing what you should be doing or staying focused on your service is sadly something many have trouble with.  Sometimes the results like yours are funny afterward, sometimes realizing you aren't the priority to them that they think you are just hurts.

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 7:09:46 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Why was it inappropriate?  It was an immediate, automatic reaction.  He still didn't have to DO anything about it.  Does he have a rule and has spent time training you on how to respond in such situations such that would make the response inappropriate?

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 9:11:03 AM   
BRNaughtyAngel


Posts: 1821
Status: offline 		Nevermind...... I need to learn to read.

< Message edited by BRNaughtyAngel -- 4/9/2007 9:12:04 AM >

(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 9:20:18 AM   
ONEDEMANDINGMSTR


Posts: 47
Joined: 8/28/2006
Status: offline 		LOVE IT!!!!!!!!  Two people having fun!!  I know the situation was painful.....but at the same time , if two people, so deeply involved with one another, can't find humor and enjoyment in obviously absurd circumstances..............what the Heck????
If the Master ain't mad, and the subbie sees the humor.......Or even if she doesn't..I think it's great!!!!

"If it isn't fun/enjoyable..................DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!

(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 9:48:01 AM   
spanklette


Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline 		We had kind of the same situation, and I said..."Get these things off of me like five minutes ago". He, of course, laughed and took them off. That's our dynamic. There wasn't an apology necessary on either side. He didn't see that I was past my limit on that particular device and I was less than submissive when letting Him know. It's not normality, but it is life.
 
If he says you don't need to apologize, then don't.

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 10:07:20 AM   
mbes


Posts: 465
Joined: 12/14/2006
Status: offline 		Heh. Mine would expect exactly that reaction, I think, to accidental pain. And he'd probably wonder what was wrong with me if he didn't get it. :D
If he isn't concerned with your reaction, I can't imagine a reason to spend time doing anything but laughing about it. :) No matter how well we plan, life happens!

(in reply to spanklette)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 10:17:09 AM   
Devilslilsister


Posts: 1262
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline 		i've had a few situations like that.  Feel sheepish about the hair, but not the reaction.  Its normal i think.  Atleast it is at times for me.  They generally know if its meant in disrespect or not.  If it makes you feel any better, yesterday i told Master i hated him, the world was filled with jerks, everyone was a bastard and people should learn to jump of bridges ALOT more often.  And thats all i can remember off the top of my head.  i think i told him he was a big evil meanie too.  And of course, its ALL his fault.  Everything is HIS damn fault.  At some point yesterday, i think i also notified him that Friday night i had a very stronge urge to literally kick him out of bed while he was sleeping.. or was it to kick him repeatedly until he fell out of bed?  God knows, i was abit wrapped up with something.  Ah, yeah and i demanded as well.  i told him he BETTER do X - RIGHT NOW.  Think i said that half a million times.  ::smiles:: and i remember once saying "what...... whatcha gonna do??  Spank me??  GO AHEAD"  (yet i managed to not be disrespectful if you can understand that)

He just laughed.  i was frustrated and he was absolutely amused by it.  He even patrionized me.  Do i feel sheepish about my out burst?  Nah not at all.  What i do  feel sheepish about was some how managing to lose my inner control.  He didnt mind, he seemed to enjoy my loss of control and really thats all that matters.  How do THEY feel about it?


_____________________________

My ability to cope with BS is at an all time low - me

i may look like i'm doing nothing, but i'm very busy at a cellular level

(in reply to spanklette)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 10:39:01 AM   
SLAVEBOY32


Posts: 122
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline 		Sounds like an awesome relationship,  you got lost by the intensity of the pain, which has happend for me, and because of this your choice of wording was maybe not the best. It happens, who cares, i mean you saw the fault,  you blame yourself, you know how it could have been prevented, and you are striving to be the best you can be. Is anyone ever perfect all the time? I am VERY dissapointed in myself if i don't please a Domme, for whatever the reason, even when she tells me it is OK and she understands,  etc. etc. i still feel guilty so i sympathize with you there.   Don't beat yourself up over it. Your partner put your needs first before some rules. He realized you were in trouble,  and right away took care of you. He isn't punishing you for it, or reminding you of it, or holding it over your head, (metaphoric of course lol) . He probably already knows you are really sorry and that is all he needs. He could have been an ass and not reacted as quickly since you responded inappropriatly, (butchered that spelling i suspect) but he put your needs first. I personally, would feel a lil closer, grateful, and remember you can't be perfect every time, whether it was lack of preperation or whatever, all you can do is strive to do better next time, but you'll never get it right every single time.
    Not to ramble, but reading this post reminds me of something that happend to me once during a scene. I wont go into details, but something pretty intense was going on, and in a matter of one second, something happend to me without warning that by all rights would have ended the scene for most, and completely broke the mood. She knew me so well, and was so freggin hot, she barely skipped  a beat, but did stop for a half second and completely out of character, reverted back to a concerned voice and goes, "you OK?" i'm stunned by what happend, and stunned by how fast she came out of character to see if im OK, but i was OK, and all i could do was go, "yup im still good" she never said another word, just BAM right back into charcter, neither one of us had cooled off, she picked right back up with the same intensity and i was SO turned on my that i instantly felt so close to her.

(in reply to mbes)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/9/2007 7:02:07 PM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		Celeste: I'm not taking control, I'm taking responsibility. Sir has not said my reaction was ok, not ok, or anything. We haven't discussed it at length. I did, however, do three things that as his sub he has asked me not to do - I swore at him, I raised my voice at him, and I ordered him to do something. Since these values are already established in our relationship, by taking responsibility and telling him that I recognized that I did them, I am giving Sir the knowledge that I realized what happened. Is it ok that it happened? Yeah, probly, since Sir giggled. Will I be punished? Nah, probly not. Was my reaction understandable - indubitably. Had Sir actually said "there is no need to apologize" I would not be trying to form an apology, I would simply be trying to form a way of saying "I did this, and now I recognize that it went against X, Y,
Z" and asking for help and his opinion.

SimplyMichael
I asked Sir permission to check something on the PC, and he granted it. I could easily have done other things but was waiting on an e-mail, and he knew it, so he gave me the 3 minutes while finished putting the bench together. Next time, I won't make that choice. ~LOL~ Sir did not think he wasn't a priority, and he knew why I asked for time with the PC.

LuckyAlbatross:
It was inappropriate because, as I said above, I am not supposed to raise my voice to Sir, swear at Sir, or order him to do things, per his prior instruction.

spanklette:
Sir took them off, and our dynamic is what it is. Had he not wanted to, he'd have laughed, untangled my hair, and they'd have stayed on - or I would have used my safeword. I accept that. I'm awfully glad he took them off though. ~LOL~ An apology isn't necessary - however it is my personality and a conscious effort to let him know that I am trying to be submissive.

Devilslilsister
Sir and I are very honest with one another. I've said I've hated him before, and always regretted it b/c it hurts him deeply. Calling him a bastard, asshole, evil sadist or anything else doesn't hurt him, it makes him grin. Telling him how I wanted to react to him always makes him laugh - I volunteer the information he needs to torture me needlessly. ~laughs~ However, it isn't just how he feels that matters. How I feel matters also. I'm not sorry for losing control - in fact, that's the goal of our relationship, that I give control to him, especially during scenes. He wants my honest, unfettered reactions, not my controlled reactions. I'm sorry that I swore at him and raised my voice to him. Raising my voice and swearing is actually fine, but directing it to him isn't, and that is the source of my regret. All I expect out of apologizing is a discussion between he and I about what happened.

I'm actually amused by the reactions here. I am not beating myself up about this, I do not feel horrible, I don't feel really guilty. I do, however, recognize that in my oh shit ow ow ow ow kinda moment, I crossed some lines. I'm just willing to own up to them whether he's upset about them or not.

Mostly, 99%, it was just funny as hell to me that had I gotten a hair clip before we played, none of it would have happened. Ya get what you earn!
~E





(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/10/2007 2:16:04 AM   
Passion357


Posts: 481
Joined: 8/7/2005
Status: offline 		Well this has sure made me think.

I can only equate to having been hogged tied and trying to flip my hair and totally screwing something up while Master had stepped across the room to adjust the camera and I started laughing (well giggling) which made him laugh  and he looked up to see the mess I made of my face...and my hair...any pain and he'd adjust if he saw fit...

As far as name calling well I have called him everything including ..well..n/m LOL
But I haven't told him I hate him. I doubt I will because I have stong feeling about hate.

I do have a question, though, if it's not too off base from the OP?,
 To those of you that have:
Why would you/have you ever told your Sir you hate him?

Like what is an example of that?

I am sure I have an equasion...WEG...as there was a time I got in Masters face!...But he was yelling at me from across the room and said the worst word imaginable to me...causing me to slam my candle drawer, break a 30 year old candle (if not older) and go into near rage...not that it's an excuse...

P.S. the candle sits on display in the Den to this day...

(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/10/2007 5:11:11 AM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Passion357
As far as name calling well I have called him everything including ..well..n/m LOL
But I haven't told him I hate him. I doubt I will because I have stong feeling about hate.

For one memorable scene, at a party with about 150 people there, I spent close to an hour screaming "fuck fuck fuck fuck you suck you suck you suck fuck fuck fuck" as red hot pokers were touched all along my pubic area. ~s~ Called Sir some names from time to time, oh yeah, but most of the time it isn't quite like my situation above - and they tend to make him laugh anyway.

quote:

I do have a question, though, if it's not too off base from the OP?,
 To those of you that have:
Why would you/have you ever told your Sir you hate him?

I told Sir that I hated him for reasons completely unrelated to D/s, and during a very very VERY big fight in which we had both lost control. There was a lot of nastiness and name calling all the way around. The deep level truth is I told him that I hated him because what I wanted most was to be wrapped in his arms and sobbing, and instead we were screaming at one another and I felt alone, rejected, and totally out of control.

I think that question would actually make a good thread of  it's own, if you wanted to start one.
~E

(in reply to Passion357)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/10/2007 5:29:24 AM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Checking the PC instead of doing what you should be doing or staying focused on your service is sadly something many have trouble with.  Sometimes the results like yours are funny afterward, sometimes realizing you aren't the priority to them that they think you are just hurts.


But why take it so seriously?  She is more upset with her own outburst than the fact he disappeared, correct?


_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: Sheepish confession - 4/10/2007 8:46:44 AM   
longtimemuse


Posts: 15
Joined: 10/20/2006
Status: offline 		LMAO...I'm still chuckling thinking about your wonderfully discriptive experience.

Yes, its your fault that you forgot the hairclip. Been there...done that. But its also great that you are comfortable enough with each other that honest responses are what come out...

If he told you to get the clip before hand or it was part of an expected ritual..then I could see him being dissapointed in your service or you being disappointed in yourself (which is what I struggle with more often than anything else, not living up to the high standards I set for my own self) But, if it was just an incidental that neither one of you thought  of  then  consider it a lesson learned in prepratory skills.

As ar as yelling and telling your Master what to do.....that depends entirely on your type of relationship.
I can only go on my own experiences...my Master would probably make a joke of the entire thing and maybe swat my ass a few times in mock punishment. He would only be upset if I was consiously ordering him   around or being disrespectful intentionally, then things would get serious.

It sounds as if your Master is of a similar  mindset, from your narrative.


I figure its kinda like stubbing your toe ...when its unexpected like that...you might tend to hop around yelling obsenities for a few seconds before the brain kicks in....opps...dummy... you got to busy to put on your shoes. Just my two cents

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/10/2007 5:43:23 PM   
Synocense


Posts: 255
Joined: 8/8/2004
Status: offline 		"LMAO...I'm still chuckling thinking about your wonderfully discriptive experience."

......and me thinks that is what the post is really about, sharing an experience. Nothing more, nothing less.

_____________________________

Before you speak, ask yourself..
Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?
Does it improve upon the silence?

(in reply to longtimemuse)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Sheepish confession - 4/13/2007 6:17:18 AM   
bondageneko


Posts: 3
Joined: 4/11/2007
Status: offline 		 This is a delightful area of subject matter that Master and this one refer to as BDSm bloobers...life happens..shit happens..and as said  the best laid plans....take a second  to look at the comedic factor..and laugh  this  world is far too short on laughter as it is! Find it best to  be able to laugh at ones own slight faux pas.
 
  Agree that she feels the need to make ammends  as would this one..seems  they do have a great dynamic going..and a keen understanding of one another..who could ask for more?
 
  This one has had many bloopers..of which Master and she still gets a great giggle over even a year later LOL.. these are the things when W/we are in rocking chairs at the old pervs home  that W/we can sit back and  relate to other old pervs LMAO..  this one  on a padded cushion at His wheelchair..Him barely able to lift His cane..still will look on in love and adoration..with respect and heart felt devotion..it is memories  that make life precious...cherish them all 

(in reply to Synocense)
Profile   Post #: 19
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