RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff

RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (Full Version)

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katzschen -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 7:26:59 PM)
Thank you, Holly, that was beautifully well-written. Exactly what I was thinking.

MagiksSlave -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 7:32:23 PM)
Just heather I wasnt refering to a relationship that wasnt healthy exept maybe my own relationship with myself... I want to keep an open mind here but this sends up a big bright red flag to me thats all. Im not saying anything bad about the op just that Im worried about where his head is that is all. I didnt speak out of intolerance but out of consern. Magik's slave

MagiksSlave -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 7:36:25 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LycanHorde quote: ORIGINAL: whisperedsighs "Im sorry but does this thread only worry me?? Magik's slave" I was thinking the same thing. But was trying hard to shove down that thought and keep an open mind. Then I saw your post. Now .... oh hell. What do I know anyway??? If you take the original poster at his/her word you're worried needlessly. He/she clearly states that they seek pain "without causing any permanent damage". Unless the OP states otherwise in a later post I think it would be reasonable to say that this one is seeking the pain as a means of sexual arousal, or satisfying their curiousity or as a mechanism to relieve stress. Best laid plans offten go awry!!! But i will make a suggestion. Rubber band around your wrist you want pain snap it it helped me alot the ice was a good idea too squeeze some ice cubes hard in your fists till they are gone.. The produses a sharp pain. anythiong that wont break the skin is ideal. I really didnt mean any harm in my posts just consern that is all. Magik's slave

hisannabelle -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 7:37:03 PM)
i would also be slightly concerned about possible psychological issues with self-injury, as it was something that i spent a lot of time dealing with myself. then again, there's every possibility of psychological issues in bdsm relationships as well...but i know for myself that s&m in my relationship has not fed my own si issues. so on that note i can understand that there may be people out there who wish to cause pain to themselves, and it not be in a psychologically damaging situation such as mine. that said, i do not have a lot to offer in the way of answers, but i did want to say that i found many of the answers and ideas given here very interesting - thank you to the op for asking this question, and to the responders for your ideas. :)

ownedgirlie -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 7:44:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HollyS Honestly people, if you're so worried about the OP why not write her a private note? Your responses so far aren't answering the question and make annoying assumptions. Maybe she's in a distance D/s relationship which requires a certain amount of self-inflicted pain. There are plenty of reasons within a D/s or S/m context for one to hurt oneself. Thank you for this. I have said in previous posts, that I do not understand why people who are so concerned about one's well being end up grandstanding about it on a thread rather than privately emailing the person a note asking if they are ok. I figured the OP had her reasons. She didn't ask to be psychobabbled to death, she asked what were things she could do. Great post, Holly.

MagiksSlave -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 7:46:08 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie quote: ORIGINAL: HollyS Honestly people, if you're so worried about the OP why not write her a private note? Your responses so far aren't answering the question and make annoying assumptions. Maybe she's in a distance D/s relationship which requires a certain amount of self-inflicted pain. There are plenty of reasons within a D/s or S/m context for one to hurt oneself. Thank you for this. I have said in previous posts, that I do not understand why people who are so concerned about one's well being end up grandstanding about it on a thread rather than privately emailing the person a note asking if they are ok. I figured the OP had her reasons. She didn't ask to be psychobabbled to death, she asked what were things she could do. Great post, Holly. maybe she didnt ask for it but come on we all know on these boards you dont get what you ask for and are you gunna honestly shoot people for being conserned, I dont recall any flameing so I dont see a problem with genuan consern. Magik's slave

HerEmeraldEyes -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 7:57:17 PM)
ok - having read the OP's profile on CM's main site I understand that his is young, inexperienced and without a Mistress. All these things make it hard to FIND a good mistress and a masochist often is miserable without a some pain in their lives, so I totally understand his wish to find some way to safely administer self-pain until he finds a mistress who will joyfully do so for him. Renorei (hope I spelled that right) If you are seeking a sexual aid through pain, try masturbating with a SMALL amount of tiger balm or vicks mixed with a generous amount of vasoline. It will give a pain-LIKE tingle to your penis, provided you do not rub any skin off. LOL I've used this method MANY times with submissives who require pain to orgasm and it is very effective. BE SURE to wash it off with plenty of COLD water and NO soap when finished. DONT touch your eyes. Lady Emerald

ownedgirlie -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 7:59:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie quote: ORIGINAL: HollyS Honestly people, if you're so worried about the OP why not write her a private note? Your responses so far aren't answering the question and make annoying assumptions. Maybe she's in a distance D/s relationship which requires a certain amount of self-inflicted pain. There are plenty of reasons within a D/s or S/m context for one to hurt oneself. Thank you for this. I have said in previous posts, that I do not understand why people who are so concerned about one's well being end up grandstanding about it on a thread rather than privately emailing the person a note asking if they are ok. I figured the OP had her reasons. She didn't ask to be psychobabbled to death, she asked what were things she could do. Great post, Holly. maybe she didnt ask for it but come on we all know on these boards you dont get what you ask for and are you gunna honestly shoot people for being conserned, I dont recall any flameing so I dont see a problem with genuan consern. Magik's slave No, I am concerned with people advocating suicide out of their concern for others.

HollyS -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 8:22:24 PM)
Thanks everyone who heard what I had to say earlier in this thread. Renorei, if you're still reading know that many of us make no assumptions about your life or your circumstances. Someone else's advice was that "you dont get what you ask for" -- I would say that sometimes you do, when thoughtful people make an effort to respect your question and answer it genuinely. Separate the wheat from the chaff and take what works for you. That said... quote: ORIGINAL: HerEmeraldEyes ok - having read the OP's profile on CM's main site I understand that his is young, inexperienced and without a Mistress. Perhaps I didn't get the memo... Renorei's main CM profile states that she is a female switch. I've seen more than one person refer to the OP as "him" and offer advice one could only take were one endowed with a penis. Am I missing some crucial information somewhere? I'd hate to keep referring to the OP as "her" if "he" is more appropriate. If I'm in error, Renorei, my sincerest apologies. ~Holly, whose suggestions still work regardless of gender

MagiksSlave -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 8:25:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave quote: ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie quote: ORIGINAL: HollyS Honestly people, if you're so worried about the OP why not write her a private note? Your responses so far aren't answering the question and make annoying assumptions. Maybe she's in a distance D/s relationship which requires a certain amount of self-inflicted pain. There are plenty of reasons within a D/s or S/m context for one to hurt oneself. Thank you for this. I have said in previous posts, that I do not understand why people who are so concerned about one's well being end up grandstanding about it on a thread rather than privately emailing the person a note asking if they are ok. I figured the OP had her reasons. She didn't ask to be psychobabbled to death, she asked what were things she could do. Great post, Holly. maybe she didnt ask for it but come on we all know on these boards you dont get what you ask for and are you gunna honestly shoot people for being conserned, I dont recall any flameing so I dont see a problem with genuan consern. Magik's slave No, I am concerned with people advocating suicide out of their concern for others. Ok that just clicked in I wasnt advocating suiside I was jokeing about his avatar and that was all. Magik's slave

proudsub -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 8:33:49 PM)
quote: ok - having read the OP's profile on CM's main site I understand that his is young, inexperienced and without a Mistress. Hmmmm, when i bring up the profiles it's for a female switch. Before Hubby became my Master i did some self-inflicted pain for arousal and to learn what i liked and didn't like. What worked best for me were clothes pins on nips, toothpaste on the clit and Ben Gay on the ass. Inserting a butt plug can also be very painful but great once it is in. Have fun with it.[:)]

Zsuzsanna -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 8:36:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave Just heather I wasnt refering to a relationship that wasnt healthy exept maybe my own relationship with myself... I want to keep an open mind here but this sends up a big bright red flag to me thats all. Im not saying anything bad about the op just that Im worried about where his head is that is all. I didnt speak out of intolerance but out of consern. Magik's slave Exactly

SlaveAkasha -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 9:16:20 PM)
I have tried the bad stuff (razor blades) and broke myself of that. If I need some pain or release, I use a cane or belt and do as much as I feel like I need. It's just a way to help me get things out or something, I'm not sure. Some good suggestions here, hope you find something that will help you. His Kasha

sweetnurseBBW -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 9:20:38 PM)
Personally for me doing things to myself does nothing for me. Tried the hairbrush thing , didn't do a thing for me. First I do not get the good spots like Master does and do not do it nearly as hard. For me it is much more exciting and arousable when he does it. Just be careful with what you do. Some good suggestions have been made on things to do, so I won't repeat them. Good luck and be careful.

Noah -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 9:43:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Renorei This isn't necessarily BDSM related, but I need a great way to hurt myself really good, but without causing any permanent damage. Currently, I spank myself with a metal ruler wrapped in black electrical tape, but I need something a little more painful. I guess you could say this is self inflicted punishment, haha. Lots of good advice and some thoughtful comments rolling in between the presumptuous malarkey Holly, I'm nominating you for hall monitor, with those extra short hall monitor skirts, of course. All I wanna do is wish this Renorei well and thank him/her for putting such an amusing title on the thread. Kind of reminds me of Joey Spampinato singing: "I wanna be immortal for a little while."

Zsuzsanna -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/7/2007 10:52:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Zsuzsanna quote: ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave Just heather I wasnt refering to a relationship that wasnt healthy exept maybe my own relationship with myself... I want to keep an open mind here but this sends up a big bright red flag to me thats all. Im not saying anything bad about the op just that Im worried about where his head is that is all. I didnt speak out of intolerance but out of consern. Magik's slave Exactly I think I am the 1st one I have seen to quote myself but I just wanted to say that I meant no disrespect. It just reminded me of when I used to want to hurt myself and I was worried that maybe she/he was going through the same thing.

onestandingstill -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/8/2007 5:30:49 AM)
Funny I read the original OP and immediately thought this is someone who wants to play with herself. I did not think self abuse as they stated no permanent injury. That keyed me into this person wants to play not do something terrible to them selves. For me even though I'm quite the play slut I don't get off on causing myself pain. For me it's the energy shared from the Dom/Domme in the scene to me that gets me what I need, not the sensation on my skin. Maybe if I was a masochist and not just an extreme player I'd want to do this too as it would be like Nnicorrette gum is to smoking. suzanne

CelticPrince -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/8/2007 10:27:28 AM)
Renorei Seriously, find a Dominant and enjoy him/her. CP

HerEmeraldEyes -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/8/2007 2:05:04 PM)
As I am human and not truly a Goddess in the literal form, I occassionally make mistakes. As I am laying here on my lap top on day two of a severe case of stomache flu complete with sleep deprivation and vomiting and re-read the profile I discover I, in my human nature, I made the mistake of reading the profile and neglected the line at the top that read female switch. Renorei, my apology for misreading your profile and being human with a falible nature. Especially while laying here in bed with a lap top watching reruns on the spike network. The "network for men" must have gone to my head!!! [:)] (joke!!!) But I reiterate that being young and inexperienced sometimes makes it difficult to FIND a good Dominant and if she is smart and careful she is not the type to take the first male on this site that waves a whip and says "pick me, pick me" Which means she may have some personal, pain issues she requires to take care of for herself. My origional post with my orgional suggestion however is still effective. Tiger balm or vicks in a small amount with a bit of vaseline (spelling???) on the fingers when masturbating does provide an amount of pain during pleasure (have personally used this method) Good Luck Renorei Lady Emerald

MasDom -> RE: Need help with some self-inflicted stuff (1/8/2007 2:14:18 PM)
Hey just never use light bulbs, vacuum cleaners ,or the wrong end of a turkey baster and you should be fine. As for me. I inflict pain because in a neo pagan. My believes revolve around forced physical evolution. You know, go jump in a cold stream until you don't feel the cold any more. Smack yourself with kendo sticks until you don't feel the sting any more, that sort of thing. Hope you never know my joy. Some times I miss the pain...

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