Condolences to CalliopePurple (Full Version)

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dcnovice -> Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 1:40:37 PM)

CalliopePurple's grandfather, I learned from the Assocation Game thread, died on Friday. I believe it's the first family death CP has faced, so it seemed meet and right to create a thyread where folks could offer their condolences.

CP, as I said in my message, you and your family have my warmest sympathies!

(Posted here not out of disrespect, but because it's where I've seen CP the most.)




Stephann -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 2:06:31 PM)

Please accept my most heart felt condolences.  Losing a family member is always a challenge.

Stephan



FukinTroll -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 2:08:26 PM)

You have my empathy C. I kinda feel guilty about perving your profile last night now.



CalliopePurple -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 2:22:52 PM)

Thanks, dc and everyone who has and will respond. It's weird for me because, not only is this the first family death I've had, but I wasn't all that close to my grandpa. So I'm seeing everyone else be a complete mess while I'm staying somewhat put together and feeling a little bad about it. And I feel like I should have spent at least a little more time with him while he was at home instead of just hiding on the computer because I had no idea what to say. In these couple of months, despite all the ups and down, he was coherent enough to always call me "shadow".

As much as it's going to test every mental shield I have, I'm going to the memorial service Thursday - although my grandpa was a Marine, he wanted to be cremated and spread over Puget Sound.

This forum is where I spend most of my time, although I do read and sometimes chime in at the others.



dcnovice -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 2:25:16 PM)

Guilt, alas, often comes with loss. It's so easy to think of what I wish I'd done or said when I had the time.



dcnovice -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 2:40:28 PM)

quote:

So I'm seeing everyone else be a complete mess while I'm staying somewhat put together and feeling a little bad about it.


I can identify with that. We've had five family funerals in the past few years, and I went numb each time. It does feel odd to be composed and tearless, thought it's probably helpful (or so I like to hope) to have someone who isn't falling apart.



goodlittlegirl28 -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 2:41:50 PM)

CP, I am very sorry for your loss. In your pbm question I answered that I lost my grandfather at the age of six. It brought back the few memories I have of him, which was a happy reminder. I hope you have many good memories.



RobertCloud -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 3:09:25 PM)

CP, my condolences as well.
When my grandparents passed away it was not that I was distant or that I did not want to shed tears. It was that everyone else was so upset that I felt I had to stay together to help them. I helped to usher people in. I led them around, I was even one that helped carry the coffin because one of the others was too heart broken to be able to do it. I was 12, but I was tall and strong at my first funeral in my family.

Every grandparent I attended, I helped to carry the coffin for the same reason. Someone was unable to do it because they were too emotional and I had been able to keep myself held together for their sake.

I am not saying this to brag, or anything like that, only to say I sympathize. I know exactly how you feel. I will keep you in my thoughts, and send my thoughts and prayers your way.

Peace be with you, CP.



topcat -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 3:11:40 PM)

Dear CP-
 
like you, I have less of a reaction to the death of loved ones than most people, and over the years I have learned not to feel bad about it. For me, I feel it is closely linked to having been very aware of my own mortality, and the fragility of life in general. It doesn't mean you are a bad person<ws>.
 
My condolences on your loss, and my thanks for your Grandfather's service.
 
Stay Warm,
Lawrence



MysticFireTopaz -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 3:21:56 PM)

CP,
 
I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. 
 
Lady Topaz



Stephann -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 3:34:21 PM)

Lawrence makes an excellent point.  When my grandfather died (he was Army, WWII if that matters) he had Alzheimer's so bad he couldn't remember the names of his children.  I felt guilty, at being glad that he was able to finally rest in peace.  I also felt fear, because it's a hereditary condition.

I regularly say to those who are close to me, that we should live life to the fullest.  A bus might smash into my house in the middle of the evening, and it might collapse on me, killing me.  We have risk in every action we take, and every action we do not take carries risks.  Having no fear of death, helps in the easing of the pain of loss I think.  If my mother dies soon (as I imagine she, sadly, will) I will be sad that she is no longer in my life.  I will not cry for her sake, then, but for my own.  She will already be past tears and would be furious with me for wasting the emotion for her, when she is gone.

Stream of consciousness, I know, but there it is.

Stephan



JerseyKrissi72 -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 3:54:44 PM)

I am so sorry for your loss..take comfort that he will be reunited with his loved ones on the other side and is no longer in pain...God bless you and your family in this difficult time. Remember, you can chat with me anytime you need a friend (hugs)



nyrisa -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 4:54:09 PM)

My condolences, to you and your family, CP. The process of death, funerals, and grief, is very difficult. I hope that you will all find the comfort and peace to help you get through it.



twicehappy -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 5:16:18 PM)

Our sympathy hon, big hugs, House PhoenixRisen.



Aileen68 -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 5:39:04 PM)

My sympathy and prayers for your loss.



TemptingNviceSub -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 8:10:52 PM)

Being strong and calm whilst others about you are not , never means you are grieving any less than they are, you are simply grieving in your own way...my condolences for your loss.......Tempting



Mikal -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 8:39:54 PM)

My condolences to you CP... I know what it's like not to be as emotional as some would lead you to believe you should be & how guilt can play into that. But guilt is a useless emotion, and you are who you are... I know that doesn't help, but my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Mikal



CalliopePurple -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/18/2007 10:24:27 PM)

Just again letting everyone know that I am reading this thread and I'm glad for the response, even though most people really only know me through the game threads.



Chloelicious -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/19/2007 1:16:18 AM)

CP,

i do not know you well but i "bumped" in you in some thread so All my thoughts are with you , condolences

Some say because it's over
We should be said but that's not true
Cause death may seem something nasty
But it belongs to me and you
Don't try to avoid your destiny
Accept this kiss with dignity
In this embrace you'll find relief
Get rid of all your grief
Some say because it's over we should be
free





darchChylde -> RE: Condolences to CalliopePurple (2/19/2007 3:00:05 PM)

HUGS TO YOU



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