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How did you know? - 12/14/2006 10:22:33 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		Putting this here because the answer may be totally un bdsm related for some.
My question is how did you know he / she was the one?
 
Edited to add - By 'the one' i mean the one for now, the one forever, the one for tomorrow. Not really asking if you believe in 'the one.'

 
 

< Message edited by missturbation -- 12/14/2006 11:03:15 AM >

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 10:31:31 AM   
SlaveAkasha


Posts: 726
Joined: 9/30/2006
From: Indiana
Status: offline 		Had no clue.  Actually, I am not sure I believe in a "one" at all.
 
I think there are wonderful people that make us happy and sometimes those relationships last forever, and sometimes just for a bit.
 
I think everyone gets too fixated on the "one" and might really miss out on wonderful shorter experiences with someone that is the "one right now".
 
I have had many "ones", I have had one that I never got to be with, one that I was with for a few years, one that turned into a jerk, and one that I am with now that I really love and hope to be with for the rest of my life.
 
It's all about finding someone that we feel our best with, be it in an M/s, D/s, or vanilla relationship.... and just taking that time for what it is and enjoying the hell out of it.
 
Kasha

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 10:32:15 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline 		I don't know if this answer will help you, but it has been how I answered the question for myself.
quote:

My question is how did you know he / she was the one?
 
When I met and got to know beth, she made me believe in things that, until I met her, I KNEW were not true and impossible.

What those things are isn't material, but the fact that she made "facts" fiction and the "impossible" possible, was enough for me.

Edited to add:
quote:

Slave Akasha: Actually, I am not sure I believe in a "one" at all.

Akasha,
That was one of those "facts" I was speaking. I didn't either, and argued strongly against the concept.

< Message edited by Mercnbeth -- 12/14/2006 11:24:58 AM >

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 11:18:28 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		Thanx akasha but what made you know ur present sir is 'the one' for now, tomorrow, forever or however you see it?
 
Thanq mercnbeth - wud be interesting to know how beth knew?

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 11:46:13 AM   
SlaveAkasha


Posts: 726
Joined: 9/30/2006
From: Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

Thanx akasha but what made you know ur present sir is 'the one' for now, tomorrow, forever or however you see it?
 
Thanq mercnbeth - wud be interesting to know how beth knew?


Gosh, Miss.. I really wish I could pinpoint it for you.  I know that I love spending time with him and I miss him terribly till he gets home.  I feel like a lost puppy pacing in front of the door when it's close to time for him.  When he wraps his arms around me at night and I feel the most protected I have ever felt.  When he lets me know I belong to him and I want nothing more.  When I make something from scratch and he is amazed that I could have made it taste so good.  When I wanted to hang Christmas lights up and the poor guy helped me fix them till they were perfect.  When my big dog wants to sleep up on his pillow and he doesn't complain..too much..lol.  When we are walking into a store and he grabs my hand and holds it.
 
It's just a ton of little things, but they add up.  I think it's different for everyone and there isn't a magic formula that tells us when it's right.  It's confusing at times, but even if it's only short-lived, at least you lived it.
 
Kasha

_____________________________

Look, if you want to torture me, spank me, lick me, do it. But if this poetry shit continues just shoot me now please.
~ Tank Girl

www.peta.org
www.goveg.com

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 11:51:42 AM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline 		Everything becomes natural and stress free. Not guessing at things or worrying about tomorrow or next week in terms of the relationship. To feel more comfortable with him then to be without him.



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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 11:56:21 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		I think for me its being not only willing but wanting to do the things i never imagined i would. I think i have finally found someone that i dont want to be without and am willing to give up my limits too.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 11:58:55 AM   
Yourangelic1


Posts: 42
Joined: 12/7/2006
Status: offline 		For me, it was when i couldnt think of anything else, that i was absorbed with the thoughts of the next time they would be near, and i would  be given the priveledge to serve them again. Its a hunger, to have someone to submit to.

i think Akasha has some important points to make though, especially for me, who has just experienced the feeling of moving on from my first D/s relationship. It is about enjoying the time we have with each person we are with, and even if that time is short she said she got something out of each relationship.

If the person you are interested in fulfills you for now, i would say to embrace those feelings and not miss out on the opportunity to serve Him/Her, with worrying about if its the One.. Good advice, thank You for posting this topic..
angelic

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 12:24:50 PM   
Chaingang


Posts: 1727
Joined: 10/24/2005
Status: offline 		I think that a strong sense of connection exists when you meet someone that makes you want to be better than who you already are. For me that special someone was probably my cat. It happened to me once before too, when I was much younger and in relation to a dog. I haven't felt that way about a human being because human beings aren't helpless in the same way. But domesticated species like cats and dogs are very reliant on humanity to provide for them. And we made them what they are in many ways - we made them for ourselves.

I think love takes from you but that you give it freely. I adore my cat.

Sad, ain't it?

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 12:27:55 PM   
gypsygrl


Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline 		Yeah, I agree with the others and try to stay in the present and not worry too much about an intangible future.

But, I met someone not too long ago, and going into the meeting I was pretty convinced that while I liked him as a person, he was soooo much not my type, I really didn't think it was gonna amount to anything.  The actual meeting involved a long drive, made longer by holiday traffic and me getting lost, so by the time I got to where I was going, I was pretty much a wreck.  But, as soon as I saw him, I just felt instantly relaxed and at ease, more so than with anyone I've ever met before.  I was only gonna stay for a day, but didn't leave until I absolutely had to, and stayed for 3 days.  I felt kind of like Edward Gory's "doubtful guest."  lol

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 1:10:18 PM   
daddysprop247


Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline 		well call me idealistic, but i happen to very much believe in a "One", and i think we're extremely fortunate if we get to meet or be with our One in this lifetime. but i'm not sure when i knew for certain that Daddy was the One. it wasn't when he first claimed me or in the early stages of our relationship...in those days i kept expecting to be released at any moment. probably i knew he was truly the One when he saw me at my absolute worst (severely depressed, suicidal), and i could look in his eyes and still see the love there.

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 2:17:38 PM   
yourMissTress


Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		The day that I looked into her eyes and all I could think was that I wanted to be with her, and have her with me, through all the remaining stages of life. 

I know that sounds sappy, but that's really how I came to know that she was the one for me. I've been married and had several LTR's over the years, and I've never had that feeling or thought for anyone else.

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"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother


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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 5:00:07 PM   
FangsNfeet


Posts: 3758
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline 		We meet each other at the right time and under the right conditions. We where both single, looking, and kinky at the same time. It works and if it ain't broke, then don't fix it. She's the one for me. 

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 7:03:40 PM   
NeedToUseYou


Posts: 2297
Joined: 12/24/2005
From: None of your business
Status: offline 		I knew she was the one when she rescued my from my false reality. When I was rebuilt as if I was never alive before. When she believed enough in me to know that I was her one, I knew she was my one. She made me believe I could stop bullets, I could fly, and control the world around me,and that love could keep me alive when the life in my body had departed.

Oh wait, that was the matrix. LOL, I always think of Neo everytime some one says the one.

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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 7:05:25 PM   
cuddleheart50


Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Used to believe in the "One" ...dont anymore.

The "One" I'm with now..how I knew...there was chemistry!!!!

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Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.


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RE: How did you know? - 12/14/2006 7:18:16 PM   
Dtesmoac


Posts: 565
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline 		..........at breakfast time I still enjoyed being with her.........!!! years on, on the rare occasions there are no kids about........I still enjoy being with her at breakfast...........


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RE: How did you know? - 12/18/2006 5:47:29 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		How enjoyable to see you sick twists talking about the intagibles...lol.

The "one." It is an interesting subject....how to encapsulate it into words is the dificult part...Enjoyed Dtesmoac"s breakfast contribution...and what would this thread be without homage to "neo."

I believe it is as much about the person as it is to time and space...Were you in the right position at that time in your life to recognize her when she was with you?

It's long after the infatuation stage, no surging adrenaline. It's when communication is obtained through a touch or a glance.  Staring into space and daydreaming and to find that your thought has turned to her...something rather benign like her hair,smile or how she looks at others with compassion....Definitely hard to define.
Just a few thoughts.

out.

D.G.

p.s. Jesus please protect me from your followers.

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RE: How did you know? - 12/25/2006 4:53:24 PM   
siamsa24


Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline 		When we split up and I was the most unhappy that I have ever been in my life.  I know that sounds silly, because everyone is unhappy when they split up with somone, but I was lost.  

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RE: How did you know? - 12/25/2006 7:27:16 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		When I was willing to leave much of everything I know to be with her. Demand my family accept her. And now when I am afraid that no one else will ever make me believe there is a "one" again. When I realized just now the pain of the loss has become such a part of me I forget it is there.

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Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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RE: How did you know? - 12/25/2006 7:36:54 PM   
MzMia


Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Putting this here because the answer may be totally un bdsm related for some.
My question is how did you know he / she was the one?

Edited to add - By 'the one' i mean the one for now, the one forever, the one for tomorrow. Not really asking if you believe in 'the one.'
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

Putting this here because the answer may be totally un bdsm related for some.
My question is how did you know he / she was the one?
 
Edited to add - By 'the one' i mean the one for now, the one forever, the one for tomorrow. Not really asking if you believe in 'the one.'

Great question, I have not found my Ds soulmate yet.
Its easier to see what I don't want lately.
I know what I want, it will happen for me.
At this stage of my life, it is so much better and easier for
me to wait and not settle.
Life is good!

_____________________________

Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain


What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

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