Question re Bisexuality (Full Version)

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LadyEllen -> Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 6:27:24 AM)

Here’s a question I’ve wondered about a while. This seems about the best place to post it, as its not really anything bdsm related (though it could be, I guess). I'd be interested in the views of those who identify as bisexual on it.

Is there a qualitative difference for bisexual people in their sexuality, dependent on the sex of their partner? (for the purposes of the question, lets keep it to simple male/female).

By which I mean, is their own psychology/sexuality always the same, regardless of the sex of their partner, or does it change in some way dependent on the sex of their partner (real or imaginary!)?

Note – this isn’t about what is “normal” (whatever that might be).

I ask this because I have become more bisexual myself over recent years, yet I feel that were my partner a female, then I’d be inclined to want her and behave with her in a way which would be different, should my partner be a male. And before the sniggering starts – I’m talking about psychologically; I don’t mean purely the mechanical stuff!

What interests me I guess, is whether this is common anyway, or whether it’s a function of who I am/ what I was (for anyone who doesnt know, I'm TS).

Thanks for your thoughts

E



LaTigresse -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 7:15:55 AM)

LadyE, I think I understand what you are asking.

And I would think that yes, many people that have been with both genders would say they behave differently with each. I know that I certainly did. I would even venture to say that it is a large part of the reason I prefer women now. I don't like the person I become with a man. 



Lorelei115 -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 7:30:24 AM)

I was actually thinking about this the other day, while I was filling out a survey about ideal partners male/female. And yes, I think there is a difference in both the way I want my partners to be and the way that I act. After all, I like girls because they are feminine, and I like guys because they are masculine. Each trait tends to bring out a different response in me.



SlaveAkasha -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 7:47:10 AM)

I think there is also.  I have noticed I do have certain things that come out more, depending on which sex I am with at the time. 
 
Even sexually there is a difference for me.  With men, it's more animalistic, I let them go at it, and I enjoy it, but don't really take charge at all.  With women, it's totally a  more erotic experience for me... longer, and more drawn out.
 
Kasha



toservez -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 7:56:24 AM)

I have found certainly there can be a difference in how I think and the type of sex I enjoy when being with a man or a woman for the most part but not always. I like all types from both sexes but have found over the years that the mindset when with a woman is a more gentle and love making atmosphere as compared to being with a man. I enjoy aggressive hard sex with a woman very much but I think conditioning since it happens rarely that I do not expect it to happen.

Now in terms of being different with the two genders I do think I am mostly the same except for I will enjoy being more assertive and taking the lead with another woman if it happens that way, while being with a man if that happens it does lessen the experience for me.



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 8:07:38 AM)

Reposted:
Bisexuality isn't ONE spectrum, it's two.  You could be attracted to one male in 1000 and 999 women in 1000 and I'd still call you bisexual. 

This is my spectrum:

Males
1<------5---X->10

Females
1<---X-5------>10

I consider myself bisexual.

But it doesn't matter much- pick who you want to be with and what you do with that person. 

http://www.collarchat.com/m_512292/mpage_1/key_bisexual/tm.htm#512379
understanding bisexuality




pinkkeith -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 9:35:30 AM)

I think this is over simplified. I tend to act differently regarding the psychology and needs of the individual not solely based on their gender. Yes, there are differences between men and women, but there are also differences between two different men as much as there are between a man and a woman.



Lorelei115 -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 10:48:32 AM)

Good point. We all expect different things from any partner we're with, and we all act different ways with them, regardless of gender...



LaTigresse -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (1/4/2007 11:44:37 AM)

It's funny but I was thinking the exact same thing earlier after I read thru this thread and replied. 



SATANMAN -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/16/2007 12:02:55 PM)

i am bi but prefer women



wyldsubmissive -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/16/2007 12:07:36 PM)

I am bisexual, but I prefer men in vanilla relationships and women in lifestyle ones.

HOWEVER:

When I'm with a woman I become the male in the relationship, when with a man the reverse is true. (Obviously.) I'm intensely protective, loving and caring with a female. With a male I don't lose those traits but I... utilize them to a lesser extent.

Make sense?



domiguy -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/16/2007 12:16:41 PM)

After much introspection I have hit upon this remarkable relevation....I am straight and have found that I am much more attracted to two women than one. 



FukinTroll -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/16/2007 12:22:54 PM)

Being a hard core lesbian I don't think I can be very objective.



Vendaval -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/16/2007 4:13:46 PM)

Excuses, excuses!  Feh!  [sm=shake.gif]

quote:

ORIGINAL: FukinTroll
Being a hard core lesbian I don't think I can be very objective.



amativedame -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/16/2007 5:54:16 PM)

I know for me that is definetly the case (and I doubt that I'd be going out on a ledge to think that its the same for at least half of the other people in this world.)


Your post has gotten me wondering if it has anything to do with the sterotyping we have for what we expect each "gender" to be.



farglebargle -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/16/2007 5:56:59 PM)

Well, when I'm with other guys, there's a lot more High-Fiveing going on...

And in the TV's PIP is Sportscenter.




Solinear -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/16/2007 11:00:46 PM)

Sexually?  Not really.  Day-to-day?  I definitely act differently towards the men that I've been with than the women.  I want to protect and nurture the women, but not so much with the men.



LotusSong -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/17/2007 7:33:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

After much introspection I have hit upon this remarkable relevation....I am straight and have found that I am much more attracted to two women than one. 


So, conjoined female twins would be your dream date? :)



pahunkboy -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/17/2007 10:23:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Reposted:
Bisexuality isn't ONE spectrum, it's two.  You could be attracted to one male in 1000 and 999 women in 1000 and I'd still call you bisexual. 

This is my spectrum:

Males
1<------5---X->10

Females
1<---X-5------>10

I consider myself bisexual.

But it doesn't matter much- pick who you want to be with and what you do with that person. 

http://www.collarchat.com/m_512292/mpage_1/key_bisexual/tm.htm#512379
understanding bisexuality




Good point.

A few years back- A female buddy of mine acused her husband of being gay. When she was in FL- her step brother told someone who told her- that her con artist step brother, when he lived with her and her then husband- claimed "Paul banged Jerries Azz." Well I lived with the unhappy couple too for a year. Paul had every chance to make a pass at me. When she confronted Paul, his reply, "I will kill him."

I told my friend Jane Doe, Paul is not gay, not bi. Paul would lay the homelious lady way before the most attractive male. Paul is not gay/bi..
I went on to tell her he never made a pass at me what-so-ever in the time I lived with them.

By the way, Jane Doe, you still owe me 2k. ya might want to avoid me- if you move back to PA.



Vendaval -> RE: Question re Bisexuality (2/17/2007 5:45:50 PM)

Great question Lady Ellen,
 
I would have to say that what yes, my own behavior changes
depending the gender, (physiological or psychcological) of
my partners.  The spectrum of feminine to masculine is pretty
wide, and my tastes tend towards the middle, the more
andrygynous people usually appeal most to me.  



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