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Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 2:42:21 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline 		Domestic service / servitude is different for many.

It is a thinking person's relationship as it is the mindset that is active to display the heirachy at work.

Either discussion or decree both are arrived in a consenting manner by which the submissive has previously negotiated or resolved to let service enter such agreements.

My perception is that Decree encompasses the freewill previously given to all subcatigories that a relationship may charter into.

Many feel the need to challenge at every point where others might feel the need to accept a blanket servitude where the only negotiations are done at the very begining.

The terminology of domestic to Me can entail cooking and food prep, bathing..many Dominants enjoy being bathed, dried and massaged, chauffered about, running errands, web services and maintenance, cleaning and maintenance of household nature to name a few.

I would be interested in reading how wide and varied those in service or being service have examples of such domestic service.

Respectfully submitted for consideration.

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©
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RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 12:05:14 PM   
timorous


Posts: 60
Joined: 4/7/2005
Status: offline 		I'm not sure what there is to discuss about it really. If you're a good slave you'll do everthing you can for your Master.

Mine says that my main function in life is to make his better. I have no argument with that at all.

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
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RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 12:12:46 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Domestic service to me simply means "in/for the home."

So anything from putting up and taking down holiday decorations, to paying property taxes and anything in between.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 12:52:25 PM   
bellanotte


Posts: 125
Joined: 4/27/2006
From: Tornado Alley, USA
Status: offline 		I don't identify personally with the label "domestic submissive/slave" as to many I've found that rather than your broader definition, it's often defined in a more narrow manner. For me it is just a part of who I am and of my submission in general that I am drawn to certain things and not to others... for example, to cooking and massage but not to gardening or chaffeuring. Does this mean that I wouldn't do those things that I don't particularly like though? Nahh *smiles*..... just that I don't prefer them.

Everything you mentioned to me can fall under a person's service... it comes down to the individual relationship. Anything from the Japanese tea service to composting may be what a Dominant wants and he may find equal beauty in the submissive doing both; the process is, to me, more important than the act itself.

It's a topic that seems self-explanatory on the one hand but can be deceptively complex on the other *soft smile.*

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 12:53:55 PM   
mp072004


Posts: 381
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline 		Typically domestic service means housework. I clearly distinguish "body service" like being bathed or massaged from "domestic service," like washing dishes or vacuuming. I'm less careful about distinguishing waitservice, fetching and carrying or serving at table, from housework, though I do regard them as different activities. Then there's errand running, cooking, correspondence and schedule managing, and chauffeuring, things I don't think hard about because I don't currently care to engage a servant for those tasks. In my experience, many submissive people will provide service as an adjunct or secondary activity to play, romance, leaning, or sex, but a few, "service submissives," enjoy providing service chiefly, and happily enter relationships centered on or limited to that. Both approaches are valid, but I confess, the latter has a special place in my mind. It's very sweet when someone expresses happiness and satisfaction in response to making my life easier.

Monica

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
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RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 1:00:07 PM   
topcat


Posts: 1675
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Tidewater, VA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

Domestic service / servitude is different for many.

It is a thinking person's relationship as it is the mindset that is active to display the heirachy at work.

Either discussion or decree both are arrived in a consenting manner by which the submissive has previously negotiated or resolved to let service enter such agreements.

My perception is that Decree encompasses the freewill previously given to all subcatigories that a relationship may charter into.

Many feel the need to challenge at every point where others might feel the need to accept a blanket servitude where the only negotiations are done at the very begining.

The terminology of domestic to Me can entail cooking and food prep, bathing..many Dominants enjoy being bathed, dried and massaged, chauffered about, running errands, web services and maintenance, cleaning and maintenance of household nature to name a few.

I would be interested in reading how wide and varied those in service or being service have examples of such domestic service.

Respectfully submitted for consideration.

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

he would have had 2,100 feet, the NTSB said. Instead, the pilot was flying closer Republicans are all calling for change, he's desperately clinging to his stay the "President Bush has never had a plan to win in Iraq, and now that Democrats and Service took the lives of five heroes," U.S. Forest Service Chaplain Steve Seltzner but he did not disclose a motive and would not say what led investigators to Oyler

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(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
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RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 1:08:40 PM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline 		I am not quite sure what the OP is getting at. For people in a power exchange relationship outside of just sexual/kink area domestic service on some level is just part of life as what you describe is pretty much life.

I do think you might be getting into a technical debate when you write “Many feel the need to challenge at every point where others might feel the need to accept a blanket servitude where the only negotiations are done at the very begining.” In terms of how people live their power relationship when it is not in the total to near total life part. Most people want consistency and reality. For some that the power exchange is more fluid in this area of their life the debate and challenge might not be about wanting to do it but having the time to do it.

As a person who identifies as a slave I accept all domestic and service duties my Master puts on me but it does have to have a realistic aspect to it. As much as one would love to truly devote all twenty-four hours to Master, there is also real life like work and other things as well as things keep a submissive mentally healthy like having contact with friends and family and time to relax instead of always doing something that has to be factored in when designing responsibilities in the domestic service/chores area in order to have things run smoothly.



_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to bellanotte)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 1:11:46 PM   
HerEmeraldEyes


Posts: 51
Joined: 7/26/2006
From: Joliet, IL
Status: offline 		I usually use the phrase domestic service.  But I usually define it so there are no miscommunications.  I concider domestic service to be seperate from S&M play.  It's all the little things that I need done to alleviate my personal stress.  My domestic slave for me is a maid, butler, valet, chauffeur, bath operator, masseur, nanny, and even companion when I am lonely.   But usually "domestic service" is only part of the duties I expect from a slave.

Miss Emerald


_____________________________

Unknown Author "Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect. It means you have decided to look beyond the imperfections."

(in reply to topcat)
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RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 2:12:28 PM   
SCDommie


Posts: 176
Joined: 1/24/2007
Status: offline 		Domestic Servitude plays an important factor in my roll as a Domme. 
It begins with simple tasks such as making your bed each day, keeping your house clean, cooking,  and etc.   In my opinion, it is important to build a sub/slave's self-esteem as well as be a presentable place for the Dom/me to entertain guests.

SCD

(in reply to HerEmeraldEyes)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 3:21:06 PM   
Archer


Posts: 3207
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		Pick up an Emily Post prior to the 1950's and the list of various domestic service possitions in a large house are listed as well as many of their specific duties.
Butler
Housekeeper
Valet
Dressing Maid
Footman
Upstairs maid
Downstairs maid
Laundress
Cook
Personal Secretary
Chauffeur
Usefull man
Gardener
Nanny
There are a few more but  can't recall them at the moment.

(in reply to SCDommie)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 3:37:48 PM   
losttreasure


Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline 		Repost on service:

...regarding the submissive nature and the need to serve, and I sometimes get the impression that dominants feel this is true and given for all submissives, or at least should be.  It seems there is never a lack of commentary by dominants about the dismal understanding of submissives with regard to service.

Typically musings such as these are followed by discussion of the different types of submissives and the services they perform... the “bedroom sub”, the “domestic service sub”, etc.  And, it’s usually responded to with reminders that not all submissives are service submissives, which predictably leads to some kind of conversation mentioning the difference between subs who only want play and those who seek a 24/7 lifestyle.

At any rate, it seems that the concept of service usually gets stuck around the idea that it relates only to performing duties that provide for (or having responsibilities that are related to) either the comfort or pleasure of a dominant.

While both of these types of service have their appeal to me, I would not say that as a part of my nature that I desire or crave either.  Now, I will admit that I derive pleasure from being pleasing... and if performing domestic chores results in pleasing Fhky, then it is a source of happiness for me.  In the same vein and even more obviously, if in sexual service I can bring pleasure to him, again I am pleased.

But at my core, there isn’t a part of me that longs to provide these services.  I am not driven to my knees with need to do so.  Were that the case, there are an infinite number of opportunities to provide service in this world without having to relinquish my power to another... and if I were aroused simply by the act of serving, I could take those opportunities and walk through life in a state of perpetual sexual bliss without ever having to involve another individual in my private affairs.

That being said, in so much as these are sources of happiness for me and I do wish to be happy in my life, then yes, one could say that I desire and crave these types of service... but they aren’t the main type of service that “floats my boat”.

Beyond these common ideas of service there is one type that may be universally understood, but I believe is often forgotten or at least not spoken of frequently. The service that I’m referring to is the kind of service that one thinks about a Knight giving his king... it is fealty.  The desire to be in the presence of someone who embodies the essence of all that you hold dear in humanity.  To be on bended knee (or knees) pledging all that you are in adoration.  If you look up “fealty” in a thesaurus, you get the synonyms of allegiance, adherence, ardor, constancy, dedication, deference, devotion, duty, faithfulness, fidelity, homage, honor, loyalty, obedience, obligation, and piety.  To me, those words describe the ultimate service... the ultimate submission... the ultimate turn-on.

You know you've been here too long when you're able to recycle your responses to just about every thread. 


_____________________________

Just because it isn't "all about me", doesn't make it "all about you".

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/19/2007 5:01:36 PM   
czarlipet


Posts: 30
Joined: 2/17/2007
Status: offline 		I am a service submissive.
 
I have been a member of a Leather House and can describe the kind of service I provided then. There was no sex between me an the other members of the House. While sex and the "play scene" can be service I have never yet given any kind of sexual service to anyone.
 While a member of my former House I contributed a small amount of money to the House when funds were low for all. I cleaned. I organized. I did not cook as the Lady of the House was something akin to a gourmet chef. I gave the Lord and other House Members massages which dualling worked toward my education in the field of massage therapy. I babysat and acted as a mentor to those younger or newer to the lifestyle within the House. At lifestyle events I followed the lead of the Lady of the house and acted as a role model to the other submissives in the house. I acted as a maid, a driver, babysitter, friend, advisor. I also allowed the Lord of our House certain rights over me. He was my Protector and Mentor. I gave him the right to choose who I might play with, date, and even who I might accept as Master. Part of my service was submitting to his will in areas of my life that I could easily have taken care of myself but had negotiated into his care. I was also used a couple of times as a "Demo Dummy" during training sessions.
 
I am very active in my community. I do volunteer work at a local club where I act as cashieer and I help with clean-up and welcoming those who are new. I also have a group that I have started with a close dominant friend which is geared toward educating those who are new and curious about the lifestyle. We meet weekly and have discussions, field trips, demos, and training. This is how I serve my community.
 
In my personal life.. I can often be found cleaning and organizing my friends homes. I make sure my friends eat when they should and have someone to talk to when they need it. I am currently teaching myself that I need to give service to myself also. I need to be able to take care of myself so that should the need arise when I am with another I can take care of us both. I need to see to my own needs, desires, and wants until such time as there is another to put give those responsabilities to.
 
Yes, what I do is done by lots of other people who just do it. For me it is service. It is how I submitt and give service to others. The difference in what I do and what others do is a point of perspective. I think of it as service and others don't. I don't use the word domestic in my service because I don't feel the need to identify all the kinds of service that I provide. I give  service and that is all I need to do for myself.
 
This is my service, I cannot speak of how it is for others.
 
Czarli 

(in reply to losttreasure)
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RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/21/2007 4:24:04 PM   
SusanofO


Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline 		Housework (cleaning, mostly, but also laundry, ironing and things like grocery shopping). Cooking and entertainment plannjng and execution (even though I also do these because I think it's fun). What someone else said is right, I think - a lot of it, is stuff I'd be doung for myself anyway - but of course I suppose a few things that the Dominant specifically liked or needed done might also be thrown into the mix (bathing, etc.).

I'd consider it "negotiable" if it got ot be a matter of not having enough time to do things  at the level of quality the Dominan seemed to expect, (because there was really just too much for one person to do), or things that I found personally objectionable for some other reason (very heavy-lifting involved in some kinds of yardwork and snow-shovelling, for example). Most housework I don't mind doing at all, anyway.

- Susan    

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/21/2007 4:25:52 PM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to czarlipet)
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RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/22/2007 12:35:15 AM   
MasterNdorei


Posts: 658
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline 		This is how the categories are determined in Master's house:

As a domestic, i clean, do the laundry, manage the yards, handle all aspects of cooking, menu planning, and managing the kitchen. i run errands, shop for the household, and keep records that partain to the house (such as when to feed the houseplants and order a new water filter, to handling rebates, and organizing warrantees).

It is being His pleasure slave that allows me the honor of bathing Him, fetching His robe and towels from the dryer so they are toasty warm, providing Him with a foot soak and and massage when He arrives home from work, or a body massage later in the evening. Anything that pampers Him, serving Him sexually, or providing for any other of His physical desires falls under this category.

How i serve Master emotionally falls under the category of being a companion slave.

What seperates my service in all these areas from when i was vanilla is the focus and intent in which i do them, that i maintain an attitude that is pleasing to Him, and that i always perform to the best of my ability. i am more focused on quality of service these days, and less focused on quantity.

A special thank you to losttrasure for sharing the word fealty and it's meaning. i've not heard of it before, and it certainly applies to my life.

Be Well~*
Master's dorei


(in reply to SusanofO)
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RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/22/2007 4:42:51 AM   
losttreasure


Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterNdorei

...A special thank you to losttrasure for sharing the word fealty and it's meaning. i've not heard of it before, and it certainly applies to my life.


You are very welcome. 

I share your summation in that focus and intent are what differentiates my service to FirmHandKY from any other.  Very well said.


_____________________________

Just because it isn't "all about me", doesn't make it "all about you".

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Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/22/2007 4:57:56 AM   
StellaByStarlite


Posts: 790
Joined: 2/10/2007
Status: offline 		Hello. =)
 
There's a certain satisfaction that I get from service that isn't entirely based on pleasing my owner. Don't get me wrong, pleasing him is top priority, but I'm service-oriented by nature so our dynamic is arranged to benefit the both of us.
 
As far as housework is concerned, I'm a stay-at-home mother, so that's pretty much already on my job list, owned or not. Maybe the difference is mindset? I dunno. I don't particularly care for housework in general, but when my owner delegates the responsibility to me as a duty to him, it changes my perception a lot.
 
My owner tweaks the relationship to make the most out of what I enjoy doing, I'm not going to lie. He'd be perfectly content if I was more passive as a slave. but as soon as he discovered that I thrived on being kept busy with service, he went with it. And why not? I'm like Thomas the Tank Engine.. I love feeling like a useful little engine. =)
 
We're both new to this, so what he requires and desires of me as a slave might change in time. But right now, proactive service is working for the both of us very well. He's the perfect boss. And a natural at delegating authority.
 
Heck, I love service so much that watching " The Devil Wears Prada" sends me into spirals of longing. Seriously. Meryl Streep's character, ohmygosh. Tell me she wouldn't make a great Domme. ;)
 
Cheers,
Stella
 

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/22/2007 5:30:40 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: losttreasure

Repost on service:
You know you've been here too long when you're able to recycle your responses to just about every thread. 



While I thank you for your repsot which was over 2 years ago...has nothing evolved in your way of thinking or application on the subject in discussion?

No new perception is 2 years?

Ross
©º°¨¨°º©

(in reply to losttreasure)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/22/2007 7:31:05 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: losttreasure
You know you've been here too long when you're able to recycle your responses to just about every thread. 

Gosh I hope not!

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to losttreasure)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/22/2007 7:56:09 AM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		There'a also a huge difference between those who live together and those who don't. Plus parenting issues come into play here. So a single parent living elsewhere is going to have to call and say she can't come over and scrub your kitchen floor as she has a sick person home from school. And no contract that demands this be done every Tuesday morning at 7:37 on the dot will make a lick of difference.

Neither will threatening her with punishment or being released if she calls to say she has to work late. Grow up and deal with it. She has responsibilities.

In addition there is nothing that merits less respect than a so-called dom who whines that his bathroom needs cleaning and he needs a sub to do this because he doesn't know how.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Domestic service / servitude - 2/22/2007 9:56:59 AM   
losttreasure


Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SirDiscipliner69

While I thank you for your repsot which was over 2 years ago...has nothing evolved in your way of thinking or application on the subject in discussion?

No new perception is 2 years?


Actually, SD, my post was just six months ago, but no... nothing in my thinking on this has evolved dramatically since then.  Of course, since FirmHandKY and I have been (for the most part) separated by 800 miles during that time, and because we neither practice nor believe in "online D/s", there hasn't been much impetus to change.

However, as I'm due to become a Kentucky resident in less than 3 weeks... I'll keep you posted. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: losttreasure
You know you've been here too long when you're able to recycle your responses to just about every thread. 

Gosh I hope not!


It certainly feels like it, at times. 


_____________________________

Just because it isn't "all about me", doesn't make it "all about you".

(in reply to SirDiscipliner69)
Profile   Post #: 20
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