Long Distance Relationship

Long Distance Relationship (Full Version)

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purelydevoted -> Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 1:08:25 PM)
i am certain that this has been hashed out to death, but since i am new, i am hoping you can all give a new look at this. Has or does anyone live a long-distance relationship, and does it work for you? Did you move to live in? How long did you wait? Any thoughts are appreciated. Be well!

greeneyes1962 -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 1:17:04 PM)
I am currently in a LDR, with plans to move much closer to him by the summer. I will probably spend 6 months living in an apartment there, with plans to move in together if everything continues to go well. In the meantime, we talk on the phone several times a day ( thanks to having the same cell phone plan), we don't get to see each other much, due to living on opposite coasts, but the sacrifice is worth it for the time being, for our ultimate goal to be met.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 1:24:01 PM)
http://www.collarchat.com/m_688989/mpage_3/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#689642 LDRs and you http://www.collarchat.com/m_555442/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#555476 How do you cope? http://www.collarchat.com/m_399208/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#399230 Long distance relationships...how do you all make them work and overcome the obstacles that arise? http://www.collarchat.com/m_358232/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#358330 When the Master is away http://www.collarchat.com/m_243191/mpage_2/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#243396 Online or Distance relationships http://www.collarchat.com/m_5502/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#207957 Long Distance Relationships http://www.collarchat.com/m_214831/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#214831 Long distance d/s http://www.collarchat.com/m_210165/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#210165 Pleasing my master long distance http://www.collarchat.com/m_131170/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#131170 In Between Visits http://www.collarchat.com/m_124826/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#124826 LDR and sickness or death http://www.collarchat.com/m_89834/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#89834 Long distance punishment ideas http://www.collarchat.com/m_22973/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#22973 Long Distance Relationship (2) http://www.collarchat.com/m_5502/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#5502 Long Distance Relationships (2) http://www.collarchat.com/m_3521/mpage_1/key_long%252Cdistance/tm.htm#3521 Long Distance http://www.collarchat.com/m_272610/mpage_1/key_LDR/tm.htm#272610 LDR D/s ideas http://www.collarchat.com/m_108560/mpage_1/key_LDR/tm.htm#108560 Long Distance Relationships????

Wulfchyld -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 1:25:05 PM)
Let's look at it another way. Let's look at emotional proximity. Let's say that you live next door to your "D" and yet he/she is always millions of miles away emotionally. Do you think he/she will ever close that distance? On the other hand the "D" lives 1,000 miles away and is always with you emotionally, like you were hand in hand, when you are finally together where do you think he/she will be emotionally?

toservez -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 1:27:23 PM)
It is what works for both of you. To me the important things are that both people are in agreement to the amount and type of contact. That both people are on the same page in the direction and time table to eventually be physically living together and not just have some whenever type flight of fancy about it. My number one piece of advice though is not to determine how ready you are based on time in the relationship but based on the amount of time you have been together physically. No amount of phone time can equate to real time both in the D/s part and in general compatibility either. Until you have enough time spent together I would not think of uprooting and moving. It is until you can see the person when it feels like a boring routine day, or not have your feelings solely determined by their physical presence is enough to make everything just perfect and that you can take a step back in their presence and go this is how life will truly be, would be the time to make the more serious decisions.

OnlyHis -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 2:09:12 PM)
I have been in a LTR with Master for almost 6 years. For 5 years i have belonged to Him as His slave. We have been together 4 times ranging from two weeks to eight months. The time i spend with Master is always wonderful and learning experience. The time away from Him is just as valuable to me . He has given me a routine to follow, that He changes from time to time as we have grown into the relationship together. LDR can be a lot of work , as any relationship can be. There are emotional roller coasters for both the Master and slave but if you really feel that He is the one for you , you can get over those speedbumps and over the walls that sometimes get in the way. Be well

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 2:38:17 PM)
My girl and I have been in an LDR for two years. When she petitioned, we thought we'd be across the country from each other pretty much forever. Since the relationship isn't sexual and there really isn't a lot of SM either, this was ok. Things change, though, and I'm now in a position to move...and I am in August. Instead of being a 5 hours plane ride, we'll be a 2 hour drive from each other. We'll never live together unless, heaven forbid, something happens to her husband unexpectedly. If she ever becomes single, I'll want her with me. Master Fire

BabyNyla -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 2:48:04 PM)
I am in a LDR right now, of sorts. My husband has been in Iraq since August of last year. This has been the hardest experience of my life. About 2 months after he had been gone, I told my best friend that I could not go through a second deployment again, and I would rather be divorced and single. I have had a lot of confusion about being submissive and somedays it's so hard to not have him here with me, to talk to me, to sort things out with me, etc. I am lucky in that I get to talk to him almost every day ... he makes time to IM with me or talk to me on the phone for a few hours. Alot of my friends only get to talk to their hubbies once a month ... so I am blessed. I think that knowing how he feels and how much he cares makes the strain of the distance worthwhile. I know know that I would stick with him no matter what. Him and I have talked and we have decided that he will renew his contract for an additional 4 years. So now I am faced with many many more deployments in my future. On one hand it makes me sad, but on the other it makes me happy because I think the distance makes us stronger (both realizing what we really need and the things we take for granted) and I wouldn't have it any other way :) Nyla

DominaSmartass -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 3:29:12 PM)
I have been with my boyfriend, who is sometimes submissive, always a bottom, and also my "little girl" (it's a long story!) for 6 months now. We moved in after dating long distance for 5 months. Our relationship has always been LD because of my job which keeps me away from home for weeks at a time but we have managed to spend a few solid blocks of 2 weeks here and there together. We certainly both felt the time we did spend was enough to warrant co-habitating. But it's kind of different for us than most LD couples who choose to move in together because even though we are "living together" I am still away for work most of the time and thus we don't face the same issues that couples who see each other day in and out do. People warned me that moving in with someone that soon would be a bad idea. So far, I can't say I've had any issues. I just knew this was right, gut feeling, followed it, and don't regret it. There you go, that's what worked for me. As for how we keep up the relationship...we talk online and on the phone tons each day (both our jobs let us be in front of a computer and IM while at work.) And then we have my extended off weeks to be together 24/7.

bearincuffs -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 8:21:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: purelydevoted i am certain that this has been hashed out to death, but since i am new, i am hoping you can all give a new look at this. Has or does anyone live a long-distance relationship, and does it work for you? Did you move to live in? How long did you wait? Any thoughts are appreciated. Be well! It is tough having a LDR and there are other obsticles involved which takes hard work to overcome, at least it was for me. The first two I was involved with lasted a short time but that was mainly becasue I got involved with a married man! I was young at the time and wasn't ready to settle down! Now that I'm older I'm once again in a LDR with Master and approx 900 miles separating us. We are seriously working on having me move into his House. This still has some obsticles but being a bit more wiser, I am taking this more seriously then I did when I was in my late teens and early 20's. For many, a LDr is almost impossible to maintain, but there are many couples who are able to overcome the distance factor and end up living together under one roof. If both people really want a LDR to move forward they will do what is necessary for that to happen and I salute their commitment to sustaining a LDR.

SimplyMichael -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 8:29:31 PM)
I have done ldr, two and three hours away, they all suck. At this point, if I can't walk to her house, I just don't think I would be interested.

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 8:35:15 PM)
The forum regulars know this story pretty well, since I have been pretty vocal about it. Angel and I were long distance for 7 months. 3 of them were just dating/playing, and then he got his collar in September. We went from one extreme to another, from play all the time, to almost no playtime. We went weeks without contact at all, and then talked every night for hours at a time some weeks. It worked well for us, but it was very very difficult. Recently, I relocated to his town. Not FOR him, as many have said, but becasue this was one of a few cities on my list of places to look into to move ahead for work and getting out on my own. He sweetened the pot a good bit, as did the store I was asked to work for. In our long distance time together, we saw one another a totla of 10 days over 2 visits. Ideal, hardly. But, we managed becaue we were serious about eventually ebing together. It paid off. Brilliantly. We are both very happy and close together now. After graduation, we are hoping to move to a 24/7 live in situation, but we are taking it in steps. For now, we are content to be close by and easy access. DV

Noah -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 9:14:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld Let's look at it another way. Let's look at emotional proximity. Let's say that you live next door to your "D" and yet he/she is always millions of miles away emotionally. Do you think he/she will ever close that distance? On the other hand the "D" lives 1,000 miles away and is always with you emotionally, like you were hand in hand, when you are finally together where do you think he/she will be emotionally? Thanks for one of the best posts I've seen on the subject.

Wulfchyld -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 9:16:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Noah Thanks for one of the best posts I've seen on the subject. My pleasure Noah.

dawntreader -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 9:27:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael I have done ldr, two and three hours away, they all suck. At this point, if I can't walk to her house, I just don't think I would be interested. Same here. Although i am hoping that 45 minutes doesn't turn out to be "too far" but as in the past , time will tell...

dawntreader -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 9:32:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld Let's look at it another way. Let's look at emotional proximity. Let's say that you live next door to your "D" and yet he/she is always millions of miles away emotionally. Do you think he/she will ever close that distance? On the other hand the "D" lives 1,000 miles away and is always with you emotionally, like you were hand in hand, when you are finally together where do you think he/she will be emotionally? i can see the wisdom in this, i just can't pull from my own experiences on this... physical distance has always been an issue because they were emotionally distant after "acheiving" their conquest. i have obviously made alot of poor choices :-(

Lorelei115 -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 9:55:40 PM)
I've been in LDR's of all types, from across the country to just an hour or two away. All I can say is this. The ones that are outside a day trip away have NEVER worked for me. However, this is because I'm a very physical person. If I can't touch and be touched I feel as though I am missing an essential ingredient in a relationship. If it works for someone else, great! If it works for me someday, great! But to date, it never has.

slavejali -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 11:02:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld Let's look at it another way. Let's look at emotional proximity. Let's say that you live next door to your "D" and yet he/she is always millions of miles away emotionally. Do you think he/she will ever close that distance? On the other hand the "D" lives 1,000 miles away and is always with you emotionally, like you were hand in hand, when you are finally together where do you think he/she will be emotionally? That's a really good point, we are more than flesh and bone and I think the things that bind us to another are the things that can't be seen. Saying that however, long distance wouldn't work for me in any long term way. Like I spent 11 months chatting to Master and nearly went insane, like really. I don't think I would have coped even if when he finally got here he decided to be sensible and live apart but close for awhile. I'm an all or nothing girlie. There is something to be said about "touch".

Wulfchyld -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/1/2007 11:04:31 PM)
Jali, that first touch must have been like the tigers and the strawberry.

greeneyes1962 -> RE: Long Distance Relationship (2/2/2007 12:45:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Wulfchyld Let's look at it another way. Let's look at emotional proximity. Let's say that you live next door to your "D" and yet he/she is always millions of miles away emotionally. Do you think he/she will ever close that distance? On the other hand the "D" lives 1,000 miles away and is always with you emotionally, like you were hand in hand, when you are finally together where do you think he/she will be emotionally? exactly why i am willing to move accross the country to be with him. i never had the emotional intimacy in my very long marriage that i have with my Dominant, much less the trust i have in him. with him, i am never afraid of how he will react to anything, unlike my previous life.

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